Something Awful and Friends - The roller-coaster train-wreck embarrassing downfall of a Web 1.0 giant and its tick offspring like from Cloverfield

[Articles and Nudes]

Forgetting the first rule of Butt Club...

 

[LOWERCASE LETTERS]

fuck goons

 

[Coolio55]

fuck goons
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Wheres the fucking dough? (Besides the fat heap behind the camera)

 

[AnOminous]

fuck goons
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That isn't fucking pizza, that's soup.

 

[Pissmaster]

fuck goons
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Goons in a nutshell are the kind of people who would spend hours ranting about how Epic Meal Time is awful because nothing they make looks appetizing nor do they respect the craft, and then they turn around and make this kind of puke

 

[BIG BILL HELL'S]

That isn't fucking pizza, that's soup.

There is no such thing as pizza, only greater and lesser forms of goulash.

 

[Big Fart Bart]

fuck goons
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Reminds me of when goons died trying to do that heartattack prone diet, lol. Constantly posting pictures of molten cheese in pure fat or what not to eachother.

 

[White Devil]

Reminds me of when goons died trying to do that heartattack prone diet, lol. Constantly posting pictures of molten cheese in pure fat or what not to eachother.

You mean posting photos of the goons natural state, cottage cheese in rendered fat.

 

[Long Tongue Silver]

Goons in a nutshell are the kind of people who would spend hours ranting about how Epic Meal Time is awful because nothing they make looks appetizing nor do they respect the craft, and then they turn around and make this kind of puke

Three words: Doobie's Dog House.

Never take any culinary suggestion from any goon seriously. Those fuckers would gladly eat a pie plate full of cheese whiz and call it a "pizza."

 

[Nigger Respecter]

Reminds me of when goons died trying to do that heartattack prone diet, lol. Constantly posting pictures of molten cheese in pure fat or what not to eachother.

It was the Low Carb thread and a poster who was like only 20 years old went to the doctor and his numbers were completely off the charts because he and every other idiot in that thread were just bragging about eating nothing but bacon and fried eggs all day, then one of the more "prominent" posters in the thread told the kid to ignore the doctor because doctors are all quacks. This resulted in the thread being shut down

 

[Trip Chesterton III]

Reminds me of when goons died trying to do that heartattack prone diet, lol. Constantly posting pictures of molten cheese in pure fat or what not to eachother.

 

[Shaka Brah]

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They probated the one person with good advice.

 

[trent]

Three words: Doobie's Dog House.

Never take any culinary suggestion from any goon seriously. Those fuckers would gladly eat a pie plate full of cheese whiz and call it a "pizza."

They always talked about the Costco pizza and hotdogs as if they were haute cuisine.

 

[Pissmaster]

They always talked about the Costco pizza and hotdogs as if they were haute cuisine.

And for anyone without a nearby Costco, their pizza is the kind where you can pick up a slice, and it just drips grease onto your plate.

It tastes fine as far as cheap pizza goes, but you seriously need about a good fifteen napkins or so just to blot it out.

 

[Coolio55]

It tastes fine as far as cheap pizza goes, but you seriously need about a good fifteen napkins or so just to blot it out.

Question: How many layers of parallax scrolling do you have in your C windows 2000 platformer game?

 

[Long Tongue Silver]

And for anyone without a nearby Costco, their pizza is the kind where you can pick up a slice, and it just drips grease onto your plate.

It tastes fine as far as cheap pizza goes, but you seriously need about a good fifteen napkins or so just to blot it out.

You're better off sticking with the hot dogs. Not bad for $1.50, drink included.

 

[Silas]

I just wait until I bring my groceries home and cook something there

 

[Ghostse]

Costco hotdog + drink is $1.50 and when people aren't losing their fuckin minds about the black coof, you can get freshly chopped onions on it.
Costco pizza is $10. The pizza is perfectly average New York styled (but with a little thicker crust than a NY style). It is frozen and topped with a good layer of mozzarella, and run through the conveyor pizza oven so all the melted cheese oil stays in place. The pepperoni they use is pretty salty.
Depending on where you live, its about what you'd expect for $10 pizza. If you are West Coast, it is significantly better than what you'd expect for $10. If you are East coast, except for NY, its pretty good for a $10 pizza. If you are in the midwest or NY, you're probably eating it and thinking about what you could have gotten at your local joint for an extra $5.
Its also pretty huge. Its party pizza.

The hot dog is a hot dog. They did not stick them up someone's ass immediately before serving, nor did they boil them in rancid urine, so it is as good as a normal beef hotdog is, not better no worse. The main point is it is $1.50 for that an a drink.

If you're hungry and hitting costco anyway, the hotdog is a decent lunch option. If you are picking up snacks for a party you can also order a couple of pizzas and have them ready to grab when you hit the checkout. If you are going out of your way for this shit, there is something wrong with you.

Anyway, that is a lot of autstic words about Costco Food to convey just precisely how middle-of-the-road it is.
Goons jizz themselves over it because sure its a $10 huge pizza, and while you could spend another $10-15 and get a better pizza, but that is $10-15 that isn't going to Lowtax Jeffery's patreon, some E-thot's only fans, hormones, or their dick inversion fund.
Same for the hotdog. They only have so much sad brains money, so while there are better lunch options available, all of them cost more than $1.50

And for anyone without a nearby Costco, their pizza is the kind where you can pick up a slice, and it just drips grease onto your plate.

It tastes fine as far as cheap pizza goes, but you seriously need about a good fifteen napkins or so just to blot it out.

what a fucking pussy.

 

[Emperor Julian]

Jesus I can almost hear the fat guy breathing.

 

[Pissmaster]

what a fucking pussy.

FAT

you are FAT