How do I get maidens on my dick?

[Agent Abe Caprine]

Maidenless. Help!

 

[Red Hood]

Art thou seeking a suitor-free maiden?

Make thee yon sign, or perhaps a jerkin upon which is written "Desire Maiden!"

 

[Testacles Maximus]

Pay them.

 

[Exigent Circumcisions]

Pay them.

That's a one-time investment.

 

[Testacles Maximus]

That's a one-time investment.

Several if they do their job worth a damn.

 

[Exigent Circumcisions]

Several if they do their job worth a damn.

Teach a man to whore, his dick will be wet for a day. Counsel him to buy a revolver and his dick will be wet forever.

 

[SandyCat]

Gotta slay a dragon

 

[Zero Day Defense]

Well, you need to get a dick to start.

 

[Retink]

Maidens love a man with a big sword.