Operation Tupacalypse Days 93-94: Eli wanders the desert while stoned, searching for "Da Jew Peeramidz"

[Linako 2.0]

I swear guys.
Eli's exploits need to be recorded and become an epic poem to be remembered for generations to come.
it's like if Don Quixote met the Odyssey.

 

[Superior Watermelon]

I swear guys.
Eli's exploits need to be recorded and become an epic poem to be remembered for generations to come.
it's like if Don Quixote met the Odyssey.
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The Chilliad® and The 420ddesy® brought to you by Dewritos®® DeagleNation®®® Flavor®®®®

 

[Smutley]

Eli's travel authorisation expired yesterday.

I guess we'll see how well Tyce's Easy Legal Schemes® work when he attempts to leave.

What exactly happens when your travel visa expires? I haven't had a chance to leave the country, and I don't have a clue about any of that.

 

[BillRiley]

What exactly happens when your travel visa expires? I haven't had a chance to leave the country, and I don't have a clue about any of that.

Not a lot. Eli Superspy can renew his visa for a fee when it expires. He'll be back to whacking off in hostels and playing runescrape in no time.

 

[TheAmazingAxolotl]

I swear guys.
Eli's exploits need to be recorded and become an epic poem to be remembered for generations to come.

I can sense Tupac's newest rap album once Eli frees him from the Jew peeramids.

 

[Randall Fragg]

So, last we heard from Eli he was probably somewhere near Mt. Ramon and going to investigate a "possible Islam airfield".
Could someone look that area up on Google Earth? Because I suspect Eli may be attempting to parkour onto an Israeli military base.

 

[dalegribbler]

So, last we heard from Eli he was probably somewhere near Mt. Ramon and going to investigate a "possible Islam airfield".
Could someone look that area up on Google Earth? Because I suspect Eli may be attempting to parkour onto an Israeli military base.

Do we know if he's at Mt. Ramon, or his group was just headed to it? And where did his group depart from? Did he take a bus down there? There is no way that camel tourist thing was a long journey.

 

[slc115]

So, last we heard from Eli he was probably somewhere near Mt. Ramon and going to investigate a "possible Islam airfield".
Could someone look that area up on Google Earth? Because I suspect Eli may be attempting to parkour onto an Israeli military base.

From what I saw, depending whether he's still on his journey to Mt. Ramon or actually near there, it's either Hatzerim Airbase for the former, and a town called Mitzpe Ramon for the latter.

 

[Tookie]

I can sense Tupac's newest rap album once Eli frees him from the Jew peeramids.

If Tupac is in fact a rap mummy now, he might not be in shape to make another album even if Eli rescues him.

 

[Burned Man]

If Tupac is in fact a rap mummy now, he might not be in shape to make another album even if Eli rescues him.

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Well we know one member of Deagle Nation that might be happier with a mummy version of Tupac.

Eli wandering the desert with only the lights to guide him, looking for the king of rap bearing the gift Runescape. Its just a shame that Jace and Tyce didn't join him so we could have three wise marines.

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

Basic math:
-Selling weed makes an insane amount of money. Jace and Tyce have AN ENTIRE CABIN filled with weed they are selling as well as several people they've enlisted to help sling it.
-Jace makes $926 a month from welfare.
-The swords Jace+Tyce are buying cost around $30 each, as evidenced by the fact that Tyce said he ordered a "shitload" but the total came to only $70.
Eli does not order a different hooker every day. As far as we know that was a one-time incident.
-We don't know exaclty how much Eli is actually being given as an "allowance" but we know he's been staying at hostels a lot.
-We are not IRS agents, we have not performed a complete audit of Deagle Nation, and therefore we don't know the specifics of Jace/Tyce's spending and how much of it is being devoted to Eli vs. how much is being spent on random shit.

Again, I don't mean to rant, but sometimes I'm unhappy about being the only one who seems to be willing/able to explain these things.

You forgot to account the money they're making from fencing goods Tyce "The Heist" stole from garage sales

 

[Dutchbash]

-Selling weed makes an insane amount of money. Jace and Tyce have AN ENTIRE CABIN filled with weed they are selling as well as several people they've enlisted to help sling it.

