💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Głosy: 6 0,4%
  • April-May 2024

    Głosy: 6 0,4%
  • June-July 2024

    Głosy: 17 1,1%
  • August-September 2024

    Głosy: 34 2,1%
  • October-November 2024

    Głosy: 37 2,3%
  • December 2024

    Głosy: 44 2,8%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Głosy: 256 16,1%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Głosy: 261 16,4%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Głosy: 930 58,5%

  • Łączna liczba głosujących
    1 591
Why would Jack stop claiming to be carnivore just because he's filming himself eating non-meats? He's been doing that from the start. Despite his attempts to lie or cut around it, we know he indiscriminately inhales whatever is within reach.
It's not a matter of him no longer pretending to be carnivore. Like Steak Tartare said, his carni/keto messes of overcooked creamcheese, cottage cheese, eggs, and sawdust parmesan were fucking boring. Sure were all know he wasn't on a carnivore diet, he fucked that up within the first week or so with the mashed potatoes bullshit pretending it was "BUDDUR". Fat on the go is usually boring, and will likely stay that way. But with dropping the larp he's gone back to making some horrendous shit.

The recent mac and congealed cheese. The pile of melted cookie mess that looked like someone dropped some diarrhea on a cookie tray. The jar of ranch dressing cowboy cum buddur. The severely undercooked brownie mess. The grainy looking broccoli and cheese soup.

By him dropping his carni bullshit no matter how much he wants to claim he's still on it, we've gotten more interesting videos in the past month than the year prior it seems.
 
Thanks, fren, but I use ZO Skin Health. Medical-grade, no prescription necessary.
Dr. Obagi is legit, but please note that “medical grade” is a term created by marketers and has no actual basis in fact. Ditto “pharmaceutical grade” and similar labels. Vanicream and Eucerin are two drugstore brands that will take care of the vast majority of sensitive or otherwise problematic skin. If you’ve found a routine that works for you, great. But there’s no need to spend shitloads of money on skincare unless you want to. Prescriptions for skin issues are often generics that cost a dollar or two, not costly at all.

AI lacks the human cook's palate to make something that taste good, it can work sometimes but most of the times it won't
Not all AI programs are the same. I’ve had shockingly good luck using ChatGPT to help me adapt recipes based on what I have on hand or ingredients I’m trying to avoid using. These have mostly been baked goods experiments but it also helped me produce some very good sauces. There was one instance where it came up with a bean burger recipe I didn’t like, and that stands out because it was a rare miss in my experience.
 
That food looks mediocre at best
They got the equivalent of above-average bar food. A step above B-dubs. The kind of mildly presentable chicken fried abortions a drunk idiot will inhale. Not exactly Marco White behind the counter deep frying chicken wangs and preparing ass on a bun or whatever Jeanette got.

Dr. Obagi is legit, but please note that “medical grade” is a term created by marketers and has no actual basis in fact. Ditto “pharmaceutical grade” and similar labels. Vanicream and Eucerin are two drugstore brands that will take care of the vast majority of sensitive or otherwise problematic skin. If you’ve found a routine that works for you, great. But there’s no need to spend shitloads of money on skincare unless you want to. Prescriptions for skin issues are often generics that cost a dollar or two, not costly at all.


Not all AI programs are the same. I’ve had shockingly good luck using ChatGPT to help me adapt recipes based on what I have on hand or ingredients I’m trying to avoid using. These have mostly been baked goods experiments but it also helped me produce some very good sauces. There was one instance where it came up with a bean burger recipe I didn’t like, and that stands out because it was a rare miss in my experience.
Prescriptions are in my experience 1-2% stronger than the store shit and that makes a huge difference. Store-bought Nizoral (1%) vs. Rx. ketoconazole (2%) is night and day.
Alas, all the sunscreen, lotion, skincare in the world won't keep some huwhites from searing like an ahi tuna in the sun. Sad, but true.
Just shower and wash your face every day and you, too, can look like an androgynous kpop boy band lead!

This cooking with AI shit is a fucking travesty and reminds me of why Marco P. White is my favorite chef. "There is no recipe." and "We live in a world of innovation, not invention."
I used to follow cooking instructions to. A. T. Autistically measuring quantities, cooking times, temps*, etc. Having a meltdown when after the stated cooking time, it didn't look done. Letting shit burn because the box said 20 minutes. My maw didn't do any of that shit. She cooked for damn near a century and never measured or wrote down anything. Ever since I was a whipper I chimped at her for never measuring the goddamn BUDDUR and she just nodded and said "okay." Turns out if you're a good enough chef you can use your senses to Make It Great and even innovate new dishes on top of it. You don't need a globohomo silicon valley robit telling you to add basil after baking the pizz'.

