DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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Salubrious powiedział(a):
I know DSP will never do it on his own because "he's so busy", but can one of DSP's paypigs that stalks this board PLEASE create DSP an OBS layout. Something that looks like this (please forgive me, I did this in paint in 2 minutes).

Then he can stop fucking around with his webcam placement.

Wyświetl załącznik 820878
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DSP also said that he will never "shrink down" the game because that will ruin the quality of the feed and upload, according to him during the same stream where he ran into this issue of webcam placement.

Its amazing what you can do in 2 minutes in paint to plot out what he can do in OBS to make something clean and neat. He won't have to reposition his webcam at the start of every new game to make sure he isn't covering up HP bars or mini maps or any other pertinent information. But Phi's too busy to take 2 minutes to make something simple. He's too busy to even make separate scenes in OBS for each of the games he's streaming. And too busy to do this during the prestream or before he even starts the prestream, because he has to do this while he's "clocked in."
 
Comma powiedział(a):
Not directly related to DSP (for the time being...), but interesting nevertheless: Amazon is slowly but surely uncovering their strategy on the direction Twitch as a platform is supposed to be going (according to Amazon).

Twitch Blog | This Prime Day, Twitch Sells Out

This year, our favorite made-up holiday, Amazon Prime Day, takes place July 15 & 16. To celebrate, Twitch is hosting our very own live shopping show on /twitchpresents that promises to be unlik...
blog.twitch.tv blog.twitch.tv

Wyświetl załącznik 821803Wyświetl załącznik 821804




In short: they're going full homeshopping mode, presented by Twitch's biggest shills. Well, at least for one day, but it sure looks like writing on the wall to me. Btw, I'd call it "Twitch's Big Paid Shill-a-ton", but hey, I'm not smart enough to work at Amazon.

Anyway, to still somewhat tie this into the DSPhere: the whole internet knows he has been basically sucking Twitch/Amazon's dick since he returned to the platform - as he tends to do with every platform he's depending on regarding money - so you'd say the used car salesman of Twitch would fit right in.
But here's the problem: he has been ranting so much about paid shills, favoritism, "the elite" getting all the best opportunities and "the normal man" (meaning: DSP) getting the short end of the stick, that it's virtually impossible for him to justify what Twitch is doing/becoming.

I really wonder what his reaction is to Amazon/Twitch doing stuff like this and the mental gymnastics he has to pull off to not royally fuck himself. The funny thing is: he's fucked either way. One one hand he simply can't be positive about this stuff happening on Twitch, and on the other hand he also can't speak (too) badly of them for obvious reasons. Maybe he'll do what he normally does when a "sensitive" topic is brought up:

1) ignore it
2) (after people keep asking him questions about it) briefly address it, stating it's none of his business and he doesn't care
3) ban people for bringing it up because it's derailing the "fun", "chill" gameplay stream.

Oh well.
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Comma powiedział(a):
Not directly related to DSP (for the time being...), but interesting nonetheless: Amazon is slowly but surely uncovering their strategy on the direction Twitch as a platform is supposed to be going (according to Amazon).

Twitch Sells Out A Prime Day Special Event (1080p).mp4















Twitch Blog | This Prime Day, Twitch Sells Out

This year, our favorite made-up holiday, Amazon Prime Day, takes place July 15 & 16. To celebrate, Twitch is hosting our very own live shopping show on /twitchpresents that promises to be unlik...
blog.twitch.tv blog.twitch.tv



Wyświetl załącznik 821804

In short: they're going full homeshopping mode, presented by Twitch's biggest shills. Well, at least for one day, but it sure looks like writing on the wall to me. Btw, I'd call it "Twitch's Big Paid Shill-a-ton", but hey, I'm not smart enough to work at Amazon.

Anyway, to still somewhat tie this into the DSPhere: the whole internet knows he has been basically sucking Twitch/Amazon's dick since he returned to the platform - as he tends to do with every platform he's depending on regarding money - so you'd say the used car salesman of Twitch would fit right in.
But here's the problem: he has been ranting so much about paid shills, favoritism, "the elite" getting all the best opportunities and "the normal man" (meaning: DSP) getting the short end of the stick, that it's virtually impossible for him to justify what Twitch is doing/becoming.

