Masturbation Thread - The holy act of sinning

[Y2K Baby]

I love the Lord, not my own body.

 

[Sanic]

Masturbation is amoral and should be banned by the government. It corrupts young children and turns them into school shooters.

 

[The Great Chandler]

Reddit.

 

[Hell0]

everytime i jerk it i feel disgusting and then spend the next hour being introspective and listening to elliot smith

 

[William]

I use my nondominant hand.

 

[AnOminous]

I love the Lord, not my own body.

Jihad on you! Jihad, you fucking dancing baby!

Anyone with a dancing baby as an avatar is evil.

everytime i jerk it i feel disgusting and then spend the next hour being introspective and listening to elliot smith

Listening to Elliott Smith is a sign of a penitent person. You are well on the way to being a saint.

 

[MrTroll]

I love the Lord, not my own body.

The Bible says the body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. What kind of sick fuck would masturbate in a temple? Especially one belonging to the Holy Spirit?

 

[m0rnutz]

If any of you are deviant enough, you can buy a life-sized silicone realistic sex toy for half a kilo off Amazon.

Spoiler: One of you would enjoy this look

 

[Y2K Baby]

Jihad on you! Jihad, you fucking dancing baby!

Anyone with a dancing baby as an avatar is evil.

I change avatar now to troll.

Jihad on you! Jihad, you fucking dancing baby!

Anyone with a dancing baby as an avatar is evil.

Gotcha', idiot.

No wonder my Bible thumper friend is always an inch away from a mental breakdown. That guy needs to fap.

But he humps Bible already, idiot.

 

[Clintonberg]

I use my left hand with its thumb extended out and pointing down because not only do I disapprove of my lifestyle choices but I'm also unable to take control of the situation and stop myself from making them.

I also need to pay close attention to the head because I'm cut and that's the only part of my penis that has any remaining feeling.

 

[Blender]

I have 8 different dildos in my drawer. Guess how many I use everyday.

 

[Boxed in Lurker]

At night. Bathtub full of bubbles and water. Candles being the only light. Rose petals scattered around. Glass of wine in one hand, book full of nothing but vore in the other.

 

[Lackadaisy]

I have 8 different dildos in my drawer. Guess how many I use everyday.

0

 

[Johnny Bravo]

If God didn't want us to masturbate why did He give us hands?

 

[Jewelsmakerguy]

You don't need masturbation when you have Jesus.

But what if Jesus masturbated?

If God didn't want us to masturbate why did He give us hands?

More importantly, why did he give us genitals?

 

[Ruin]

I masturbate anally using the tears of neighborhood children as lube while choking myself with my free hand.

 

[MerriedxReldnahc]

I always make sure to have plenty of lubricant on hand, this is a good brand.

 

[Dolphin Lundgren]

I prefer sex to masturbation. So tbh I don't do it much.

 

[rabbitgay]

actually im on antidepressants

 

[Dolphin Lundgren]

Antidepressants pretty much kill a sex drive. :/