Oddly enough I also never see Jack measure shit either. Not that you have much you need to measure when you're dumping the whole bag of wood chipper cheese in.

*temps are the exception. Experienced or not, you should probably have a thermometer somewhere just to make sure your friends/family don't join the salmonellers.
 
Ostatnio edytowane:
Why would Jack stop claiming to be carnivore just because he's filming himself eating non-meats? He's been doing that from the start. Despite his attempts to lie or cut around it, we know he indiscriminately inhales whatever is within reach.
At least at the start he was trying to pretend he was on carnivore. Now he's just going through the motions.

It was like when he was "leaning" keto and thought that it was good enough.
 
hovered a little long on this page didn't we?
How the fuck is that hippie burrito Irish? I mean it actually sounds kind of good but wtf.
Not all AI programs are the same. I’ve had shockingly good luck using ChatGPT to help me adapt recipes based on what I have on hand or ingredients I’m trying to avoid using. These have mostly been baked goods experiments but it also helped me produce some very good sauces. There was one instance where it came up with a bean burger recipe I didn’t like, and that stands out because it was a rare miss in my experience.
IMO this is because for a search on almost any ingredient or "what can I substitute for X," there's a ton of human-generated content to train on, so results coming from a prompt that adapts preexisting recipes is almost always going to be from an LLM trained on exactly the kind of data that does that well.
It was like when he was "leaning" keto and thought that it was good enough.
That was one of his pure retard moments, because there is no such thing as "leaning" keto. You're either in ketosis or you're not. The only reason Jack isn't already dead is he never actually entered ketosis. It would have killed a fat diabetic stroked-out idiot like him. That kind of diet is for the young and otherwise healthy who can suck up the negative side effects of a diet like that.
Oddly enough I also never see Jack measure shit either. Not that you have much you need to measure when you're dumping the whole bag of wood chipper cheese in.
The thing is your granny who never measured anything didn't bother because she just knew on an instinctual level exactly how to do it, what signs showed up while cooking, what to add if things appeared to be going sideways, how to respond when she tasted it, and what actually tasted good.

Or your grampa for that matter. My favorite swiss steak and ham and beans recipes are from things he cooked during World War II and I found what I am pretty sure is the exact recipe on the Internet Archive.

1944 Army Cookbook

I have also used the 1942 one, but this is slightly better. The shit on a shingle recipe is also pretty good.

This is the swiss steak I really like from the 1944 version.

Grampa used to make this in a pressure cooker, the old style non-electric one that makes somewhat scary hissing noises.
Screenshot 2026-01-15 182804.png
 
Ostatnio edytowane:
he's live with the ellis way (that channel he was "mentoring" a while ago)
i've only been watching for 2 minutes and it's extremely painful to listen to..
1768526415770.png
edit: jack is venting about his childhood/family life, he just said his mother left his father when he was younger. i was not aware of this bit of lore.
 
Ostatnio edytowane:
https://youtu.be/eUv8nsnTSCU

In one of Jagoff's Morning Movements this past week, he offered more "sage" "wisdom": a family code word- in case of trouble. He suggested a word like *cookie*. Too generic imo

Dozens of better options I'm sure, I'll offer three of them:
*Gudmeetz*
*FatRetardedFaggot*
*Stroke*
 
Ostatnio edytowane przez moderatora:
He's huffing and puffing yet can't even stand up leaning on something to pretend he is ambulatory for the audience. Kalshi prediction markets just crashed.
How does "Lazy Man's" mac and cheese even make sense. You retard dick, it is already the ultimate lazy man dish, just fuckin open up the box of Velveeta shells and cheese and make it. It's like "Lazy Man's" fucking ramen noodles, just open up the ramen noodles and boil them, bitch.

This fucking idiot. This stroked-out mental retard faggot.
 
I think he's sitting on a stool or something. His body is lower than it should be if he was leaning on something.
Edit: I see the walker in the background, so it most certainly is not that.
He's been sitting on his scooty puff for the longest time. You can see in the previous videos when he's mixing things in that his arm is at the level of the pot and he can't see what he's doing.