I really wonder what his reaction is to Amazon/Twitch doing stuff like this and the mental gymnastics he has to pull off to not royally fuck himself. The funny thing is: he's fucked either way. One one hand he simply can't be positive about this stuff happening on Twitch, and on the other hand he also can't speak (too) badly of them for obvious reasons. Maybe he'll do what he normally does when a "sensitive" topic is being brought up:

1) ignore it
2) (after people keep asking him questions about it) briefly address it, stating it's none of his business and he doesn't care
3) start banning people for bringing it up because it's derailing the "fun" and/or "chill" gameplay stream (dood)

Oh well.
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I don't know how good of a salesman Phil would make seeing as he claimed to have only sold a dozen tshirts last year. But he can spout out some good bullshit once in a while. "The game boxes weren't empty! They had my signature on them! My signature is worth more than anything Tevin could ever do!"

"Ok, Phil. How much do you charge for an autograph?"

"Uhh, nothing. But it's still worth however much my fans think it is"
 
Salubrious powiedział(a):
Wasn't it meant for Sekiro? I remember these started right around March before the game came out. So it's four months old right now.
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I guarantee you part of the problems with the fanart/slideshow becoming stagnant is that Phil is VARIETY STREAMER now, ok? Snort. This would require Phil to actually think and change the slides before he starts every stream. Keep in mind this is the moron who did a Mario Maker stream and sat there for the whole prestream without even turning the Switch on until it was time to start gameplay.

On the topic of Phil's general quality, one of my favourite incompetent stream moves is when he is stuck on something, he will silently lean in to the chat to look for answers. Then he'll do it and act like he figured it out. This is a complete failure for a streamer that openly admits he is fine with handholding. If he is going this route, he should make that a point of discussion - he openly asks for help, reads a few suggestions out loud, then thanks the chat at least generally if it were successful. Interactive.

But Phil can't do this for three reasons.
1. Ego. Though he admits he allows handholding and will sometimes get angry and outright refuse to play until someone tells him what to do, every moment before that, he feigns figuring it out himself so that he can look competent.
2. Money. If Phil makes this a point of open conversation, then people like Papavera might get the impression that you can talk to Phil without money if you just help him. He wouldn't even read Papavera's massive Minecraft guides, he would wait for Papavera to cheer. So he's willing to sacrifice interaction in order to paywall the acknowledgement for the help he will take regardless.
3. Temperment. When Phil is frustrated, he won't keep trying or say 'that's not working for me', he'll go off on the person that tried to help him. And I think he knows this is not a good look, but he can't control himself. It's what really damaged his relationship with Swagginz. Fortunately for Phil, Swaggy is a cuck and came back, but I think flipping his shit cost him more than he thought it would.

These are the three things will always prevent him from being liked or successful in any context. At least when it even gets to these three things, because usually laziness interferes first. 2 weeks to make an Amazon wishlist for free shit... yikes.
 
Ostatnio edytowane:
Surly Muppet powiedział(a):
I guarantee you part of the problems with the fanart/slideshow becoming stagnant is that Phil is VARIETY STREAMER now, ok? Snort. This would require Phil to actually think and change the slides before he starts every stream. Keep in mind this is the moron who did a Mario Maker stream and sat there for the whole prestream without even turning the Switch on until it was time to start gameplay.

On the topic of Phil's general quality, one of my favourite incompetent stream moves is when he is stuck on something, he will silently lean in to the chat to look for answers. Then he'll do it and act like he figured it out. This is a complete failure for a streamer that openly admits he is fine with handholding. If he is going this route, he should make that a point of discussion - he openly asks for help, reads a few suggestions out loud, then thanks the chat at least generally if it were successful. Interactive.

