Containment What If?

[Doge]

He would beat me up.

http://sonichu.com/cwcki/Don%27t_Mess_With_Me

 

[exball]

 

[blackie toy]

http://www.ehow.com/info_8581945_illegal-pictures-people-permission.html I'd like to find a harder justification than this, but I'm pretty sure that CWC was interfering with Snyder's attempt to run a business. It's a civil tort, but it's also the case for kicking someone out like CWC out of a business.

Cops can't arrest you for committing torts unless the tort is also a crime (in which case they arrest you for the crime). At common law, trespassing was not criminal. In Virginia, the rule of law hinges on permission to enter, which is a very fluid concept. Being told to leave and not come back is usually pretty definitive, but as I suggest, that Snyder's bans were evidently historically revocable may have given Chris a defense. Anyway, Snyder doesn't need much of a justification for renewing his orders to Chris to leave: as a business owner, he has fairly broad rights to deny services to people or command them to leave his property.

I'm also not sure "interfering with Snyder's attempt to run a business" is the tort you're looking for. It's just the tort of trespass. You can get actual and potentially punitive damages. One of those "old chestnuts" (though not really that old) dealing with this would be Jacque v. Steenberg Homes, Inc., 563 N.W.2d 154 (Wis. 1997). In Jacque, the defendant couldn't easily get to land to install a mobile home without crossing the plaintiff's land. So they did despite their (illogical) refusal to allow them to do so. The plaintiffs proved (and likely sustained) no actual damages; all that happened was the defendants had plowed through the plaintiffs' snow-covered land. Still, the trial court awarded $100K in punitive damages, in part due to the defendant's callous and reckless disregard for the plaintiff's property rights.

Anyway, as to the arrest, while it's probably true that an arrest could have taken place, there's just something inherently different about trespass to a place open to the public after being told to leave. It just doesn't sit right to allow the business owner to both want the person gone and want to detain the person. You tell the guy to leave, and he leaves. He comes back, you tell him "You're not supposed to be here." He leaves: why would you pursue him over the trespass? Now, suppose he comes yet again... then it's getting silly, and it's likely that Chris's behavior was reaching that point. But, on the other hand, there's the case of Swanson v. Horseshoe Hammond, LLC, where a woman voluntarily self-excluded herself from going to a casino, then kept coming back; ultimately she was detained by security and handed over to the local police. Charges were dropped, but the 7th Circuit later held that the detention by casino security (or citizen's arrest; I'm not sure whether it was merely a detention or an actual arrest) was constitutionally valid. Swanson v. Horseshoe Hammond, LLC, 445 Fed. App'x 868 (7th Cir. 2011). So maybe I'm dead wrong on the right to detain him until the cops arrived, but I still think I'm on the money as to the most reasonable course of action (restraining order, possibly civil suit for some amount of damages). Blocking a car with your body, even if the injuries you sustain from the dumbass driver ramming into you anyway are on said dumbass driver, is not a good life decision.

 

[José Mourinho]

The Classic Chris.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

I work in a busy department of a large city hospital , and in all honesty, someone as bizarre as Chris wouldn't stand out that much. We're right next to the mental health section and I think people would just assume he'd wandered in from there. In all honesty, Chris would probably hate it more than we would. He'd find it stressful, lacking in boyfriend-free girls and a bit too ethnically diverse.

That being said, one of the clinics we run is for diabetic patients, so if he was in London, he'd almost certainly end up there eventually.

First and foremost, if Chris is going to look good then he needs to improve his diet. Not necessarily lose all the weight, though that would be good, but enough to have him declassified from "fatass" to "a bit chubby." Improving the diet would also take care of his complexion, which is the other major problem. He'd also need to get out and about a bit to improve his muscle tone and stamina and get rid of that pasty whiteness. Then he'd need to be educated, Clockwork Orange style if necessary, on the basics of hygiene. Clothes and a haircut can only go so far if the person in them is a smelly, greasy tub of lard who hasn't changed in a week and can't walk a hundred yards without taking a break.

That being done, I'd destroy all his old clothes, because knowing Chris, he'd probably go back to them the moment I left otherwise. Chris being Chris and therefore lazy, a low-maintenance look is the thing. So a simple, short haircut, something that's easy to keep in trim. Clothes-wise, long sleeves would be a definite, and fairly plain in dark colours. I think button-down shirts would be the thing, maybe some plain T-shirts for lounging around the house. A sports jacket in black would be good for going out. At the very least, getting clothes that fit would be a good start.

I actually think that while Chris will never be the gorgeous hunk of manhood he thinks he is, if he put in some effort then he could actually look alright.

