How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

  • 🇵🇦 Nuestro primer dominio localizado está en español en kiwifarms.pa. Our first localized domain is on Spanish on kiwifarms.pa.
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neverendingmidi powiedział(a):
Got a fresh work coat from the uniform company. Don’t know what they wash it in, but I’m now fighting a livid, blistering rash on my arms. It seems to calm down through the day, then start up again at night. I have been to a doctor, and I’m taking meds, but it doesn’t seem to be calming it down as much as I expected.
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As an update, I think it's healing, but so fucking slowly. I just want it gone, and to be able to sleep a whole night without waking up realizing I'm scratching, and having to get a cold pack to calm it down enough again to go back to sleep. I think the bigger welts are starting to scab over at least.
 
One of my inlaws got laid off from his oilfield job and decided to shoot his face off. It really made me angry. I'm at a very happy time in my life. I hope it lasts, but I do personally sympathize with Kiwis in despair. I've been there.

So rather than moralfag about a weak relative, maybe I'll just share a poem I learned by heart when I was a kid, from which I've often drawn strength.

If you strike a thorn or rose
Keep a goin!
If it hails or if it snows
Keep a goin!
Tain't no use to sit and whine
When the fish ain't on your line
Bait your hook and keep a tryin
Keep a goin

When the weather kills your crop
Keep a goin!
If you stumble from the top
Keep a goin!
S'pose you're out of every dime
Bein' broke ain't any crime
Tell the world you're feeling prime!
Keep a goin!

When it seems that all is up
Keep a goin
Drain the sweetness from the cup
Keep a goin!
See the wild birds on the wing
Hear the bells that sweetly ring
When you feel like crying, sing!
Keep a goin!
 
I've nearly reached my cutting weight goal and have accumulated enough protein powder to sculpt a wheyfu out of. The last time I tried exercising regularly it only lasted for about two weeks, but I'm feeling more motivated this time 'round. So, yah, that's all I have going on atm.
 
I got a job interview with the fire department. It's not good money, but it's civil service, and if I do it long enough for Coof to blow over I'll have the experience to go FD anywhere in the country. Fingers crossed.
 
Update. Fire department interview went as expected. FD chief is great friends with my grandfather, and would not shut up about it, started asking me all kinds of uncomfortable questions while I sat there and lied through my teeth pretending to like him or my grandfather. Came home, got chewed out for 'not doing my part' even though i literally drove from my house all the way out to Hammond to get a job that I don't want and wouldn't be good at. I'm miserable to the point where I keep my guns unloaded and the bullets in a strongbox because if both my guns and my bullets are within close proximity to me, I don't trust myself not to do something extremely stupid the next time I get my ass dragged for three hours.

I'm still looking for a way out. I have a few leads, but most of my 'friends' aren't taking this seriously and say 'just leave bro start over somewhere else', as if it's that fucking easy. The only real concrete stuff I have is all the way up in fucking Juneau.

I'm not the e-begging type but if y'all know any good businesses in metro areas near y'all that are hiring, I will literally do just about anything. Just get me the fuck away from here.
 
Ostatnio edytowane:
I am less depressed than I was the last few months when I was working exclusively from home. I still wish COVID was not a thing, since I used to hit both the gym and the cinema several times a week and I really miss those activities.
 
Today has fucking ruled. I don't want to piss on anyone's plate if they've had a bad one but today felt like taking on a literal avatar of depression, kicking its bitch ass and tossing it out onto the street. I know, it's a pendulum but I'll be damned if I'm not gonna enjoy an upswing as rare as this. I'm still worried about people who are having a hard time right now, especially the ones too far away for me to help, and I'm sure work is gonna suck mammoth dong tomorrow or the ex wife will attempt to rain thin shit all over my day, but right now? Shit is g o l d e n.
 
I'm getting things done, but I feel so damn tired. Don't want to watch movies or animu anymore, and just don't want to game either. Just work and you tube videos and casting spells making mushrooms wearing sombreros with a German accent as strong as One Punch Man.
 
The Fresno Nightcrawler powiedział(a):
not doing good. the most important person in my life broke it off with me yesterday. i haven't slept or eaten since. i'm trying really hard to not send her anything, i don't want to be the clingy ex. give me your strength bros, i need it.
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The most important person in your life is you!
Sorry about the heartbreak bud, time heals all and don't underestimate how powerful a good nights rest can be.
Try not to let your heart turn cold, and make yourself a better version of you. Not for anyone else but you, Working out is what really got my head out of darkness but morning the loss of a relationship is normal and to your brain no different than if somebody passed away.
Be happy you have the time you spend did together, looking back I think God I didn't end up getting the things I thought I wanted when I was younger. I will say any time you break this no contact it will rip that wound right back open and you have to start that process over again.

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I started 2020 fired from Chick fil a aka the best place you can work when it comes to fast food jobs all because I couldn't stop using earbuds when I washed dishes (yes we had them cooking pans flour bind and kitchen tools and equipment) then was unemployed for like three weeks


I got back on the workforce fairly quick got a nice job washing dishes again this time at a bar downtown, but...get this I mentioned to some co workers about maybe maybe getting a second job at AMC (this was before covid shut down the movie theaters) it got me fired from that job I still call bs on it too but it is what it is. Wasn't worth it anyway I'm fairly sure the owner was a troon.

I didn't get that AMC job either so it was almost like adding insult to injury, desperate for some kinda break I took a job in a steak house again washing dishes but also loading deliveries of food every morning...hated that job so much for so many reasons the least of which is everyone I worked with save one guy spoke only Spanish, which made them all very difficult to work with.

I finally seem to have gotten a break...been working at KFC almost two or three months and it pays well. Getting plenty of hour's but I haven't had a day off on almost a month at this point. Still I was looking forward to 2020 everything felt like it was finally right with the world but as the saying goes..
Pride cometh before the fall four months left of this wretched year
 
I seem to have replaced eating with online shopping, which is uh, not good. I haven't completely fucked myself over yet but i can see the snowball rolling.
 
I had the busiest Fucking week ever. I have a huge project due soon, family event, hosting a lot of guests, farming, and was out with my boyfriend yesterday. We watched kill bill and he thinks Tarantino’s style is so hilariously over the top. Life’s dare I say going aight but I am T I R E D
 
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