But Phil can't do this for three reasons.
1. Ego. Though he admits he allows handholding and will sometimes get angry and outright refuse to play until someone tells him what to do, every moment before that, he feigns figuring it out himself so that he can look competent.
2. Money. If Phil makes this a point of open conversation, then people like Saru might get the impression that you can talk to Phil without money if you just help him. He wouldn't even read Saru's massive Minecraft guides, he would wait for Saru to cheer. So he's willing to sacrifice interaction in order to paywall the acknowledgement for the help he will take regardless.
3. Temperment. When Phil is frustrated, he won't keep trying or say 'that's not working for me', he'll go off on the person that tried to help him. And I think he knows this is not a good look, but he can't control himself. It's what really damaged his relationship with Swagginz. Fortunately for Phil, Swaggy is a cuck and came back, but I think flipping his shit cost him more than he thought it would.

These are the three things will always prevent him from being liked or successful in any context. At least when it even gets to these three things, because usually laziness interferes first. 2 weeks to make an Amazon wishlist for free shit... yikes.

EDIT: The amazon wishlist is all just digital gift cards because he apparently can't get digital codes for games. Because he can't allow people to give him free physical copies of games because... I guess... he'll miss some release dates, maybe? He might have to get the mail? If he did that, he could then resell it to Gamestop for additional money. He even fails at being a Twitch thot.

Phil has announced in today's prestream that he is adding the bottle crunch emote. It is absolutely amazing that he has attempted to monetize something that is a grievously incompetent move for a streamer, because for some reason, he has to crunch a bottle into the mic. For all of his talk about knowing what he is doing, the bottle crunch above all else shows his spite and stupidity, because it makes no sense. And all because he is too lazy to use his mug to promote his merch.
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On your second point, Papavera is the Minecraft guy. Saru is the guy who likes women getting punched. Saru also said he will no longer support Phil after he lost his modship, while Papavera said something along the lines of "I work with autistic children so I understand Phil and want to help him".
 
Surly Muppet powiedział(a):
If Phil makes this a point of open conversation, then people like Papavera might get the impression that you can talk to Phil without money if you just help him. He wouldn't even read Papavera's massive Minecraft guides, he would wait for Papavera to cheer. So he's willing to sacrifice interaction in order to paywall the acknowledgement for the help he will take regardless.
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If Phil wasn't such a fucking baby and wasn't full of tard rage i would even volunteer with helping him with Sekiro. I know i'm no master, but at least he would be able to prepare for eventual fuck ups he would do on his own like not realizing that Spirit Emblems don't replenish, you need money to buy a lot of stuff or that Bite Down is one of the most useful items in the game.
 
The bottle crunch emote is almost as neccessary as the bottle crunch itself.

Remember, Phil MUST crush the water bottles or else they won't all fit in the garbage. This makes perfect sense of you forget how many trash cans Phil has. Screenshot_2018-10-30-11-02-37.png
 
Sparkletor 2.0 powiedział(a):
emember, Phil MUST crush the water bottles or else they won't all fit in the garbage. This makes perfect sense of you forget how many trash cans Phil has.
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That, and they have to be done IMMEDIATELY when emptied. And when next to a microphone.
But then he laughs at the idea of ASMR, which is the only audience that might be on board with this.
 
A breakdown and a fine example of DSP guilt tripping his audience (for not giving him more money)

A) Summary of today's early stream:

0h00m music
0h26m start of pre-stream
1h27m end of pre-stream, start of gameplay
3h30m break ("It will be about a 20-minute break")
3h57m return from break (actual break time: 27 minutes)
4h06m resuming gameplay after yapping on for 9 minutes
5h35m end of gameplay
---------------------
Total broadcast duration: 5 hours and 35 minutes
Time spent actually playing a game: 3 hours and 33 minutes

B) Money made (tips, subs and bits):

$54 in tips
$27.50 in subs [11 subs * ($5 / 2)]
$7.23 in bits (might have been more, so this the minimum amount)
---------------------
Total: at least $88.73

C) Now here comes the fun part: take note of the leaderboards when 1) he started his break, and 2) when he was clocking out.

