🦊 Furry Louis "Lou" Gagliardi / Ash Franzetti / Alex 'Ace' Maddox / Tegan Ainsley / Taryn Amita / Diana / gothickitteh / ashkat724 / Lynn Brooks / @acekatt - #T R A M S _ C R O W _ F U N D *buys 12 iPads* "Anyone got $600 they can spare?" *spits on cancer patient*

[REGENDarySumanai]

That is a sad story, sure enough. It's a shame no one in his family managed to scrape up enough money to replace those pain meds during this period of at least two months.

On an unrelated note, Lou bought himself some Hot Wheels cars for his 37th birthday.

Arrested development at its best.

 

[dunbrine47]

At 37 Lou:
- Doesn't have a job
- Doesn't have his own house
- Is still a virgin
- E-begs, relies on strangers to give him money
- No finical management skills

Lou is a contender for most pathetic cow on the site.

Once the Lolcow of the Year awards opens polls, I'm sure Lou can sweep a few categories.

 

[Norman B. Normal]

Well, this was a goddamned bust. I spent all day waiting for a chimpout that never came. That's more pathetic than anything Lou did today. Well, fine. Happy goddamn birthday, Lou. You got me. This counts as your present.

 

[Loona]

Mark my words: these three games will get forgotten and his Switch profile will only say "Played for a little while".

archive

old FAT man yells at cloud

archive

You haven't written anything in like a month, Lou. Are you even a writer if you hardly write?
Ironic, because you grifted for that all-in-one desktop PC because you needed something to write on. You probably forgot that happened.

archive

Don't do that, Lou. It's rude and you're too FAT already.

archive

 

[A single cheeto]

Mark my words: these three games will get forgotten and his Switch profile will only say "Played for a little while".
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archive

old FAT man yells at cloud
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archive

You haven't written anything in like a month, Lou. Are you even a writer if you hardly write?
Ironic, because you grifted for that all-in-one desktop PC because you needed something to write on. You probably forgot that happened.
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archive

Don't do that, Lou. It's rude and you're too FAT already.
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archive

Ori will most certainly be forgotten, because that game requires you to actually try. He'll die once, throw a fit, and never play it again.

 

[Trigger Me Timbers]

He's really turning up the "I GOT WANTS BECAUSE IT WAS OK AND FUCK YOU" in his recent twitter rant.

Wyświetl załącznik 1667079

Link / https://archive.vn/AhVy0

Bwhaahahha, I bought hotwheels FOR MYSELF HAAHAHAHAHAH what a fat faggot. Dude your almost 40. What did you buy for your nephew if not hot wheels? A $3 beach ball? The box the hotwheels came in?

and yes the dude sounds like he has a stick of butter in his throat.

I

 

[Turael]

My money is on him using the "I HAD A HORRIBLE LONELY BIRTHDAY GIB MONEY PLZ" schtick and using any inconvenience and loss he can exaggerate or outright make up and lie about to try and see if he can use that guilt to wring more blood from that stone.

Well what do you know, psychology works.

 

[unidentified code]

 

[Lurk]

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Lol still using his birthday as an excuse even though its over.

 

[drain]

This tweet wouldn't be out of place in a 15 year old twitter account. In a 20-something year old's account, it would be kinda weird. Now, a 37 year old tweeting this is just plain pathetic.

 

[Iron Hamster]

What's more pathetic is it didn't even happen. It's for pitybux.

 

[BoobWhiskers]

This tweet wouldn't be out of place in a 15 year old twitter account. In a 20-something year old's account, it would be kinda weird. Now, a 37 year old tweeting this is just plain pathetic.

What's more pathetic is it didn't even happen. It's for pitybux.

Was gonna say, what on earth would they even be waking No-Life Lou up for?

 

[JoyQ]

Was gonna say, what on earth would they even be waking No-Life Lou up for?

wonder if they took him out bowling for his birthday

 

[Smother Me Father]

Have to admit I feel let down by his actual birthday. I was expecting a full blown melt down about how shit his life is, how the world is against him, and how his parents were LITERALLY attacking him for being trans. Lou letting everyone down is par for the course though.