 

[Jewelsmakerguy]

anyway who says they didn't? it's just that chris' parents insisted on mainstreaming and keeping him out of stuff that could be beneficial to his development, instead choosing to instill their own shitty values

Well said Altissimo, couldn't have said it better myself.

Then again, I spent most of my education (until high school) in special ed. classes.

 

[CatParty]

chris would still be the kid in the corner facing the wall during the pizza parties...

 

[Jewelsmakerguy]

Where I work, I'm surrounded by other people with autism. So if he came to where I worked, I'd expect him to call them "windows to hell"; complain constantly to my supervisors about working with said "windows" and not actually accomplish anything (and since my job consists of manufacturing jewelry for public consumption, that's a bad thing). Leaving yours truly to pick up the slack that he'd leave behind.

On the plus side, it means more money for me.

chris would still be the kid in the corner facing the wall during the pizza parties...

Honestly, I would have put Chris as that guy who makes even the other Autists think he's crazy.

I say that because I know/knew some people like that.

 

[hellbound]

He would not be able to access the building.

Without a key card, he wouldn't be able to get into our facility except through the receptionist. I'm pretty sure he wouldn't be able to convince her he has business there.

Assuming he did, he may begin searching our vast amounts of freezers and refrigerators for food, but would be quickly disappointed to find nothing but serum, urine, and chemical reagents.

He would then be yelled most Hurtingly at by our JERK health and safety officer and probably removed by the JERKops.

 

[Some JERK]

I spent most of my education (until high school) in special ed. classes.

What was that like? Did it help you when you got into high school? How active a role did your parents take in supporting/supplementing things you were learning in those classes at home?

 

[PopOfColor]

chris would still be the kid in the corner facing the wall during the pizza parties...

Honestly, I would have put Chris as that guy who makes even the other Autists think he's crazy.

I say that because I know/knew some people like that.

I have ADD/HD and went to school in the 80's so I was in and out of LD classes and I recall ever the very slow kids making fun of the one kid in class who would stab the shit out of the desk with his pen.

 

[Jewelsmakerguy]

chris would still be the kid in the corner facing the wall during the pizza parties...

Honestly, I would have put Chris as that guy who makes even the other Autists think he's crazy.

I say that because I know/knew some people like that.

I have ADD/HD and went to school in the 80's so I was in and out of LD classes and I recall ever the very slow kids making fun of the one kid in class who would stab the shit out of the desk with his pen.

Well I had this guy who believed that Beyblades could really unleash a holographic monster. Without a bit chip. He also claimed to have an actual Medabot (remember those?) at his house (I had a small model kit). I went along with it just to humor him, and when he left, went back to doing other things.

That's how I see Chris being treated: the others just play along and once he's gone, they just go back to doing their own thing.

 

[An Ounce of Vagina]

Any benefit would be undone by Borb, and they would encourage him to mistreat the other autistics since they were obviously inferior to their perfect child.

 

[CrusaderKing]

Chris in the military would be more like "No Time for Sergeants" without the bumbling hick actually doing stuff right.

Chris would totally make the toilets stand at attention when his officers came in for inspection.

I would guess that he might try to do something like that, rigging up a bunch of strings and the like. But then it would get too hard for him to do and he would

 

[Mickey Rat]

A straight jacket. And a matching one for Barb.

 

[Batman]

http://instantrimshot.com/

 

[Mickey Rat]

Re: What if ... Taylor Swift dated Our Pet Lolcow?

And I said
Sonichu take me
Somewhere you can thunderbolt
I'll be hating
Every time Barb grunts and moans
You be the bitch
Cause I'm mayor of CWCville
It's a Chris story
Baby just JULAY

Shit. I just realized it could have been a STAY STRAIGHT jacket.

 

[LordCustos3]

That being done, I'd destroy all his old clothes, because knowing Chris, he'd probably go back to them the moment I left otherwise.

Keurig beat you to it.

Anyhow, I always kinda liked how The Gay Trucker look made Chris look like he was halfway to being Cholo. He should go all the way with that. While Chris'tard has -87% chance to get laid, his Latin Loverboy Cosplay Persona "Carlos Chantor" has a 0.6% chance to get laid.

 

[A-Stump]

I'd have him dress in camo, everywhere, because in Virginia you can be a fat misogynistic smelly retard and get women as long as you wear camo.

In Ohio, too...regrettably.

 

[Grand Number of Pounds]

Shave his head and put him in a leather jacket and chaps.

I wanna see Chris try to ride a motorcycle.