1)
Contributions before break.png


2)
Contribitions at clock-out.png


It didn't move a single bit (pun intended) for over 2 hours straight, but keep in mind the ~$90 he actually made. Now for DSP's reactions to chat "interaction":

Complaining about people not "talking" to him, 10 minutes before clocking out:
















Complaining about people "not addressing him" in chat, after clocking out (not recorded for Youtube):


















Imagine complaining about making $90 for playing a game a little over 3.5 hours in an attempt to pressure people into forking over more money. I'd fucking hate myself.
 
Ostatnio edytowane:
Comma powiedział(a):
Complaining about people "not addressing him" in chat, after clocking out (not recorded for Youtube):
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Good. Fuck him. The less ass kissing he gets the better. Because that line is just so damn sad.

You're a streamer who entertains children. They aren't supposed to care that much about you. Play your game, make funny noises, and take what you can get.
 
Comma powiedział(a):
A breakdown and a fine example of DSP guilt tripping his audience (for not giving him more money)

A) Summary of today's early stream:

0h00m music
0h26m start of pre-stream
1h27m end of pre-stream, start of gameplay
3h30m break ("It will be about a 20-minute break")
3h57m return from break (actual break time: 27 minutes)
4h06m resuming gameplay after yapping on for 9 minutes
5h35m end of gameplay
---------------------
Total broadcast duration: 5 hours and 35 minutes
Time spent actually playing a game: 3 hours and 33 minutes

B) Money made (tips, subs and bits):

$54 in tips
$27.50 in subs [11 subs * ($5 / 2)]
$7.23 in bits (might have been more, so this the minimum amount)
---------------------
Total: at least $88.73

C) Now here comes the fun part: take note of the leaderboards when 1) he started his break, and 2) when he was clocking out.

1)
Wyświetl załącznik 822665

2)
Wyświetl załącznik 822663

It didn't move a single bit (pun intended) for over 2 hours straight, but keep in mind the ~$90 he actually made. Now for DSP's reactions to chat "interaction":

Complaining about people not "talking" to him, 10 minutes before clocking out:
People stopped talking to me (stream slowed down).mp4















Complaining about people "not addressing him" in chat, after clocking out (not recorded for Youtube):
Not addressing me (unrecorded).mp4

















Imagine complaining about making $90 for playing a game a little over 3.5 hours in an attempt to pressure people into forking over more money. I'd fucking hate myself.
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The gall of this guy, not only does he demand you pay him, but he demands that you do it in a manner that is spread evenly throughout the stream in a way that also addresses him.
 
Comma powiedział(a):
Imagine complaining about making $90 for playing a game a little over 3.5 hours in an attempt to pressure people into forking over more money. I'd fucking hate myself.
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Preview of the monthly review, but fucking imagine making nearly $8700 in a month ON TWITCH ALONE and complaining about not getting enough money.
 
CausticMinory powiedział(a):
DSP basically worked a 3 hour day and got paid like $30/hour. Really should make his hard working minimum wages fans feel ever so used. But it won't, cause "Fuck that detractor talk"

It's hilarious for us though so...
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Remember though, he counts the time he starts the stream, with just letting the music run, as part of his "work" hours. Same with his shit breaks and the time between his first and second stream. Along with sitting in his awfice for an extra hour doing fucking diddly squat. He's that type of employee who will go take frequent smoke breaks on the clock, or sit on the toilet playing on his cell phone to avoid work.
 
So if Phil only made money in the first half of the stream, at it was exactly the same way the last time he played, explain to me how he had no time to contact Amazon to fix his stupid wishlist. He could have sacrificed half the stream since he regularly gets the majority of money from the prestream and beginning of gameplay. He would have lost a small amount, but would have had his wishlist up and running and potentially made more money.

Valedictorian with a degree in business.
 
Comma powiedział(a):
Complaining about people not "talking" to him, 10 minutes before clocking out:
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imagine DSP as a standup comedian
half an hour of music on a shitty boom box sitting on the stool onstage
half an hour of begging and yelling at bouncers, telling them to throw out random people
then staring blankly at the audience while shaking a tip cup
 
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