 

[flight of ideas]

For Lou's special day I'd honestly love to see your analysis/roast here.

yesterday i was busy celebrating the birth and many lifetime accomplishments of dame angela lansbury.

however! today i bring you a true&honest, highly scientific astrological breakdown of our lou’s character based a reported birthdate of october 16, 1983 at 1:02am EST.

Spoiler

before reading, accept the following a priori:

1. astrology is a fun parlor game
2. traits attributed to one sign/alignment or another operate on a spectrum (lol) of positive to negative manifestations in a person’s character. as is exceedingly well-documented here, Our Lou tends toward the abysmal, and that’s what i’ve emphasized.

SUN IN LIBRA | prone to loneliness and the negative effects of isolation (self-inflicted or not); wants to be popular and friends with everyone but rarely gets past surface-level interactions; prefers the finer (read: more expensive) things in life but is rarely satisfied with their acquisition; extremely indecisive when faced with a choice of any size, mostly due to thinking about it way too much; struggles with making one-on-one interactions meaningful and thereby building deeper relationships over time


MOON IN AQUARIUS | obsessively devoted to personal freedom (think Cartman of Southpark “I do what I want!” not Mel Gibson of Braveheart, here); stubbornly resistant to social norms; prefers the exclusive company of those with similar ideals and opinions; great believer in using “intellect” and “logic” to win arguments rather than emotion*; very low tolerance for emotionality in others

*sidebar i think the potential positive qualities of this particular trait got overshadowed by his shit upbringing (overindulgence vs. neglect in a constant tug-of-war will do that to a lad) but here we are, aren’t we



RISING/ASCENDANT IN LEO** | the lion of the zodiac, the furry joke writes itself; striking personal appearance (say what you like, Our Lou doesn’t blend into a crowd), often with good hair (if he washed it! chrissake!); demands to be the center of attention all the time; attracted to others with wealth, integrity, and/or social power; idealistic but extremely stubborn; eager for power but resistant to responsibility; acquires new possessions whenever possible for the sake of having them and showing them off


**if you don’t know: your ascendant sign is the face you present to the world. it is calculated based on birth time and changes frequently throughout the day.

there’s more if you’re still interested

Spoiler

MERCURY IN LIBRA | mercury is the planet of communication, named for the roman messenger god with a winged hat and sandals. in lou’s case, mercury being in libra illustrates how inconsistent he is in holding an opinion or position on any issue, from what kind of big-titty kitty to be this week to whether Joe Biden is or is not red MAGA. it’s also why, when confronted by a bigger personality, Lou backs off, DFEs, cries in a corner, etc. Libra at its best can tolerate conflict and resolve it amicably; at its least adaptive, it practices total avoidance.



VENUS IN VIRGO | venus is the planet of relationships. in virgo, venus can manifest as a person hypercritical of self and others; who demands perfection in all things; who endlessly searches for the perfect thing at the expense of something (or in Lou’s case, a massive portfolio of somethings, apparently) that were good enough; taken too far, this combination of idealism and perfectionism leads right down the gilded path to outright intolerance - so much for social justice



JUPITER IN SAGITTARIUS | jupiter is the planet of a lot of shit, but let’s keep it simple and say it’s relevant to intellect, morals, growth, and personal experience. the positive qualities of jupiter in sagittarius are an expansive, tolerant worldview brought on by genuine curiosity about others. ya boy here has jumped the shark into dogmatic insistence that his view is the correct one. Lou’s jupiter in sagittarius is consistent with his relatively broad base of general knowledge (for a lolcow anyway), as well as his snobbishness about it. in addition, he has a defined moral and ethical system (as applies to other people at least) and is very preachy about it.



SATURN IN SCORPIO | saturn is the planet of fear and insecurity. Lou here is afraid of his own big feelings, which frankly comes as no surprise to me. unfortunately for him, it appears from all evidence that he was never given any kind of help as a child to learn to self-regulate, either, so he’s a bit stuck in that regard. that repressed or misdirected emotion can lead to negative compulsive behaviors, like, i don’t know, buying vidya just to distract from intrusive thoughts? eating mcdonalds for a hit of the chemicals they use to flavor the fries? that formula was designed in a lab in new jersey, Lou.



