💀 Horrorcow Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta / "u/Early-Leopard-8351" - Polysubstance abusing puppy snuffing cuckold who dosed his child, "Lawtube pope" turned zesty Dabbleverse streamer. Swinger visitor of 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Seethed at his ex-BF Aaron on REDDIT. Wife's gunted and toed bod worth $50. Drives like a Jeet.

[Swole McPole]

so what's aaron's fine going to be? 2 whole KNUs?

I think more. I'm guessing about 7 KNU.

Aaron's mistake was taking April to visit Loch Ness. When they got there, the two of them were soaking in a Loch Ness hot tub. While they were in there, the Loch Ness monster came along and suggested that Aaron and April might want to try having some sex with the monster and his wife.

After they'd finished, the Loch Ness monster said that they'd all had a good time. Molly had been dropped, cocaine had been snorted, goo had been eaten. But now he found himself somewhat short of cash. So the monster asked Aaron if maybe he couldn't let him hold a few dollars just to tide him over.

"Sure, I can do that. How much do you need?" asked Aaron.

"Um, I need about t'ree fiddy" said the Loch Ness monster.

"I'm not giving you no t'ree fiddy", said Aaron. "April. don't be giving this monster no t'ree fiddy. Don't give him anything at all."

"I gave him a dollar", said April.

Well, the Loch Ness monster plied April with cocaine and molly. He subjected her to the perils of the balldo. And he used his wife, Mrs Loch Ness Monster to seduce Aaron by showing her his tits, hoping that one day, he'd slip up. And one day, he did. Poor Aaron found himself in court. Mrs Loch Ness Monster went on and on about how her privacy had been violated, and her naked udders had been displayed to a lone Scotsman wandering the shores of Loch Ness.

"What do you think would be an appropriate sum of compensation for this gross violation of your privacy rights?" the judge asked Mrs Loch Ness Monster.

"I needs about t'ree fiddy..." she replied.

"Can somebody translate that into Kandiyohi currency?" asked the judge.

"She needs about 7 KNU" replied the prosecution.

"And the defendent has to eat t'ree fiddy millilitres of my goo", shouted the Loch Ness Monster. "Because I'm the real victim here. Let's not lose sight of that. I've lost the best bull I ever had."

Death penalty for all parties, ruled the judge.

 

[Allied-Mastercomputer]

Any chance we could get a legal kiwi to sit in the stands at Aaron’s sentencing?

 

[DiabeticSydePhil]

The written order mentions such a deadline nowhere.

Does anywhere actually mention that Nick needs to work? I know everyone jokes his streaming counts, but I honestly dont know if working is a condition of his probation. Seems not to be.

 

[Happy Little War Painter]

Nick's Doom Loop:

1. Wake from stupor and hit head with fist
2. Read alog xeets from randoms
3. Seethe using barely disguised cope jokes
4. Insinuate vague threats against Aaron
5. Huff gas and continue seething
6. Ignore family as much as possible
7. Infest Mapton and related losers' chats
8. Call it a job done and day well utilized
9. Pass out in a haze of stimulants and depressants
10. Wake up from stupor and hit head...

You forgot watching STMS from start to finish.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

I honestly dont know if working is a condition of his probation.

His PO is taking an extremely hands-off approach. Nick could show up on-screen with cocaine on his nose and there would be zero consequences at this point.

 

[Oxyjen]

His PO is taking an extremely hands-off approach. Nick could show up on-screen with cocaine on his nose and there would be zero consequences at this point.

Sheeit, it like hamsterdam up in here

 

[Gorton Colu]

Its not impossible that Nick's PO wants what is best for Nick, his discontinued existence. Jail can only help Nick. Easier to melt his brain on the outside.

 

[Illuminati Order Official]

I'd be surprised if he maintains his enthusiasm for lawfare after he eventually loses to Monty.

Nick was never enthusiastic about lawfare. He's enthusiastic about revenge fantasies. Even his broken mind can't produce scenarios in which he outsmarts or physically overpowers his enemies so lawfare is the only way to play those fantasies in his head.

 

[Stiffy]

Question. Isn't Melton like 6'7 and about 400 lbs?
Is he like one of those big obese faggots that have to pay for two seats on a plane to travel?
There's already Meltonites in his discord trying to coach him on how to video Aaron's sentencing hearing and not get caught. MAPton thrown in a Stearns County jail and sodomized would be peak kino.

 

[Sneed Force One]

If we have any Kiwis attending, keep yourself exceptionally unremarkable.
This is Nick's moment of theatre, and its rude to interrupt the play.

There's already Meltonites in his discord trying to coach him on how to video Aaron's sentencing hearing and not get caught. MAPton thrown in a Stearns County jail and sodomized would be peak kino.

This would be completely retarded and easily traceable back to Melton. Every fucking video request has been flat out denied in every single related case.
I'm not full-on Zoo-spiracy tier, but its clearly in the local judiciary's interest to keep e-drama out of the courthouse.

 

[johnnynoname]

I don't know the specifics of aaron's deal, or any of that but if THE QUEEN!! is in his vicinity, and he, as a dad who had a pedo talk shit about his kid, should take a swing at him

 

[SaltyFanta]

>Start streaming career making fun of Greer
>End streaming career becoming Greer
Wyświetl załącznik 7546975
the ifunny mark stays on

He's already living out a fantasy of being a lawyer, and is creepy and sexually inappropriate. That nitrous just would just need to give his face some (un)lucky nerve damage and he'd be the full Greer.

