Hi everyone, it's your boy Zach, and I know I said I wasn't going to cover Eric July anymore, but Turns out when you put not interested in this channel, and then you watch a video from his channel YouTube goes are you really not interested and then it shows you when he puts up the next video which in this was a second response to a video that didn't bother him Because we all know when something doesn't bother you when you make two responses Which have a total time of like ten times longer than the thing that didn't bother you So, uh, I guess like a couple days ago a guy who I don't think is wearing a toupee, but everyone says he is I'm kind of sensitive to false charges of toupee wearing because I had a friend who Who I thought he was old He was probably a couple years older than I am right now And he had a great head of hair so great that everybody thought it was a wig And the funny thing is he would always brag about his hair and I would say what's the point of having a full head of hair at your age if Everyone thinks you're wearing a wig People laugh at wig guys. They're laughing at you. You should shave like a bulb spot into the back of it So people can see it's real But anyway, I I believe his name is Marcus, I don't remember the name of his channel I think he's a vet but I might be Confusing him with another channel.
I've been watching his tik-tok for I don't know of a year Probably since the beginning of the year and it's good. He very much doesn't like Right-wing stuff, but he actually reads comics, which is a very not right-wing thing to do Okay What I'm saying is he doesn't fake reading comics He discussed Ripa verse, but at no no point does he claim to have read the comics? He doesn't like them. He made a video he accurately described Ripa versus place in comics, which is Asterisk not really and the relationship to the fans but he kept saying both in the video and in the comments that Eric July had said terrible things Kept repeating the claim, but never gave for motley an example I don't think Eric July's ever said anything interesting.
Sorry I don't think I do think that Eric July ever said something offensive. His schtick is basically GTA for ebonics Plus and then in brackets Stanley divided by Eeyore Equals Eric July you might want to put in there like plus like Toastmasters or one of those places where they teach people how to interact he interacts with I think Eric's autistic quite frankly I think the ebonics and the bebopping kind of throws you off because he doesn't have the Autistic voice, but if you notice when he talks It's very mannered with the facial expressions Like, you know this I should raise my eyebrows when I say this, but he keeps reverting to like this just zero affect dead expression in Between being very animated. So I feel like he practices being human But anyway, so a second video response to a video that didn't bother him at all which means it really really really bothered him and He's going for the second phase which is people are being mean to me, which is how you sell conservative and Republican Concert conservative and libertarian comics.
That's that's how they are sold 99% of the time I used to track like all these different Crowdfunding accounts and there would always be a blip and people would say oh what happened there? Oh, somebody said something mean to him on Twitter or tried to get him to not go to a convention And so he had a big jump in sales and then it trails off and then if you can have someone be mean to you Again, you'll get another bump in sales because hashtag we will what when what are we gonna win? Fun according to Eric who's lying through his teeth that this company was built on fun Shut the fuck up We were all there he's dancing around for various reasons, but The whole I mean he said it flat-out he was gonna moonwalk on the face of the mainstream industry He was gonna take over This is a new blah blah blah this and that everything and then it flamed the fuck out because his ideas suck Two things can be true at the same time Eric July was unfairly criticized maligned attacked by people Also, he sucks and his comics suck There's a there's a new push that Nobody who says Eric July's comics suck have have read them. I've read about a half dozen and they're not good Even worse when I stopped reading them. I read how he describes them or doesn't describe them I've never heard a crossover event and he's got an upcoming crossover event described as This is a good amount of years since the beginning of the company he had a video where he never remotely described The storyline the concept just that four is a good amount of years Ten would have been too many So four is good That was it.
He sells things. He doesn't just everything is based on culture war and false I always mispronounce this scarcity Scarcity Skip scarcity sounds more correct Like I saw him he's got these document cards which are Basically the Watcher in the Ripper versus document because he documents things Eric July has an amazing ability to create names That were very obviously created by Eric July and it's always like the most Amazing well amazingly stupid Illustrious, which is weird. They're always named like velocity philosophy time What's his power? He can run fast Anything else I used to run track You know, it's supposed to be he can run fast But if he runs too fast this happens or if he can run fast But in order to run fast this bad thing or this difficult thing, there's there's no twist It's a straight line It would just like the least right-wing I'm sorry, they're so gay News flash patriots.
I was watching A Netflix show for kids for like six hours I watched a couple and then the power went out and the screen got all dark and There was just like this gay guy looking back at me and like he was on a couch like mine and he was like Everything was the same except for it was just mirrored and it was just like this gay guy Just staring at me and then the power of it went back on and it went back to the cartoon for kids Does that happen to you? That's my average right-wing youtuber impersonation, but anyway so Toupee guy, I'm sorry not to pay guy. He got things right about the ripper verse in general Especially the relationship of the ripper verse to The fans are very codependent Every time I talk about it, so you just he did things you did nothing. Why why do you he's not in the fucking Special Olympics.
This is a grown-ass man. Just doing something isn't impressive His books suck, you know that I know you know that because you never talk about his characters or stories and when you rarely do I Saw I forget what it was. He was like the other day.
It's like I Sounds really interesting to me. Oh, this is non-sarcastic sarcastic. By the way, it's gonna sound sarcastic I really liked how his power set was strengthened him in a vulnerability Like that sounds sarcastic The river verse is if you were in traffic and you saw a generic superhero on the side of a plumber van and you said What's his story? What does he do? What his power is probably flight and strength, right? Or if you were at the dentist's office it's it's basically the generic superheroes from like the side of plumber vans and pamphlets at dentist's offices That's the ripper verse like there's no creativity.