URANUS, NEPTUNE, PLUTO | these planets move so slowly, bless their hearts, that their positions change in astrological terms only once every few years or once in a micro-generation. as i’m sure everyone has already taken up a side in the generation wars, and because i’m getting bored, i’ll skip these.



NORTH NODE IN GEMINI | the north node in a person’s chart represents an area for growth. in Lou’s case, it indicates that many of his “relationships” are shallow and short-lived (scare quotes because while he is capable of doing so until Amputation Saga 2021, homie doesn’t leave the house except to buy lettuce, tomatoes, and matchbox cars). what would probably help this libra-aquarius-leo sonofabitch is, gasp, working to deepen the connections he does have, online or otherwise.

one has learned not to hope for these things, however. one merely indulges an autistic interest in astrology and one’s favorite bovine, and day-drinks to a tolerable future for us all.

e: typo

 

[drain]

I think he is quiet like this because he is concocting his next big grift. He knows everyone and their mom already know about his schemes and that nobody will give shit to him for this birthday, so he's just lying low, waiting for the dust to settle so he can put his new grifting plan into action.

Louis is the kind of person who won't miss an opportunity to make himself a victim, even if this means he has to wait a little for it. Also that friend from ''michigian'' is as real as Louis' good health and job.

 

[Iron Hamster]

Wyświetl załącznik 1668288
wonder if they took him out bowling for his birthday

Kinda hard when none of them can leave the house because they are immunocompromised, his brother's father needs his drugs so bad he should be in the hospital, and his mother is dead.

yesterday i was busy celebrating the birth and many lifetime accomplishments of dame angela lansbury.

however! today i bring you a true&honest, highly scientific astrological breakdown of our lou’s character based a reported birthdate of october 16, 1983 at 1:02am EST.

Spoiler

before reading, accept the following a priori:

1. astrology is a fun parlor game
2. traits attributed to one sign/alignment or another operate on a spectrum (lol) of positive to negative manifestations in a person’s character. as is exceedingly well-documented here, Our Lou tends toward the abysmal, and that’s what i’ve emphasized.

SUN IN LIBRA | prone to loneliness and the negative effects of isolation (self-inflicted or not); wants to be popular and friends with everyone but rarely gets past surface-level interactions; prefers the finer (read: more expensive) things in life but is rarely satisfied with their acquisition; extremely indecisive when faced with a choice of any size, mostly due to thinking about it way too much; struggles with making one-on-one interactions meaningful and thereby building deeper relationships over time


MOON IN AQUARIUS | obsessively devoted to personal freedom (think Cartman of Southpark “I do what I want!” not Mel Gibson of Braveheart, here); stubbornly resistant to social norms; prefers the exclusive company of those with similar ideals and opinions; great believer in using “intellect” and “logic” to win arguments rather than emotion*; very low tolerance for emotionality in others

*sidebar i think the potential positive qualities of this particular trait got overshadowed by his shit upbringing (overindulgence vs. neglect in a constant tug-of-war will do that to a lad) but here we are, aren’t we



RISING/ASCENDANT IN LEO** | the lion of the zodiac, the furry joke writes itself; striking personal appearance (say what you like, Our Lou doesn’t blend into a crowd), often with good hair (if he washed it! chrissake!); demands to be the center of attention all the time; attracted to others with wealth, integrity, and/or social power; idealistic but extremely stubborn; eager for power but resistant to responsibility; acquires new possessions whenever possible for the sake of having them and showing them off


**if you don’t know: your ascendant sign is the face you present to the world. it is calculated based on birth time and changes frequently throughout the day.

there’s more if you’re still interested

Spoiler

MERCURY IN LIBRA | mercury is the planet of communication, named for the roman messenger god with a winged hat and sandals. in lou’s case, mercury being in libra illustrates how inconsistent he is in holding an opinion or position on any issue, from what kind of big-titty kitty to be this week to whether Joe Biden is or is not red MAGA. it’s also why, when confronted by a bigger personality, Lou backs off, DFEs, cries in a corner, etc. Libra at its best can tolerate conflict and resolve it amicably; at its least adaptive, it practices total avoidance.