 

[JamFlowMan]

You forgot watching STMS from start to finish.

Well nobody could keep their sobriety doing that

 

[Sneed Force One]

Any chance we could get a legal kiwi to sit in the stands at Aaron’s sentencing?

I hope so. But if someone is attending, don’t announce your plans. Give no reason for anyone to suspect a 'farmer is present. Blend in as if you were part of the court staff.
Also, Useful_Mistake is looking to buy a transcript and mentioned the last one cost $160. Send them a DM if you’re able to contribute.

 

[Hellion]

Does Aaron get to explain to the court when he makes his plea that he’s very sorry he shared the photo with another person; that he didn’t mean it maliciously and at the time he had the reasonable belief it couldnt be harmful due to the fact she was a publicly documented polyamorous exhibitionist who posed nude for him to photograph, and she freely shared photos of herself in multiple different group chats in the past. Again he is sorry for any harm caused and now understands that even if someone regularly shares nude photos of themselves to strangers on the internet it doesn’t mean he gets to decide to share it with a singular extra person.

 

[Goku 1000000 O]

You forgot watching STMS from start to finish.

I wonder, is that a greater masochism than the Balldo?

 

[DiabeticSydePhil]

Does Aaron get to explain to the court when he makes his plea that he’s very sorry he shared the photo with another person; that he didn’t mean it maliciously and at the time he had the reasonable belief it couldnt be harmful due to the fact she was a publicly documented polyamorous exhibitionist who posed nude for him to photograph, and she freely shared photos of herself in multiple different group chats in the past. Again he is sorry for any harm caused and now understands that even if someone regularly shares nude photos of themselves to strangers on the internet it doesn’t mean he gets to decide to share it with a singular extra person.

One would assume this already factored into the $50 plea, but I don't really know why they're bothering with the victim statement anyways since its already an agreed plea.

But if Kayla gets to give a statement, he should too? It might backfire depending on how well she does crocodile tears (not well, I assume). A zombie crack whore and her disheveled skeleton husband probably don't make a great case.

 

[Intrusive Thinker]

This is is a threat. Aaron, stop looking at the lake from your parent's lake home whilst thinking about God or love or life or whatever. You can do that LATER. You better be armed and ready for battle on Wednesday. Rekieta may be an injured soldier but he's going to battle on Wednesday and is (apparently) filing a civil suit against you on the heels of it. This is not a subtle message.

FOCUS - file a civil suit right back, at the very least.

Assuming Nick files suit on Wednesday if the case against Aaron is complete, who is the lawyer? Can't be Nick. Randazza is the wrong choice, and expensive. Would it be someone from the "Barneswalker" office?

Will these cases be sealed since they are in MN, and deal with delicate subjectmatter? Will transcripts be available?
Aaron better start preparing for this, the sooner the better. If not a civil suit, how about getting a restraining order in place - get the paperwork started before Wednesday. Wouldnt that make it so Kayla would have to face Aaron in court without Nick? Or is there something about courthouses that gets around restraining orders like holy ground for the highlander?

Something else that would have been great but is probably too late - a better letter of support for the hearing on Wednesday. Most people can get their mom to write one. What Aaron needs is a letter from someone special. Someone who is loved and respected, an upstanding member of their local community who puts in the work to make the small town a better place. Thats right - I am talking about... Dan Sletta. He could talk about how much Aaron tried to save Kayla, how he has grown so much in the past year, etc... dream on, I know. C'mon, it would be hilarious.

 

[LiquidKid]

Assuming Nick files suit on Wednesday if the case against Aaron is complete, who is the lawyer? Can't be Nick. Randazza is the wrong choice, and expensive. Would it be someone from the "Barneswalker" office?

Will these cases be sealed since they are in MN, and deal with delicate subjectmatter? Will transcripts be available?
Aaron better start preparing for this, the sooner the better. If not a civil suit, how about getting a restraining order in place - get the paperwork started before Wednesday. Wouldnt that make it so Kayla would have to face Aaron in court without Nick? Or is there something about courthouses that gets around restraining orders like holy ground for the highlander?

Something else that would have been great but is probably too late - a better letter of support for the hearing on Wednesday. Most people can get their mom to write one. What Aaron needs is a letter from someone special. Someone who is loved and respected, an upstanding member of their local community who puts in the work to make the small town a better place. Thats right - I am talking about... Dan Sletta. He could talk about how much Aaron tried to save Kayla, how he has grown so much in the past year, etc... dream on, I know. C'mon, it would be hilarious.

Here’s what I’m a little iffy on.
If Nick’s plan is to file a civil suit, wouldn’t he need to formally serve the papers? Couldn’t Aaron just have security to keep anyone from Nick’s side away from him, and thus prevent any serving?

 

[Sneed Force One]

Here’s what I’m a little iffy on.
If Nick’s plan is to file a civil suit, wouldn’t he need to formally serve the papers? Couldn’t Aaron just have security to keep anyone from Nick’s side away from him, and thus prevent any serving?

He'll just send a process server to his house. Its pretty unavoidable unless Aaron skips town without his kids.