"I'm an expert in natural healing, and one of the best independent researchers in the world, because I'm a composer, a and a vocalist, a creative person, and a multi instrumentalist WHO ALSO STUDIES ASTROPHYSICS. .."
Peep that modesty. A high school graduate who couldn't hold a minimum wage job until her mid-50s is the world's foremost expert in curing Corona-chan, everyone!
Edit: after continuing her litany of, er, "talents", Marissa wrapped up with "AND my cousin Seward won a million dollar prize in medical research , he's a professor at Harvard University - and he might die. He might die!" Implying that only she can save him, IF he starts answering her phone calls and listening to her wackadoo advice. Because a tenured Harvard professor of medicine is clearly less capable than a mentally ill woman at understanding and treating viruses.
She then goes on to describe a gas station employee she knows, "who is a preacher from Africa", who she says has been dry fasting for four days. Marissa says that the dry fasting African preacher-slash-gas station employee has a much better chance of surviving than Cousin Seward does.
Corona-chan
