Happy 2023 - Drunk Spergery

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  • 🇵🇦 Nuestro primer dominio localizado está en español en kiwifarms.pa. Our first localized domain is on Spanish on kiwifarms.pa.
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  • China will NOT invade Taiwan.
  • Food shortages.
  • Massive inflation.
  • Migrant crisis at US-Mexico border.
  • Kanye West will meet Lavrov in the Kremlin: he will be wearing a black baseball cap with a white Z on it and Lavrov will be wearing Kanye’s 3D printed boots.
  • Ukraine-Russia War : no major developments. Both sides claim victory.
  • CBDCs will not happen.
  • Oil prices will NOT skyrocket.
  • Trudeau will remain in power.
  • Housing prices will increase.
  • Protests and uprisings in Europe.
  • US energy grid attacks by copycats.
  • Russia launches massive ransomware attacks against the West.
  • Andrew Tate will be replaced by some other PUA, possibly someone closely related to Jordan Peterson.
  • At least 4 countries will adopt Bitcoin as official currency.
  • Singapore, Hong Kong, Switzerland want to dominate financial sector/banking and adopt Bitcoin friendly laws overnight.
  • Things get worse in the US and Kamala will replace Biden as predicted by Trudeau.
  • Putin will release a video where he is exercising and practising martial arts with Steven Seagal. He appears to be in good health. Seagal not so much.
 
Global politic stuff.

Continuation of Russia-Ukraine conflict with no side winning or losing (beside the dead slavs peasantry that was conscripted and first tier country people's tax being subverted to fund another never ending war).
I expect globo homo stuff to be a bit on the downlow as its not an election year in the US.
Another mass shooting, bombing or other horrible crimes that will be used to keep eroding people right's little by little.
China does another human right abuse and nobody bats an eyelid because all their money goes through china.
Some third tier world country has another president "democratically" elected.

Farm stuff
Another retard troon makes it their mission to take down the farm. Null has to patch up the site with even more duct tape and sell more coins.
Ethan Ralph disappear in Mexico, to reappear a few month later in a cartel execution video.
Byuus comes back from the dead. All the gay journo and other faggot shilling his death act surprised, ignore we were right and keeps blaming the farm for forcing some poor troon into hiding.
Chantal gets abused by her new third world country fiancee (or is it husband). Moar content for a whole year.
Some youtube cow dies or off themselves. The farm somehow blamed.
 
A new right-wing political party forms in the UK, but Sargon of Akkad promptly joins it and thereby single-handedly destroys it.

Patrick S. Tomlinson finally faces enforcement of the outstanding lolsuit judgment against him, and chimps out so hard that he gets charged with assault against a debt collection agent.
But then he pulls a DSP and beats the charges.

SecretGamerGrrl continues to impotently wail on his Tumblr blog all year about how he can't get his Twitter account back because that would involve pressing a button.

Pedos make an open effort to be recognized under the LGBT+ umbrella. Many of our lolcows join this campaign, but when it ultimately fails to get institutional support, they pretend that they never did.

Elon Musk takes his shitposting too far, and his investors / business partners turn on him, forcing him out of his own businesses.
 
Someone will create an AI Porn site using standard diffusion.
Check the checkboxes next to your fetishes and get whatever you want.
I'm sure eventually future lolcow accounts will get leaked containing detailed and specific descriptions of their depravity.
 
World stuff:
Interest rates will keep going up

At least 1 in 3 countries will enter into recessions.

Food shortages will start, mostly in poor nations.

Several nations will join Sri Lanka in economically imploding, Pakistan possibly being the first.

Haiti will totally fall apart prompting a UN intervention, lots of Haitians will flee to the US.

Collapse of ESG funds


Farms:

Jazz will end up on my 600lb life and get booted from Harvard. Sander will continue to be a totally 100% hetrosexual man.

A number of cows will end up homeless.

Ralph will go 3 for 3 in Portugal and end up in a coma.