VENUS IN VIRGO | venus is the planet of relationships. in virgo, venus can manifest as a person hypercritical of self and others; who demands perfection in all things; who endlessly searches for the perfect thing at the expense of something (or in Lou’s case, a massive portfolio of somethings, apparently) that were good enough; taken too far, this combination of idealism and perfectionism leads right down the gilded path to outright intolerance - so much for social justice



JUPITER IN SAGITTARIUS | jupiter is the planet of a lot of shit, but let’s keep it simple and say it’s relevant to intellect, morals, growth, and personal experience. the positive qualities of jupiter in sagittarius are an expansive, tolerant worldview brought on by genuine curiosity about others. ya boy here has jumped the shark into dogmatic insistence that his view is the correct one. Lou’s jupiter in sagittarius is consistent with his relatively broad base of general knowledge (for a lolcow anyway), as well as his snobbishness about it. in addition, he has a defined moral and ethical system (as applies to other people at least) and is very preachy about it.



SATURN IN SCORPIO | saturn is the planet of fear and insecurity. Lou here is afraid of his own big feelings, which frankly comes as no surprise to me. unfortunately for him, it appears from all evidence that he was never given any kind of help as a child to learn to self-regulate, either, so he’s a bit stuck in that regard. that repressed or misdirected emotion can lead to negative compulsive behaviors, like, i don’t know, buying vidya just to distract from intrusive thoughts? eating mcdonalds for a hit of the chemicals they use to flavor the fries? that formula was designed in a lab in new jersey, Lou.



URANUS, NEPTUNE, PLUTO | these planets move so slowly, bless their hearts, that their positions change in astrological terms only once every few years or once in a micro-generation. as i’m sure everyone has already taken up a side in the generation wars, and because i’m getting bored, i’ll skip these.



NORTH NODE IN GEMINI | the north node in a person’s chart represents an area for growth. in Lou’s case, it indicates that many of his “relationships” are shallow and short-lived (scare quotes because while he is capable of doing so until Amputation Saga 2021, homie doesn’t leave the house except to buy lettuce, tomatoes, and matchbox cars). what would probably help this libra-aquarius-leo sonofabitch is, gasp, working to deepen the connections he does have, online or otherwise.

one has learned not to hope for these things, however. one merely indulges an autistic interest in astrology and one’s favorite bovine, and day-drinks to a tolerable future for us all.

e: typo

And people poo-poo astrology.

 

[Sintharia]

yesterday i was busy celebrating the birth and many lifetime accomplishments of dame angela lansbury.

however! today i bring you a true&honest, highly scientific astrological breakdown of our lou’s character based a reported birthdate of october 16, 1983 at 1:02am EST.

Spoiler

before reading, accept the following a priori:

1. astrology is a fun parlor game
2. traits attributed to one sign/alignment or another operate on a spectrum (lol) of positive to negative manifestations in a person’s character. as is exceedingly well-documented here, Our Lou tends toward the abysmal, and that’s what i’ve emphasized.

SUN IN LIBRA | prone to loneliness and the negative effects of isolation (self-inflicted or not); wants to be popular and friends with everyone but rarely gets past surface-level interactions; prefers the finer (read: more expensive) things in life but is rarely satisfied with their acquisition; extremely indecisive when faced with a choice of any size, mostly due to thinking about it way too much; struggles with making one-on-one interactions meaningful and thereby building deeper relationships over time


MOON IN AQUARIUS | obsessively devoted to personal freedom (think Cartman of Southpark “I do what I want!” not Mel Gibson of Braveheart, here); stubbornly resistant to social norms; prefers the exclusive company of those with similar ideals and opinions; great believer in using “intellect” and “logic” to win arguments rather than emotion*; very low tolerance for emotionality in others

*sidebar i think the potential positive qualities of this particular trait got overshadowed by his shit upbringing (overindulgence vs. neglect in a constant tug-of-war will do that to a lad) but here we are, aren’t we



RISING/ASCENDANT IN LEO** | the lion of the zodiac, the furry joke writes itself; striking personal appearance (say what you like, Our Lou doesn’t blend into a crowd), often with good hair (if he washed it! chrissake!); demands to be the center of attention all the time; attracted to others with wealth, integrity, and/or social power; idealistic but extremely stubborn; eager for power but resistant to responsibility; acquires new possessions whenever possible for the sake of having them and showing them off


**if you don’t know: your ascendant sign is the face you present to the world. it is calculated based on birth time and changes frequently throughout the day.

there’s more if you’re still interested

Spoiler

MERCURY IN LIBRA | mercury is the planet of communication, named for the roman messenger god with a winged hat and sandals. in lou’s case, mercury being in libra illustrates how inconsistent he is in holding an opinion or position on any issue, from what kind of big-titty kitty to be this week to whether Joe Biden is or is not red MAGA. it’s also why, when confronted by a bigger personality, Lou backs off, DFEs, cries in a corner, etc. Libra at its best can tolerate conflict and resolve it amicably; at its least adaptive, it practices total avoidance.



VENUS IN VIRGO | venus is the planet of relationships. in virgo, venus can manifest as a person hypercritical of self and others; who demands perfection in all things; who endlessly searches for the perfect thing at the expense of something (or in Lou’s case, a massive portfolio of somethings, apparently) that were good enough; taken too far, this combination of idealism and perfectionism leads right down the gilded path to outright intolerance - so much for social justice



JUPITER IN SAGITTARIUS | jupiter is the planet of a lot of shit, but let’s keep it simple and say it’s relevant to intellect, morals, growth, and personal experience. the positive qualities of jupiter in sagittarius are an expansive, tolerant worldview brought on by genuine curiosity about others. ya boy here has jumped the shark into dogmatic insistence that his view is the correct one. Lou’s jupiter in sagittarius is consistent with his relatively broad base of general knowledge (for a lolcow anyway), as well as his snobbishness about it. in addition, he has a defined moral and ethical system (as applies to other people at least) and is very preachy about it.



SATURN IN SCORPIO | saturn is the planet of fear and insecurity. Lou here is afraid of his own big feelings, which frankly comes as no surprise to me. unfortunately for him, it appears from all evidence that he was never given any kind of help as a child to learn to self-regulate, either, so he’s a bit stuck in that regard. that repressed or misdirected emotion can lead to negative compulsive behaviors, like, i don’t know, buying vidya just to distract from intrusive thoughts? eating mcdonalds for a hit of the chemicals they use to flavor the fries? that formula was designed in a lab in new jersey, Lou.



URANUS, NEPTUNE, PLUTO | these planets move so slowly, bless their hearts, that their positions change in astrological terms only once every few years or once in a micro-generation. as i’m sure everyone has already taken up a side in the generation wars, and because i’m getting bored, i’ll skip these.



NORTH NODE IN GEMINI | the north node in a person’s chart represents an area for growth. in Lou’s case, it indicates that many of his “relationships” are shallow and short-lived (scare quotes because while he is capable of doing so until Amputation Saga 2021, homie doesn’t leave the house except to buy lettuce, tomatoes, and matchbox cars). what would probably help this libra-aquarius-leo sonofabitch is, gasp, working to deepen the connections he does have, online or otherwise.

one has learned not to hope for these things, however. one merely indulges an autistic interest in astrology and one’s favorite bovine, and day-drinks to a tolerable future for us all.

e: typo

This was very informative. Astrology is weird because it’s so blanket statement that you can throw a rock and hit something that matches. But these aspects that you pulled out reflect well with the observed behavior of Lou.

It’s a shame that he has no actual desire to improve himself. It’s never too late, if you’re willing to put in the work, and honestly, even taking a look at something as sketchy as a star chart can be a kick in the pants for some people.

 

[ExsanguinateHorizon]

Stole a scene from Brother Bear. Can you recognize some users?
*Added a few more

Spoiler: L to R

Chicken Picnic, Turael, _01, Wooden Spoon, Lou's Biggest Fan, Second Missing Primarch Space Egyptian, Boob Whiskers, PunPun
Leonard Helplessness, General Disarray, The Dude

 

[Lurk]

He hasn't sold the Xbox yet

https://archive.is/xa9Bq

Stole a scene from Brother Bear. Can you recognize some users?

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This is brilliant! I spot Lou's Biggest Fan, Wooden Spoon and Boob Whiskers, I think