🍗 Deathfat Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

[maggots]

About 16 minutes in Tess turns on her southern accent and just . She really is the fakest of them all. She sounds gayer than her guest til that accent comes out and she sounds the way she looks, fat and crabby. I skimmed the episode and it isn’t even worth a recap, I do suggest listening at the 16 -19 min mark for a laugh.

 

[Gay Mouth]

About 16 minutes in Tess turns on her southern accent and just . She really is the fakest of them all. She sounds gayer than her guest til that accent comes out and she sounds the way she looks, fat and crabby. I skimmed the episode and it isn’t even worth a recap, I do suggest listening at the 16 -19 min mark for a laugh.

Tess: for me, all of my joking, and me being the hilarious person that I am is 100% from childhood trauma.

The fag she’s interviewing: those are the two options, cry or laugh. And I just knew that if I can get the joke out before you, now you look stupid, my joke is funnier than yours, and I... still feel bad, but at least I’m the one who made the joke! You need to control your space, that’s what comedy is.

Tess:

 

[Crepidodera fulvicornis]

Tess: for me, all of my joking, and me being the hilarious person that I am is 100% from childhood trauma.

The fag she’s interviewing: those are the two options, cry or laugh. And I just knew that if I can get the joke out before you, now you look stupid, my joke is funnier than yours, and I... still feel bad, but at least I’m the one who made the joke! You need to control your space, that’s what comedy is.

Tess:
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[America's Giggling Gigolo]

That sweater she's wearing is actually the most flattering thing she's ever appeared in. It keeps those Gardulla the Hutt yeast encrusted fat folds well hidden.

 

[Miss Misery]

That sweater she's wearing is actually the most flattering thing she's ever appeared in. It keeps those Gardulla the Hutt yeast encrusted fat folds well hidden.

And yet she still looks like a giant jar of mustard...

 

[NoReturn]

So, she went to another podcast. For the love of me I won't listen it, so this comment kinda useless, but perhaps there is a brave soul ready to sacrifice.
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Oh, now I remember why I stopped listening to this podcast.

Thanks for the summary @maggots. Like @Crepidodera fulvicornis had also forgotten why I had stopped listening until your post. I was all ready to dive back in.

Remember kidzz, self love is:

* Getting a job
* KEEPING the job
* Showering regularly with SOAP and HOT WATER
* Cutting your own toenails instead of waiting for your feeder/tard wrangler to do it for you
* Wiping your own ass after you take a dump

Don't forget drinking enough water and maintaining a healthy sleep schedule.

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Of course she loves the water. It's a hippo's natural habitat.

Bonus content:

 

[Me262PrinceOfTurboJet]

What fucking energy!? She doesn't even have energy to bathe regularly.

 

[Daddy's Little Kitten]

More feeder shit and wow, so fucking deep.

That hairline keeps thinning.

 

[America's Giggling Gigolo]

Another fleeting glimpse of Mean Girl Tess!! Yes Hoof Hoven, the weedeaters are loud. But they're gardeners or groundskeepers, just doing their job, and you DO live in an apartment complex (not a house like you claim).

 

[multiverse]

Another fleeting glimpse of Mean Girl Tess!! Yes Hoof Hoven, the weedeaters are loud. But they're gardeners or groundskeepers, just doing their job, and you DO live in an apartment complex (not a house like you claim).


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Christ her skin is APPALLING. That acne? In her late 30s? That shit is never going to heal. You are out of new collegen by age 37 and she is going to be scarred for life.

Not that it matters, as the rest of her lie won't last more than 15 years.

 

[he who has thus come/gone]

Christ her skin is APPALLING. That acne? In her late 30s? That shit is never going to heal. You are out of new collegen by age 37 and she is going to be scarred for life.

Can't you just supplement with collagen? I, at least, put a scoop in my cup of coffee in the morning.

 

[Gay Mouth]

Can't you just supplement with collagen? I, at least, put a scoop in my cup of coffee in the morning.

That helps, but in what universe is Tess using food for nutrition and healing? She’s not interested unless it comes in a needle or a cake box.

 

[he who has thus come/gone]

That helps, but in what universe is Tess using food for nutrition and healing? She’s not interested unless it comes in a needle or a cake box.

You know, for someone who claims to love water, her skin looks like she drinks soda and alcohol for all her hydration. I try to be aware of sugar intake because I don't like having acne from eating too much of it, but Tess will eat 2 full cakes a week, use a pound of make up and injections, then talk about loving herself. It's just sad how horribly she treats her body.

 

[Rotogravure]

Christ /r/popping would love those blackheads.

 

[America's Giggling Gigolo]

Ma man Ma Mo is thirsty:

 

[Water-T]

Ma man Ma Mo is thirsty:

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Good news, Ma Mo: for $100 she'll video herself farting on the sweater. She will mail it to you for an extra $100. PayPal and CashApp only.

 

[Umaibae]

Another fleeting glimpse of Mean Girl Tess!! Yes Hoof Hoven, the weedeaters are loud. But they're gardeners or groundskeepers, just doing their job, and you DO live in an apartment complex (not a house like you claim).


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Ah, yes. This is the skin of someone paid to advertise skincare products. Yup.

 

[Flawmil]

Tess “I’m queer” Holliday only seems to be dating men?

 

[Daddy's Little Kitten]

She losing feeders?

 

[GrouchiCorn]

I love how any guys that mess with her end up calling things off rapidly. I don't know why she admits to that, but it's hilarious