How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

  • 🇵🇦 Nuestro primer dominio localizado está en español en kiwifarms.pa. Our first localized domain is on Spanish on kiwifarms.pa.
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I don’t know how but I’m now on Russian Pug Tiktok

And I now own a rebadged Daewoo, I just need to get insurance sorted out before the dealership will give me the keys but the insurance company is closed today
 
i cannot make heads or tails of the damn thing
Do you know anyone else who does hand spinning or weaving? A little friendly coaching can go a long way. See if you can find a local-ish group that does this sort of thing. Much depends on what you are hoping to work toward - finished whole cloth? There are people who happily geek out about all the steps in the process, you just need to find them.
 
Do you know anyone else who does hand spinning or weaving? A little friendly coaching can go a long way. See if you can find a local-ish group that does this sort of thing. Much depends on what you are hoping to work toward - finished whole cloth? There are people who happily geek out about all the steps in the process, you just need to find them.
its incredible, really...like 5 minutes after posting that...it all came together!
i dont know ANYONE who is interested in this at all, here..its just me. i mean...there is a local group, but its populated by some of the biggest like elitist assholes ive ever seen in my life.

im starting to think there are elitists in almost every niche, really. but what im trying to do is make this shawl that apparently can be wrought from one cone of cotton yarn, and so far, now that it all started to make sense, the warping process is going much smoother :lol:
i will also say that i didnt know that the initial set up would require like 7 feet of space either, but thats fine.
 
My sweet little Baby Bean went to Heaven today 🩷🤍❤️

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I knew this was coming. She took a bad turn two nights ago; I brought her up with me as I like to do come evening to play some vidya as that was one of our favourite activities to do together, but I could tell she was in pain. She's been in a managed decline for some time. I admit, I was a little bit shocked when I got the phone call from my mother at the vet this morning that Bean had to go, but I also know it was the best thing for her. She lived a well-loved fifteen years. When I came to visit her for the final time, she smiled and meeped at only me. I raised her from kittenhood as a child myself, and now I am an adult in my twenties. She was also the last of my childhood cats to pass on. For the first time in my entire life, I am catless.

Admittedly, I have some residual anger towards my family. My mother wanted her cremated, but I put my foot down. This isn't a judgment on any other kiwis who go down that path as I understand everyone's values are different, but I couldn't bear the thought of her precious body being burnt up like that. I couldn't make her well, but I'm glad I could do this one thing for her. I'm also mad that my uncle made me and my family look after his demented feral in Bean's final weeks, as Bean couldn't access her favourite parts of the house as he was segregated from her in there. Swanning around Asia was more important than my cat's comfort apparently. I'm continued to be blown away at how disgustingly selfish everyone in my family is.

Anyways, I don't want this post to be spent bitching about them. In April I had what I perceived as a setback in that I had to go back home, when for years all I wanted to do was escape home. In hindsight, I truly thank God for that happening; I got to spend Bean's final weeks with her. Even my mother, who used my affection for Bean against me at times, admitted that Bean loved me the most out of everyone in the end. I've loved every cat that's come into my life, but Bean is particularly special. I'm burying her in her favourite spot in the garden. I know she'll enjoy being with her brother and friends up there in the Great Beyond, and I know she'll be waiting for me when my own time comes 🤍
 
Getting royally assfucked by my electricity provider. 500€ bill out of nowhere, plus my monthly payments rising from 50€ to almost 100€. This without me having changed anything regarding electricity consumption and me getting back 250€ from them in 2025 and 600€ in 2024. Pure madness.
 
I haven't been doing good.

I feel bad saying it because I know I'm not the victim here, far from it, but all the horrible stuff going on in the UK has grabbed hold of my heart and mind and refuses to let go. I can't stop thinking about it. Literally everything brings my mind back to it. To make matters worse, England is the site of a personal interest of mine which normally occupies a lot of my thoughts and inspires my writing and drawing, so it's invaded my hobbies and made it hard to enjoy them.

I've been making a concentrated effort to be overtly pro America to piss off the people who tell me I shouldn't be (and because I appreciate more and more each day how brave the Founding Fathers were) so I was very enthusiastic about 4th of July coming up and have big plans for it but it's so invasive in my head that all the country centric holiday stuff makes me think of the UK and how it's struggling. Especially all the overt patriotism, it makes me feel bad knowing how their national pride is being surpressed. I really don't want the usual jokes about leaving England right now, I don't need more reminders.

I feel better removing myself from everything, I don't check a&n or the happenings threads anymore, and that's really helped. For a couple of days after the inquiry got released I scrolled X for the first time and that was a terrible idea that made me feel even worse. No more of that. I don't even check what Lowe is saying anymore. But when I start to think hey I'm feeling a lot better I remember that that means jack shit, all the awful stuff is still going on and then I feel sick. I keep going around in circles in my head, trying to convince myself everything will work out and arguing against why bigger stuff hasn't happened yet. I have the same arguments with myself over and over.

I'm just hoping letting it out might help me feel better for the next few days so I'm venting in here for lack of options. It's hard to explain stuff like this to people in real life, I don't want to put all this terrible stuff in their heads.
 
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