🐮 Lolcow John Sakars - What a faggot lol

[Mr Pizza]

He's like a bad guy on King of the Hill. I saw the don't insult people with animal names before and was kind of impressed vegans could push something sort of funny out of their malnourished brain-nuggets. The rest of this stuff is just gold.

 

[Jaiman]

Classic.

 

[4Macie]

Why do lolcows make videos about their vagina-eating abilities when they haven't actually performed the act itself? I'm not sure who did it worse, this guy or Chris.

 

[VJ 120]

His music is bad and his videos are trainwrecks, but I kinda like the guy. He's pure lolcow. Not horrorcow or rat king with a long-ass backstory. Just a nice, wholesome cow the whole website can enjoy.

 

[glutenfreebooty]

Rival incoming, Kengle.

Spoiler: the fine art of John Sakars

 

[Sinner's Sandwich]

He's a grade A lyricist.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=-jrx-Xrrsco
Is Sakars insanely delusional about how attractive he is, or does going vegan make you so retarded that you'd willingly sleep with someone like him?

Who said he sleeps with humans?

 

[Catalyst Cube]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=s9osOqVbDX4I'm actually at a loss

About one minute in a dog shows up and starts barking at him and the clueless background dancer. Even the animals want him to shut up.

 

[wenttobermuda]

While I'll admit this charming man isn't necessarily representative of all vegans, he is the most perfect vegan ever. What a cringey, plant eating pussy.

 

[heyyaawww]

I feel like he's the kind of person that waits outside of women's prisons at the end of the month when they let prisoners out.

No way, they serve meat in prison. Evil carnists!

 

[HG 400]

While I'll admit this charming man isn't necessarily representative of all vegans

Yes he is.

 

[Absinthe]

Wow. I thought I knew what desperate was. Then I watched this guy's videos.

 

[wenttobermuda]

Yes he is.

Aw hell you Abo hag, you're right and I'm all humbled and trembling.

 

[HG 400]

Aw hell you Abo hag, you're right and I'm all humbled and trembling.

And now I dox your children as an afterthought.

 

[Obviously Snape]

How is this thread dead, this guy is a goldmine! One of my fave lolcows because he has to sexualize most of his videos (often tied to licking) no matter how irrelevant the topic - which doesn't seem to pay off as I've never seen him with a significant other.

My old favorites weren't in this thread

Spoiler: Chicken pussy droppings (I don't eat your periods)

Spoiler: Don't insult

Fresh tism straight from Sakars' teet below

Spoiler: Sakars makes Satan a song because he's just misunderstood and thinks he should go vegan then plays the track in reverse for hidden messages

Thought we got lucky here and found out Sakars fucks animals but it turns out he's admitting he's his own best friend and has to masturbate because of it

Spoiler: I make love to my best friend

Here John reveals his fundamentally broken hippie understanding of what having a job is. "Profit is the unpaid labour of the working class". Sakars can't seem to understand that despite people not having made the computers they use, planes they fly on, the buildings they live in or the clothes they wear that they paid for those goods by receiving paychecks from their employers for which their work generated company profit. They did this amazingly enough by utilizing the tools people that came before them generated for their employers and their own profit. Ref video "capitalism is a nightmare" for more deep insights.

Spoiler: There's no such thing as a 'self-made' man

Spoiler: ASMR where John takes out his removable tooth and starts licking it

Spoiler: Homework should be banned because we work like super duper hard during the day at school and need more time for fun and activism

And here he is e-begging for a front-tooth implant to replace the falsie he takes out during his vegan pussy-eating videos. I seriously doubt this individual knows what real-life quim tastes like.

It's good to know that after 2 and a half years he still hasn't reached his goal. The more recent ASMR video above has him licking the same falsie.

Spoiler: Ballsakarse

 

[JambledUpWords]

What happens

• You get to listen to another new song
• John rants about how capitalism is bad
• John says money is useless
• Claims that if capitalism were abolished, that everyone would have more free time and be healthier
• Not so subtly encourages people to go vegan

 

[Obviously Snape]

>money is fuckin useless

>has GoFundMe

Sounds about right for John. Go Vegan.

 

[drtoboggan]

Not sure why he got neutered. His personality is a great contraceptive.

 

[JambledUpWords]

John is on a mission to ban balloons now. Keep in mind, he also wants to get rid of all guns

I’d like to see John try and make legislation against balloons where he lives, it would be entertaining to watch someone do that

 

[Obviously Snape]

John gets naked and tucks it back while hanging from the ceiling in this wonderful art piece

 

[JambledUpWords]

John gets naked and tucks it back while hanging from the ceiling in this wonderful art piece

https://youtube.com/watch?v=zLPF__Czrso

He’s trying to become one with the animal, which means wearing no clothes (for realism)

John brought back the cow costume to sing a song of why we can’t have delicious milk from cows. Song is very grating, I could only last about 30 seconds. Godspeed to anyone who can make it longer.

Islamic Conent:

• John sings about why milk is bad
• He’s in a cow costume doing a LARP of a cow
• As a cow, John gets #MeToo by a farmer
• Cow John has a baby
• Baby is taken away for veal
• Cow John tries his best to sound in pain, ends up singing like he’s constipated
• More constipated singing
• Cow John is milked for three more years
• Cow John dies, but not before flipping everyone off