#freeross wants to start a Kiwi Farms Girlfriend Thread

[#FreeRoss]

Hello, Kiwifarms. As many of you may know, I am a single virgin with rage. I am in search of a girlfriend, but I have sadly had no luck. So I made this thread to find a girlfriend. Here are some of the things I am looking for in a girlfriend. If you meet any of this list of demands, feel free to DM me so we can start dating each other.

1. has BPD or some form of mental issues
2. has low self-esteem and other forms of low self-worth
3. is desperate for a man and would do anything to keep them from leaving
4. Preferred but not necessary: comes from an abusive household.
5. has colored hair and glasses. I like the stereotypical femcel look.
6. easily adapts to my interests, such as music, politics, and sports.
7. is fine with my occasional abusive tendencies, such as screaming and insults
8. is extremely loyal to me and fine with cutting off male friends and family members that threaten my power.

This is what I want in a girlfriend: Everyone is welcome to apply to be my girlfriend. I will, in return for you meeting my demands, give you love and affection and treat you like the queen of my universe.

 

[Hellwalker]

I thought you already did this? Have you used the sign I suggested?

https://kiwifarms.pl/threads/dating-thread.212083/

 

[GotFriedBy]

Good list

 

[Axiom.]

I'm everything you need and want, bb.

 

[Smokeski]

i gotchu fam

https://kiwifarms.pl/threads/samant...yinggravityagain-emily-nicole-cassidy.141558/

when she comes back hop in her dms

 

[#FreeRoss]

I thought you already did this? Have you used the sign I suggested?

https://kiwifarms.pl/threads/dating-thread.212083/

I forgot I made that thread. Second time's the charm, I guess.

I'm everything you need and want, bb.

hmu bby

Good list

so true

i gotchu fam

https://kiwifarms.pl/threads/samant...yinggravityagain-emily-nicole-cassidy.141558/

when she comes back hop in her dms

aight bet

 

[TenMilesWide]

I am a single virgin with rage. I am in search of a girlfriend,

see there's the problem, you shouldn't be looking for a girlfriend but instead a boyfriend-free girl. there is a distinction.

 

[Brett DeLawyer]

Have you tried mentioning how much you hate your mother? Women definitely love that.

 

[Toji Suzuhara]

I think that you should start gymmaxxing, ross. Honestly you just start doing daily walks around your block and you'll get fit pretty fast

 

[Miriam Margoyles]

 

[Whatevermancer]

I read the title as "Kiwi Farms Garfield Thread".

 

[#FreeRoss]

I think that you should start gymmaxxing, ross. Honestly you just start doing daily walks around your block and you'll get fit pretty fast

This is unironically good advice. I think I'm going to start anorexia maxing as well to attract my ideal mate.

 

[Frederica Bernkastel]

1. has BPD or some form of mental issues
2. has low self-esteem and other forms of low self-worth
3. is desperate for a man and would do anything to keep them from leaving
4. Preferred but not necessary: comes from an abusive household.
5. has colored hair and glasses. I like the stereotypical femcel look.
6. easily adapts to my interests, such as music, politics, and sports.
7. is fine with my occasional abusive tendencies, such as screaming and insults
8. is extremely loyal to me and fine with cutting off male friends and family members that threaten my power.

It sounds like you want a tranny because it would fit most of these, and you did not specify rejecting them either

 

[TenMilesWide]

This is unironically good advice. I think I'm going to start anorexia maxing as well to attract my ideal mate.

don't gymmaxx and anorexiamode at the same time, you gotta eat big to make big gains. cut after.

 

[bingin]

It sounds like you want a tranny because it would fit most of these, and you did not specify rejecting them either

i believe the girl in girlfriend rules that out

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Overall a bold approach, but it's clear innovation is the spice of life.

The only process improvement I'd recommend is to have it be 2 of 8 criteria. Otherwise you could find yourself in some troublesome situations. Also 25% is a lot more aesthetically pleasing than 12.5%, let's be honest.

 

[break these cuffs]

I forgot I made that thread. Second time's the charm, I guess.

Not with Zoey it isn't!

 

[We Are The Witches]

The 6, 7, and 8 are horrible points, everything else is fine; 5 is debatable.

You can't give love in an abusive relationship.

 

[CallmeCicada]

Not with Zoey it isn't!

 

[Black Man Underwear]

Send bobs, pls. Open cloth.