Containment What If?

[The Dude]

Chris as a real Jerkop with a sidearm and everything. Go.

 

[Bob's Fries]

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

Capped knees.

 

[exball]

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

Capped knees.

Everything about the anatomy in this is wrong.

 

[Sakamoto]

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

He would make Barney Fife look like Sgt. Joe Friday in comparison.

 

[PacSol]

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

Dirty Crapped Patrol Car?

Realistically, he'd never make it. He'd never be able to pass the obstacle course, the written test would be beyond him, he'd never make it past interviews or his physical, a background check would turn up all sorts of red flags, and he'd drive his psychological examiner nuts.

 

[Watcher]

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

The only way I can imagine Chrissy being a cop is if Bob was the chief of Police.

Then he'd easily make it in, and he'd act like an asshole to everyone. As a sort of retribution for being bullied in high school. The power would go to his head and he would eagerly beat homos with his nightstick.

Though it's been mentioned before that he'd flunk out in any other situation. It'd be a lot more realistic for him to become a prison guard or a security guard. Both are significantly easier to become in comparison.

 

[The Dude]

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

The only way I can imagine Chrissy being a cop is if Bob was the chief of Police.

Then he'd easily make it in, and he'd act like an asshole to everyone. As a sort of retribution for being bullied in high school. The power would go to his head and he would eagerly beat homos with his nightstick.

Though it's been mentioned before that he'd flunk out in any other situation. It'd be a lot more realistic for him to become a prison guard or a security guard. Both are significantly easier to become in comparison.

Prison guards have to go through the same prerequisites as any other LEO. Also it wouldn't matter if his father was the chief of police. If he was a sheriff that would be different because he could be deputized.

 

[SodomyRocket]

Crooked or not, it would actually be an improvement on Son-Chu. Of course, the money saved by making your own spoiler out of cheap lumber could be used for a regular tune-up...oh wait, there's vidya to be bought.

how the hell is the an improvement?

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

He would try to arrest all the trolls. maybe even shot him self with his side arm.
imagining Chris with a gun makes me

 

[SlowInTheMinds]

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

He'd arrest all boyfriends of girls fitting his norms, then he assumes that since their boyfriend is in jail they will gladly have sex with him.

Power might be hot, but CWC would easily balance it out by being a creep.

 

[Some JERK]

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

The other officers/deputies would troll the shit out of him. If he was a deputy, and if he made it to his jail rotation, He'd get owned by someone during intake.

also this:

Spoiler

 

[Sakamoto]

Are you telling me that something as simple as this would be too much work?

Yes, that involved using a saw, screwdriver, drill, wrench, and varnish. Now if it were made of Legos or construction paper and held on with duct tape, maybe.

 

[Some JERK]

Chris would probably drive a Honda Civic and it would look like this but with more Sonichu crap on it. Then Chris would complain that the cops are trolls for arresting him for street racing. He also would get banned from car events for acting like an ass. I am still shocked this did not happen. The import scene in the 90's and early 2000's was huge in the US. Also the first Fast and the Furious movie came out at around the time Chris was 19. Also Bob seemed like a car enthusiast to because he had a Z3 with a manual transmission. I guess it is for the better because I could not imagine Chris driving a car quickly and having it end well.

Why the hell would you need down-force on the rear-end of a front wheel drive?

 

[Duke Nukem]

Crooked or not, it would actually be an improvement on Son-Chu. Of course, the money saved by making your own spoiler out of cheap lumber could be used for a regular tune-up...oh wait, there's vidya to be bought.

how the hell is the an improvement?

Because Son-Chu is a fucking wreck, no doubt. Absolutely no maintenance whatsoever has been done to it since 1993.

 

[SodomyRocket]

Crooked or not, it would actually be an improvement on Son-Chu. Of course, the money saved by making your own spoiler out of cheap lumber could be used for a regular tune-up...oh wait, there's vidya to be bought.

how the hell is the an improvement?

Because Son-Chu is a fucking wreck, no doubt. Absolutely no maintenance whatsoever has been done to it since 1993.

hes already backed into cars there is no reason putting wood in front of the rear window is a good idea.

 

[Duke Nukem]

Doesn't stop other ricers from doing the same thing.

 

[José Mourinho]

What about Yu-Gu-Oh? I know it premiered in the US in the early 00's but It also included a cardgame and the show was dumb and repetitive enough that I think Chris would enjoy it. I think Chris would dislike Digimon changing characters every season. One of the things I suspect he enjoys of Pokémon is how static and simplistic the plot is.

I can imagine Chris making a Yu-Gi-Oh fancomic full of crossovers now.

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

He would try to arrest the trolls, but couldn't do it because he would spend most of his life still eating McDonalds.

 

[Pikonic]

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

Internal Affairs would be up his ass faster than a dildo.

 

[CatParty]

 

[pickles]

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

He'd accept bribes in the form of PSN credits.

 

[derpi]

Re: What if Chris was a real honest to GodBear police office

He'd live at doughnut shops instead of mcdonalds.
Criminals would bribe their way out of being arrested by buying him hungry man dinners.
He would arrest all the workers at his nearest factory