So Eric July goes like really with just like the most miserable face talking about it. I Just want to come to be fun. I don't want nobody could jibber-jabber.
Okay, so you always used to say we will win What were people winning? Fun were they winning fun or were they winning a war a Culture war. I mean even we sell stuff. It's this is how we sell stuff.
It's like We got documented card 8.5. You got to get out. There's a limited amount of them Uh, it's not gonna come out until we put five six seven and eight So you should buy those two it's like what is this just buy things? Why why are we just buying random things? because That's how we win we buy crap from conservatives and libertarians and Ipso facto to the transitive power divided by the square root of its crap. It's 2026 Isom sucks the river verse sucks Eric July sucks That's one true thing Another true thing.
He does get him fairly attacked because he's a libertarian because he's associated with conservatives But is it really unfair if you encourage that every day for years Don't give me this fucking Eddie Haskell Like bullshit. It's like I never said I was anti woke. I said I was a non woke yeah, and then you said hashtag we will win and you're gonna tap dance on the face of the Moonwalker something skateboard on the face of the industry That you know nothing about Because you started reading comics when making reviews of them on YouTube was an easy way to get clicks That your comic book fandom is based on having bric-a-brac from Hobby Lobby in the background of your libertarian videos the year before you started reviewing comics Feel like I've repeated myself a lot But this is stage two.
The first reaction was go attack this man for criticizing me The second stage is buy my books because people were mean to me so I want to make a little analogy for all the Ripitards, I used to think that was so mean. I was like, that's not nice. That's unnecessary.
Then I interacted with them. I was like that's just a Objective neutral like they're literally slow I Want to make an analogy to you? Because something that happened to me before is happening again. I mentioned when I went to Iraq the first time I lost a ton of weight 40-50 pounds I had no fat on my body and everything hurt it hurt to sit in The padded driver's seat of a Humvee.
I'd be driving over there through Samoa Iraq and People would be like why are you leaning to the side? You have hemorrhoids? It's like I have no ass cheeks There's no fat There's a pelvis there's a very thin layer of Muscle and fascia and then there's skin with nerves on it. It hurts to sit on anything People might say why did you lose so much weight? Well heat plus bad food plus sometimes no food plus Okay, I hope you're not eating right now Shitting on a Wooden toilet outside into a bucket and the the flies eating the shit flying to your mouth. So yeah That that was that was ozempic for freakin 2003.
That was the 2003 version of ozempic Flies going directly from human shit into my mouth and me constantly being sick, but without a layer of fat everything hurts Recently I lost not 50 pounds, but a good amount of weight but half as much but it was quick and All sudden it's like why do my elbows hurt all the time? What like every look there's not a rash like again, why is that hurt to sit down? Why do I feel so? I have no fat. I had this layer of fat protecting me and it's gone and the the Rip averse is so bad because of the fans Because you've never been allowed to criticize him So he works in this false Narrative this false world of I don't know what the problem be people just be mean to me People aren't mean to you unnecessarily sometimes also you suck if I go You know join a bowling league and I suck and I never try to get better and I have friends who just like oh, they're mean to you. No, you fucking suck I don't think it was ever in the cards for Eric July to be talented.
I just don't think he has it But to be as bad as he is with so much experience is Stephanie Phillips like and she doesn't have a soul Eric you're black. That's what y'all are known for Having soul You got as much or as little zero soul as Stephanie fucking Phillips and One of the things I hate I'm gonna wrap this up. One of the things I hate is When people want to like zing someone so There's a video of them talking and then you like stop it at a particular point Just because their face will be all screwed up and they'll look stupid.
There's a famous picture of Trump He looks like a like a chipmunk or something like ho-ho Look us everybody looks stupid if you take like a freeze-frame at a certain part of them talking But whenever I take a freeze-frame, it's just him looking utterly miserable Why are you here? I Know you think you're gonna do all these deals and suddenly people are gonna give you what like a Netflix deal you're gonna get bought out by the guys who bought Dark Horse It's not in the cards. Your shit sucks You have fewer than a thousand repeat customers and you're not getting better because of them because they have slathered this Layer of fire retardant gel around you so you never feel the flames You never learn to not touch the stove Because they're always there to protect you there's always a reason you're not allowed to criticize Eric July So anyway just to recap toupee guy is not wearing a toupee Eric it can be Unfairly attacked and suck at the same time but the reason he sucks is Because of his fans and because they form this What is it? What is that Roman? Testudo or something like that Forum testudo, and it's just they just Give him this shield all the time. Nothing is ever correct.
He's never wrong You can't nobody can criticize him ever. He'll do little Eddie Haskell stuff. I appreciate your criticism.
No, you're directing Your zippy the pinhead fans to attack this guy and attack his looks and attack everything about him Which is what they're doing. That is Gail Simone 101 Anyway, I'm bored of talking about him again seek life elsewhere You're obviously not enjoying this and What is the point Jeez in the frickin the first response to the video that didn't bother him You even admitted that the Hachette deal does not include Books on shelves at stores So all this hoopla is just that You can go to a Barnes & Noble in America or what does that you have in the UK Waterstone something like that? and you can say like Hello, I Would like to order I saw him three He's like you're taking the piss mate. I mean, they'll do it for you, but like it's it's Who's gonna do that a couple dozen people as a novelty? No Anyway, um, yeah, Eric July sucks and he sucks even more because of his fans.
Thanks for watching. Bye
[SPOILER/]
EVS EFAP of Ya Goy Zack:
