6/17/2018 - Trannymobile on Parade - Even gayer than my mom's gay Prius

[Zbk3VmLfujjzjxBd43tL]

I wonder if there's any posts asking for advice on that one Porsche forum Brianna always visits.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

I wonder if the seats are covered with rapidly cycling dildoes?

 

[Kosher Dill]

@W person cow
Paging Warren to the thread, maybe he can tell us exactly what the "campaign vehicle" is.

 

[Dr. Merkwurdichliebe]

That's designed for the Porsche Macan, which is an SUV. John doesn't have a Macan so I don't think that would fit.

True. I'll look for a rig for the 911.

How long before John tells us this is what he did as a liile girl in Mississippi?

https://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-medi...l_progressive,q_80,w_320/17o5ej1lrp6a2jpg.jpg

 

[Red Hood]

No one would be dumb enough to use a Porsche to pull a parade float except John. And it’s entirely for bragging rights.

There are several good reasons body-on-frame vehicles are preferred for towing as opposed to a unibody (and at that, a rear engine, high revving sports car). Wonder what a borked Porsche subframe costs to repair?

 

[Dr. Merkwurdichliebe]

Wonder what a borked Porsche subframe costs to repair?

Ask Frank in a few weeks. He should know the answer to the penny.

ETA:

Porsche says that the towing limit on the 911 is a bit over 5,000 pounds if you use a Porsche OEM hitch. I suspect that towing with the hitch John will buy on eBay will void several sections of the car's warranty.

Can't even find the Porsche hitch online. The cost might even get Frank's attention.

 

[The Great Citracett]

In my experience, politicians tend to use vehicles borrowed from a local dealership as campaign vehicles. They just stick a magnet to the door with the campaign logo on it and it's also free advertising for the dealer. Usually it's a convertible so the candidate can wave and throw candy or whatever. They'll borrow a pickup for towing a float, same deal, campaign magnet and free advertising.

Wu on the other hand would probably try to use the Porsche and would smoke the clutch before the first block. There's a very good reason most parade vehicles are automatics, or at least have a super low first gear like fire trucks or farm tractors. They should avoid the Porsche because the last thing the Wu campaign needs is another fucked up tranny.

That, and what dealership would want Wu's endorsement?

 

[Red Hood]

Wu on the other hand would probably try to use the Porsche and would smoke the clutch before the first block. There's a very good reason most parade vehicles are automatics, or at least have a super low first gear like fire trucks or farm tractors. They should avoid the Porsche because the last thing the Wu campaign needs is another fucked up tranny.

This last line? Pure fucking genius, my dude.

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

Paging Warren to the thread, maybe he can tell us exactly what the "campaign vehicle" is.

It's probably his car/small suv, he seems like the type to own an old Rav4 or something.

 

[The Great Citracett]

I'd actually forgotten about it, but Porsche makes this big, expensive, trailer-towing bastard.

Better break out that wallet, Frank!

 

[UselessRubberKeyboard]

I'd actually forgotten about it, but Porsche makes this big, expensive, trailer-towing bastard.
Wyświetl załącznik 475656
Better break out that wallet, Frank!

fftopic:Jesus, that's an ugly car.

 

[Pubic Enemy #1]

Wait so is it confirmed the "campaign car" is a Porsche? It's early here so apologies if I'm being dense and missing shit. Why is Wu going out of her way to appear as little like a normal, relatable human as possible?

 

[The Great Citracett]

Wait so is it confirmed the "campaign car" is a Porsche? It's early here so apologies if I'm being dense and missing shit. Why is Wu going out of her way to appear as little like a normal, relatable human as possible?

It's still all just speculation, though I wouldn't put it past her.

Also, here's a goofy campaign car thing I just threw together for fun:

 

[polonium]

Wait so is it confirmed the "campaign car" is a Porsche? It's early here so apologies if I'm being dense and missing shit. Why is Wu going out of her way to appear as little like a normal, relatable human as possible?

A sane person would rent a pickup or a diesel wagon or something like that for the afternoon, so of course John is going to try to use the Porsche and burn out the clutch in front of a crowd of people, trying to pull away with a float full of retards behind him.

 

[millais]

He's never made it to any public demonstration or event despite all his promises to show up at every single one. I don't think there's reason to believe he will show up to this one either. So far he has only showed up to closed door events to avoid the public ridicule.

 

[captn_kettle]

I'm assuming John is going to rent out/acquire a suitable car, because towing an access mobility trailer in a Porsche sports car is just fucking laughable.

Sports car drivers (especially Porsche) are fucking notorious for being known as the ones who park in handicapped spaces just to stop scratches on their car. The only other people who do so are drivers of fancy footballer SUVs such as the Porsche Cayenne.

Anything that isn't sensible is going to be laughed off instantly, and they're going to be seen as a way to lap up votes off the back of disabled people who genuinely struggle with disability access.

 

[crayolasword]

Ok. So I haven’t seen any of this mentioned. Tounge Weight. Yeah. A Porsche probably can tow 5,000 pounds. My Jeep Wrangler is limited in what it can tow not because of a lack of torque but because the cross member that the towing package is attached to can’t support enough weight. Some people have reinforced the cross member and what not. They can tow more now. Tounge weight is what’s going to really fuck John over and cause all sorts of high jinks to ensue. I’ve attached a picture demonstrating what I’m talking about.

 

[AnOminous]

Is John actually allergic to pickup trucks or something because that's what he should be using.

 

[crayolasword]

Exactly. It’s not like he’d need a dually with a fifth wheel or anything. To be honest any pick up with a V-8 would do the job.

The most hilarious outcome for this would be John hooking up the float to the tranny bike.

 

[The Great Citracett]

I think my favorite outcome would be Wu on the bike, on a trailer, pulled by the Porsche. It incorporates all her favorite things while addressing the fact she can't actually ride the bike. And she could even tweet about gamergate while being pulled along. Something like this, but with the trannycycle:

There's even room for a dog or two.