How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

  • 🇵🇦 Nuestro primer dominio localizado está en español en kiwifarms.pa. Our first localized domain is on Spanish on kiwifarms.pa.
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I'm gonna chill out with some close friends for a few weeks while I deal with the psychological fallout from the job loss. I hate how just when things seem to be starting to go well for me something comes out of left field and sets me back again.
 
I'm more than a little stressed. I have until Monday to decide if I want to take a fulltime permanent job or not. The job itself is okay, I'd probably be reasonably happy with it, but I'd be switching from a rather bohemian lifestyle to settling down in a small town where I'll live by myself and probably never have time off to visit my family or friends. I expect it to be a very lonely and somewhat boring existence and I worry what I would do if I ever lost the job. Also if I refuse the job I'll basically ice myself out of that company for at least a year.

Not that I have many prospects if I don't take it. Taking care of my elderly boomer relatives and maybe try to go back to school, or at least take some classes?
 
Not well. This year has been the worst for almost everyone but I thought I finally found a little light and relief from it in a new wonderful friend that I felt more strongly for than just friendship.

And now I haven't heard anything from her in 2+ months now and I'm both upset, heartbroken, and desperate to find out what. Did something happen, is it me, is it ghosting, or is she rotting in the ground? Enough to drive anyone crazy, man. So now the year is right on track to be the shitshow it was always destined to.

I'm a very proactive person; sitting and waiting and hoping isn't my style; I have to fix what is wrong and there's nothing I can do. Literally nothing. How can anyone move on too when it's so uncertain? I hate this. Every single day.
And the year is only going to get worse the closer it gets to November. I can honestly say I'd rather be dead right now that have to absorb all this bullshit day after day with no relief, alone.
 
Found out I have a staph infection in my kidneys and didn't find out until yesterday after taking the wrong meds for a week. Now I'm stuck in bed another week.
 
I kept eating habanero flavor chips today and now my tummy hurts
 
Pros:
Feeling as good as ever. The Hollywood disaster plague movie has not affected my life much.

Cons:
Watching a new totalitarian dark age unfold, but people always happily sleepwalk into this shit.
 
My house got robbed.
Now, I guess I should be worried, but the robbers couldn't get past the second door (I just forgot to lock the first one), and they decided to take TWO (one empty and one partially used) GAS CYLINDERS AND A PAIR OF JEANS THAT I FORGOT TO TAKE IN????????

Holy shit. I've been laughing all day. I both hate and love retarded junkie thieves lmfao. It's all so fucking stupid. The best part is that I'll probably know who it was by the end of the day. :story:
 
SoylentGreen powiedział(a):
i'm doing terribly

have you seen how many niggers there are
Kliknij, aby rozwinąć...
Try harder, barely even bait. Also, you're a Britbong, so "hardly fucking any" would be the answer.

On topic; pretty good. Fixed my laptop with minimal soldering, resurrected my SNES with a new power socket and finally worked out how to get my wireless display working over the network.
 
I'm doing pretty damn good. Got a job interview in a few days that will substantially increase my take home pay if I get it. (To the point where, if interest rates remain steady, I'll probably buy a nicer and larger house by the end of the year.)

The Mrs. is happy and doing what she loves. We're seriously considering kids at this point.

Compared to my early 20's life is great. I've gone from near suicidal depression thanks to unemployment and being in debt to gainfully employed, happily married, with no debt. I've worked my ass off and I'm finally starting to seriously reep the benefits.

I remain extremely humble about it. I made my hard choices and realized I needed to make myself better. I cut some really toxic "friends" out of my life several years back who I notice are all still miserable, under/unemployed, and boardline forever alone. I easily could still be in a downward spiral like them.

Tldr: If you're in a bad place, don't forget you can make your future a better one. It's your choice.
 
Ostatnio edytowane:
Finally got some "totally alone" time, much needed and appreciated. Caught up on a bunch of videos I wanted to watch, exercised and making lunch soon
 
Had an unexpected day off from work, allowing me time to finish sowing my oat crop *just* as the rain began.

I love it when a plan comes together.
 
I'm kinda annoyed; for some reason I've been having trouble reaching orgasms, alone or with a partner doesn't matter. Not that it's the goal of sex necessarily or anything but since it is expected of men to jizz somewhat easily I get that my partner gets a bit frustrated, feeling she isn't good enough etc, although we have talked about it and she seems to understand.

Might be a side effect of meds and they aren't even SSRI/SNRI shit, just pregabalin.
 
Out of nowhere the other day I saw a magnet on the fridge that an old childhood friend of mine that I haven't seen in ages is getting married next year. Considering I was rather close to this person growing up (and had a crush on once the ol' birds and bees came knocking), it's rather solemn news in a way...

It's also made my utter lack of accomplishments in life rear its ugly head once again. That feeling of seeing people you grew up with going out there and making something of their lives while you've essentially remained stagnant with little to show in terms of progress.

Oh, and the 2020 shitshow and subsequent creeping of hopeless despair for the future is still wailing away at my psyche.

But hey I got a pet snake recently and I don't live anywhere near the burning inferno that is the west coast so, life at least isn't 100% awful. :)
 
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