🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

[Sonic Hoo]

surrounded myself with a veritable garden of books

Why does it matter when you hardly read any of them?

 

[Hat]

Nothing, and that's a bad thing.

What do you plan to do to remedy this situation?

 

[BriarHeart]

I admit that it's hard for me to come up with truly original ideas because I've surrounded myself with a veritable garden of books and movies in the hopes that I can actually write a good story. To be honest, I had no fucking clue what I was doing with Redesigning Eva. My protagonist was a blank slate, I had no real plot to speak of, no sense of direction. Everything that could've went wrong went really fucking wrong.

So you failed at writing your first novel. And yet, look at that, you're still here! The world didn't end, and you're (relatively) fine. Remember this next time failure seems like this insurmountable, world-eating kaiju, y/y? You can fail and still end up okay. What matters is changing bad habits and doing quantifiable actions that further your goals.

 

[Connor Bible]

It's hard to motivate myself. I have this crippling fear of failure that's so pervasive that I stop and hesitate before I really do anything.

 

[Smutley]

@Connor, why did you get kicked off the stephenking.com forums the first time? Do you remember what it is you said that got you unpersoned?

 

[Connor Bible]

@Connor, why did you get kicked off the stephenking.com forums the first time? Do you remember what it is you said that got you unpersoned?

I don't remember. It was during high school.

 

[DN 420]

@Connor courage isn't lack of fear it's having fear and doing it anyways.

 

[Locksnap]

I don't remember. It was during high school.

You don't remember why you were banned from a forum? Is this a common occurrence for you?

 

[Connor Bible]

I can barely type a whole page in Microsoft Word in under five minutes, let alone write a coherent post. The fear is deep, people.

You don't remember why you were banned from a forum? Is this a common occurrence for you?

I think it involved writer's block. RE was in its early stages at the time.

 

[BriarHeart]

It's hard to motivate myself. I have this crippling fear of failure that's so pervasive that I stop and hesitate before I really do anything.

Next time you're afraid of doing something, recite the Litany Against Fear:

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past, I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone, there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.

And then do it anyway.

 

[Sonic Hoo]

@Connor Why do you hate KaijuX?

 

[Smutley]

I can barely type a whole page in Microsoft Word in under five minutes, let alone write a coherent post. The fear is deep, people

I've got to give you credit man, I read those movie reviews you did on Wrong Planet and they really weren't too bad. Instead of writing fiction, why don't you move in that kind of direction? There were a bunch of people here looking forward to your movie review thread that just kind of petered out.

 

[Golly]

It's hard to motivate myself. I have this crippling fear of failure that's so pervasive that I stop and hesitate before I really do anything.

Why not use your fear of failure to prepare yourself for the worst?

The way I see it, writing and the fine arts are probably the safest forms of creativity out there for those who are afraid of failure. You can hide everything away until you think it's ready. No one has to see the ugly work in progress if you don't want them to (but it's a good idea if you want worthwhile advice).

On top of that security you have, there are other ways to help keep your fear of failure at bay. You're much less likely to fail if you know your world, your characters and their motivations, and the plot. In an intimate and specific sense. Not a general sense.

I used to roleplay on forums (and still occasionally do tbh), and I always viewed it as acting with the written word. Acting requires a ton of specificity and familiarity with your character and how they behave in that given world. Writing fiction is basically the same.

Edit: Not that you ever acknowledge me or anything.

 

[The Knife]

Has anyone ever pointed out that you seem to have an extremely distorted concept of time passing? As in, you're barely twenty-one and yet somehow high school is too far back to remember? And you believe that three weeks is long enough for you to "get your act together" and come back new-baptized as if you were a completely different person?

 

[BriarHeart]

I can barely type a whole page in Microsoft Word in under five minutes, let alone write a coherent post. The fear is deep, people.

Have you talked about this fear with your counselor? Tried any anxiety/phobia management workbooks? You can get those at Barnes & Noble.

 

[Meowthkip]

I've since given up trying to write fanfiction in general. I feel more at home with original work. To write good fanfiction, you really have to honor the source material while still putting a fresh spin on it.

And you are unable to do this?

Hey, Connor, you wanna do some back and forth writing on a short story maybe? Kind of like a Round Robin, but just two people.

I could use the exercise.

 

[Connor Bible]

@Connor Why do you hate KaijuX?

I don't really hate him. I get frustrated with him when he's not looking, but feel terrible about it afterwards.

 

[BriarHeart]

And you are unable to do this?

Hey, Connor, you wanna do some back and forth writing on a short story maybe? Kind of like a Round Robin, but just two people.

I could use the exercise.

Word wars can be good practice, too. It's where two people free-write for a set amount of time, and when the time's up, the one with the most words "wins." My fiancee and I do it together when we get stuck, and no matter who wins, we both get the satisfaction of making progress.

[EDIT]

I don't really hate him. I get frustrated with him when he's not looking, but feel terrible about it afterwards.

Frustrated about what? Be specific, give examples.

 

[Locksnap]

Why isn't your therapist helping you with all your massive issues? Do you just not inform him of whats going on, or do you not implement his suggestions for change?

 

[Connor Bible]

Why isn't your therapist helping you with all your massive issues? Do you just not inform him of whats going on, or do you not implement his suggestions for change?

I've considered talking to my parents about getting a new therapist. I've been seeing him since 2009 and I've made very little progress.