Nick Fuentes will get caught sucking dick with

Im predicting to 2023 to be a big year.
 
Sanctioncels will sneede at BRICS avoiding sanctions.

China will not invade Taiwan. Taiwan will eventually be assimilated via diplomacy in the next ten years with the help of their own political class, protests will happen and go nowhere after two weeks.

Musk leaves Twitter and leaves some rando as CEO after he gets bored, all he wanted was their data for neuralink. User DATA is what techfags most value now, not money.

The alt-alt-right spinoff becomes a thing, USA right wingers splinter even more into dumb takes and pearl clutching between each other before the elections .

The tech bubble keeps bursting while every clickbait site downplays it and pretends nothing of the sort is happening. Lots of startups die, lots of people get sued for crypto scams and defrauding investors while others simply loose their jobs. Lots of "tech nomads" will be fired or dragged back to an office kicking and screaming, the seethe will be unreal.

Disney, Microsoft and Tesla stock goes down. Lots of their operations get killed off or re-structured. Pixar Movies, Netflix originals, marvel capeshit and AAA videogames releases start failing spectacularly. The cal-arts kids at Disney gets their heads chopped off and replaced with asians after several bombs in a row, several shows and vidya in production get cancelled before release.

The sjw stuff is going to be replaced by undilluted meanness, is not gonna be ", you did a sexism you fascist!" the internet is going to be more " your mother died and you have cancer, eat shit loser lololol XD, dabs*" . People are more evil and subhuman than ever regardless of faction and every new cohort of teens online is showing less humanity and empathy.

You might notice a lot of personalities you follow simply leaving social media, they won't make a deal out of it, you simply will see them posting less and less until they don't engage with their fans or communities at all anymore. Lots of projects will work in silent and stop updating or engaging the press until they are finished, lots of content creators will paywall all their updates and stop posting publicly. Only lolcows who feed on drama will remain active on social media and lots and lots of people will fire their community managers, even among normies there will be a growing sentiment to stop posting and a growing resentment towards viral marketing campaigns
 
Ostatnio edytowane:
Someone will finally buy a Patrick Tomlinson novel, with real money in a real store, thereby releasing him from the Curse of the Fat Child.

DARE will not have sex at all, least of all with his Shriners blood bride or whatever it was he was on about.

AI will continue to look/act/seem very gay. The art will get worse; the chat bots will get better.

TikTok will be banned in the States to some degree. It will be largely ineffective.

CWC will be release from his prison Hell and reunite with his toys.

EDP and that teen-girl-burrito-buying guy Death Watch. Same with Merkotor or whatever his name is (RIP).

The radfem menace will stay contained in Stinkditch or other sites, inshallah.

Video games will continue being bad. I will continue posting wonderfully about some of them.

Logan Paul FTC troubles arc. H3H3 hard decline. A lot of really shitty shows are still on the docket, meaning there will be plenty of youtube whining about them.

I do think shows will start getting better after this year though. Austerity is the enemy of Diversity; the era of She-Hulk is coming to an end.

I will continue loving you all dearly :)
 
I think my post was eaten so...:
  1. Kanye's career will die thanks to Nick Puentes' faggotry
  2. Trump won't get a reelection
  3. More covid/Omnicron variants
  4. More lolcows to document.
  5. Keffals will eventually join the 41% (in minecraft) as soon as they find out that Null has amassed a harem of Ukranian/Russian/Thicc/Obese waifus to worship him; the Farms sends Null well wishes/gifts/tributes
  6. I'll be happy since I'll be out of the US (after all, I did state that Kiwi Farms is a beneficial fungus in the interwebz)
  7. Queen Lich Barb will die senile, alone without her hoard lol
    1. There will still be Youtubers documenting Chris-Chan, including @GiBi, The guy that was forced to DFE due to some crazy chick being kicked out of his Discord Server, Smokey McCC, etc.
 
I predict that this year Youtuber ScottFalco troons out. He recently became a vtuber and posted a really AGP short yesterday.
 
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