How does "Lazy Man's" mac and cheese even make sense. You retard dick, it is already the ultimate lazy man dish, just fuckin open up the box of Velveeta shells and cheese and make it. It's like "Lazy Man's" fucking ramen noodles, just open up the ramen noodles and boil them, bitch.

This fucking idiot. This stroked-out mental retard faggot.
The whole "Lazy Man" shtick has always been a joke. I've brought it up before but it bears repeating but this isn't a "Lazy Man" recipe.


It's a knock-off recipe at best. It's something you whip together because you have company that shows up unexpectedly and you serve them this along with coffee.

And the retarded point is, I can guarantee you that half the homes in America have thrown this together at one point in time.
 
https://youtube.com/watch?v=K_os1E1jI5g
He's huffing and puffing yet can't even stand up leaning on something to pretend he is ambulatory for the audience. Kalshi prediction markets just crashed.
Shitty walmart brand pasta shells, check.
Barely any water, check.
Salt, check.
Stirring mac and cheese with a pair of tongs for some reason, check.

Seegrit ingredients. Blue cheese crumbles from Tammy for a tangent that has nothing to do with the recipe, check.

Evaporated milk into overcooked shitty pasta shells with starch water, continue to stir with tongs, check.
1 pound of sawdust shreddy cheese, check.

So this man has added a pound of shitty pasta, a can of evaporated milk, and a pound shreddy cheese to a pot with some water and calls this "mac and cheese".
Screenshot 2026-01-17 080108.png
"it looks better than the stuff we made last week" as if that would be difficult to do, even for Fatty. For some reason he decides to "blow it off" as he eats a spoonfull, making kissy faces at the camera. No, I'm not joking. Also he somehow has chunks of some substance on his shirt.
Screenshot 2026-01-17 080253.png

Lets us know it's better than his congealed raw flour mess from last week. He could have just made some fucking velveeta shells and cheese or something. "I will make that every day of the week, that's as lazy as it gets"
 
Isn't lazy mac and cheese just Kraft? They even have those microwave cups to be even lazier.
My incarcerated business partner's retarded gay niece dropped out of their local chapter college and xit made a better mac with just water and no box. Set the dorm on fire trying to boil some water. Goes with the territory.
 
https://youtube.com/watch?v=K_os1E1jI5g
He's huffing and puffing yet can't even stand up leaning on something to pretend he is ambulatory for the audience. Kalshi prediction markets just crashed.
Mac and cheese again?

0:42: You're telling me this man that has a "cooking career" for over two decades still makes pasta from cold start? You supposed to put the pasta in boiling water, its gonna be soggy

3:00 how long is this thing cooking now? that's gotta be mush at this point, he puts evaporated milk in there instead of doing it apart in another pan with the cheese, i'm really not following the logic here

3:21: last step, BOLD MOVE JACK! Shreddy cheddar cheese

4:20: "that's better than the last week, honest to god" Well no shit Jack, at least we can say now you're not a liar

Anyways, soggy uninteresting pasta that will make you grow sick of it on the third bite. Too lazy to add bacon bits or any other protein to make it monochromatic flavor and appearance wise... I rate this a basicbitchpasta/10 and would not eat
 
You supposed to put the pasta in boiling water
I thought not using a colander is intentional, if disgusting, lazymaxxing, same with other parts involving just one pot and the tongs as the only equipment. Maybe I am presuming too much brainpower from him though.
 
Ostatnio edytowane:
I thought not using a collander is intentional, if disgusting, lazymaxxing, same with other parts involving just one pot and the tongs as the only equipment. Maybe I am presuming too much brainpower from him though.
Even though he has a nice variety of utensils in his kitchen, it's just his trademark to use just one pot to do whatever concoction he decides to

It's like a retarded dragon sleeping on top of a hoard of gold, but with kitchen equipment. What i'm curious about is the rationale behind the cold start with the pasta, if there's a rationale that is, and not just Jack being retarded. Terrible mouthfeel when the pasta is just mush
 
What i'm curious about is the rationale behind the cold start with the pasta
With the focus of filling it up "just enough to cover the pasta" and cooking it until "most of the water will be evaporated", I really think it is just an effort to avoid having to wash a colander from pasta water (which takes what, 5 seconds?). I refuse to believe he is retarded enough to not be able to boil pasta, but he has surprised me in the past.
He gives it a cold start so he can measure the water level against the already present pasta.
 
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