The Unofficial Kiwi Poorfag Resource Thread - share recipes and resources for your area (both government and personal) here

[Aunt Carol]

It's more of a pipe dream because I always wanted to be able to make my own icecream. Sure, I could just make it the old fashioned way and I probably would if I was any more serious than I am.

Dumb question: you ever make zip-top bag ice cream? Nothing unusual to buy, and it makes a small amount.

Fun project to set kids to making if you have kids to entertain; like churning butter as an experiment, with better payoff. If the kids have more enthusiasm than sense, make them do it outside, and if you're not sure about how well your bags seal, double-bag the interior bag (the one that will become the ice cream).

 

[pylosurf]

It's more of a pipe dream because I always wanted to be able to make my own icecream.

Probably more of a BIFL than a Poorfag option, but a KitchenAid mixer with ice cream attachment makes excellent ice cream / sorbet, and the mixer can do lots of other things besides making ice cream.

 

[FatalTater]

Dumb question: you ever make zip-top bag ice cream? Nothing unusual to buy, and it makes a small amount.

I do that myself, but I use whole or 2% milk and just put the container in the freezer and mix it every 10-15 minutes. It's fun.

 

[saturated trans fats]

The produce in orchards and fields is free if you harvest it before the farmers.

 

[Diet Coke 4 Life]

The produce in orchards and fields is free if you harvest it before the farmers.

Depending on the farmers, that's a good way to get yourself shot. Not recommended.

 

[PetiteFeet]

Probably more of a BIFL than a Poorfag option, but a KitchenAid mixer with ice cream attachment makes excellent ice cream / sorbet, and the mixer can do lots of other things besides making ice cream.

I am definitely a huge fan of BIFL, it's such a shame that most machines made in 2020+ are built to break down. BIFL doesn't sell products, y'know.

 

[Aunt Carol]

The produce in orchards and fields is free if you harvest it before the farmers.

The produce on people's trees is often free if you ask politely, though. If you network some, your coworker's friend will let you in their back yard to pick the apples or plums or whatever an old person can't eat alone.

I mean, walking by an overburdened tree with branches hanging into the alley is obvious--you don't have to be overly scrupulous if you can interpret context-- but coming over with the kids and buckets and a ladder is a score that's worth pursuing.

 

[Maori Kiwifruit Growers]

Also, I'll state that with cheap grounds, going marginally lighter on the quantity is better also. I brew cheap dark roast coffee at my house all the time, and we use about 4 lightly heaped scoops (my scoop is a 1 tbsp scoop if I recall correctly) for a 12 cup pot, and toss in about 1/2 tsp of salt directly in with the grounds before running the pot through. If we need more powerful go-go juice, 6 scoops and 1 tsp. It makes a nice, smooth cup of Jo that's no so bitter it's trying to rip your tastebuds off your tongue. I can drink it black with glee, but will sprinkle in one packet of splenda into my 16 oz mug if I'm feeling squirrelly and want sweetness in my life.

Spoiler: carrier life anecdote

So on my last ship, the messies had the weird idea that tar in the pot was what we wanted. Everyone grumbled and groused about the shit coffee on the mess decks.

One day, when I'd had enough (I was among the first of the chiefs there every day because my department had to be early as fuck at all times), I told them to dump the kettle they'd brewed, and start over. I pointed at a wood picture frame we had mounted on the mess's wall and told them that I wanted the coffee in the percolator's tube to match that shade of brown, and that they needed to dust their grounds in salt. They'd been brewing it so the tube was /black/ and using no salt.

They followed the directions, brewed it to a delightful mahogany shade... and we ended up having to share our coffee with the entire damned wardroom when word got out that the chief's mess had fixed the coffee. We couldn't keep them out - we were in a shared mess onboard a shipyard barge because our ship was in dry dock. Blasted officers fucking drained our stores more than once.

Any particular type of salt?

Dumb question: you ever make zip-top bag ice cream? Nothing unusual to buy, and it makes a small amount.

Fun project to set kids to making if you have kids to entertain; like churning butter as an experiment, with better payoff. If the kids have more enthusiasm than sense, make them do it outside, and if you're not sure about how well your bags seal, double-bag the interior bag (the one that will become the ice cream).

Yes once when I was younger and it was horrible. Ice cream makers are one of those things that people either buy thinking they're going to use it or they get it as a gift and then they never use it so they tend to pile up in goodwill or fb market. For the $10 I suggest picking one up. You can get the "reusable pints" pretty cheap too. I have made better ice cream at home than buying it outside.


While we are on the topic of buying appliances, a stand mixer, a dutch oven, an instant pot and an air fryer can all be gotten used for cheap and will make cooking at home far more enjoyable.

 

[Diet Coke 4 Life]

Any particular type of salt?

Any salt is fine. I used iodized salt because it's what I have in my cupboard. On the ship, we used the 'whatever the fuck the government decided to include in the supply shipment this month' salt.

 

[Accept Only Substitutes]

Any salt is fine. I used iodized salt because it's what I have in my cupboard. On the ship, we used the 'whatever the fuck the government decided to include in the supply shipment this month' salt.

I don’t think I said anything after I tried this method, but it’s made a huge difference. Thank you! I am using a lot less Splenda (I use the liquid stuff from Amazon because it doesn’t have maltodextrin) and so much less creamer. If I use a flavored one, I can actually taste the flavor! I haven’t tried it black yet, but I’m happy with where I am right now.

Unless it gets to room temperature, then it’s not good. I didn’t use to have a problem with it at room temperature a few years ago, but now I do. I blame my glp-1, because lots of stuff I used to love no longer tastes good.