Chris has been arrested

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You'd be surprised what female prisons are like and the type of women who end up there. Most of them are a significant threat to him more than he could ever imagine being to them. He will probably end up being raped by multiple women if he ends up in a female prison.

Which I guess is kind of heaven for a sex deprived autist like Chris...
Reminds me of a story I heard about some reality TV show where they had men and women on two separate islands in some kind of 'survival' situation.

The men had all made peace with each other and had built a fucking tiki bar.

The women were all at each other's throats and had skipped right to the end of Lord of the Flies in terms of being a hair's breadth from killing each other.
 
I love the "please I already called them, don't do it anymore" from people who are like the 50th to call already.

Hot tip: DON'T. CALL. ANYBODY.
 
What is his first prison tat going to be?
Ersatz Medallion, perhaps?

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