This actually worries me a bit. I hope Eli comes home soon and stops this growing op before Jace gets v& by the police and thrown in jail for a few years.
Our Pet Marine lolcow needs to stay on the online and out of the offline yo

Oh and Tyce would also be arrested, but I think is dad would get him out of it on account of Jace's state of mind etc. Meaning Jace goes in the offline for even longer

 

[ChuckSlaughter]

Basic math:
-Selling weed makes an insane amount of money. Jace and Tyce have AN ENTIRE CABIN filled with weed they are selling as well as several people they've enlisted to help sling it.
-Jace makes $926 a month from welfare.
-The swords Jace+Tyce are buying cost around $30 each, as evidenced by the fact that Tyce said he ordered a "shitload" but the total came to only $70.
Eli does not order a different hooker every day. As far as we know that was a one-time incident.
-We don't know exaclty how much Eli is actually being given as an "allowance" but we know he's been staying at hostels a lot.
-We are not IRS agents, we have not performed a complete audit of Deagle Nation, and therefore we don't know the specifics of Jace/Tyce's spending and how much of it is being devoted to Eli vs. how much is being spent on random shit.

Again, I don't mean to rant, but sometimes I'm unhappy about being the only one who seems to be willing/able to explain these things.

Ok I can see this with 926 in welfare but it all still adds up to be a sizable chunk of change. It makes sense that there was the hostile talk about Eli between tyce and jace in the store. The cabin's vacancy and birth of tyce's easy money scheme line up.... but I don't think selling weed actually makes that much money unless you have steady traffic. I don't think jace lives anywhere where you can get away with blatantly sitting on a corner selling dimes to people every few minutes. I know a man who does just this and he's not rich. I read somewhere that most weed dealers barely make minimum wage.
Also you misunderstand what I've said. I didn't say he was getting a hooker every day, but I was pointing out that his tugboat from jace is at least large enough to pay for a hooker and a less than great hotel instead of the better one he apparently normally stays at.
Also unless they rig up expensive lights and stuff they're not going to grow a ton of weed in the cabin and I just can't imagine these guys actually managing to grow weed, even with really hearty mexican ditchweed that grows anywhere you drop it, indoors the sprouts will grow to the light source and topple over and die.
Kyle might be helping them but why does jace act like getting a place of his own is so hard? All he has to do is offer to pay a ton in advance and it's common for landlords to call it good even if you're an idiot with no income. Why doesn't jace just live in the cabin?

I know it's DN so expecting rational actors is stupid.

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

Ok I can see this with 926 in welfare but it all still adds up to be a sizable chunk of change. It makes sense that there was the hostile talk about Eli between tyce and jace in the store. The cabin's vacancy and birth of tyce's easy money scheme line up.... but I don't think selling weed actually makes that much money unless you have steady traffic. I don't think jace lives anywhere where you can get away with blatantly sitting on a corner selling dimes to people every few minutes. I know a man who does just this and he's not rich. I read somewhere that most weed dealers barely make minimum wage.
Also you misunderstand what I've said. I didn't say he was getting a hooker every day, but I was pointing out that his tugboat from jace is at least large enough to pay for a hooker and a less than great hotel instead of the better one he apparently normally stays at.
Also unless they rig up expensive lights and stuff they're not going to grow a ton of weed in the cabin and I just can't imagine these guys actually managing to grow weed, even with really hearty mexican ditchweed that grows anywhere you drop it, indoors the sprouts will grow to the light source and topple over and die.
Kyle might be helping them but why does jace act like getting a place of his own is so hard? All he has to do is offer to pay a ton in advance and it's common for landlords to call it good even if you're an idiot with no income. Why doesn't jace just live in the cabin?

I know it's DN so expecting rational actors is stupid.

People who grow don't sell dimebags, they sell it in bulk amounts at wholesale rates to drug dealers/massive potheads who buy weed by the quarter pound.

SOURCE: I ain't no snitch.

 

[ChuckSlaughter]

People who grow don't sell dimebags, they sell it in bulk amounts at wholesale rates to drug dealers/massive potheads who buy weed by the quarter pound.

SOURCE: I ain't no snitch.

I just have a hard time believing they can produce that much. The only thing that makes any sense to me is that kyle has a major hand in helping them out. Maybe even setting the whole thing up and then telling them what to do. Anyhow this is my last post in this thread about this topic.

 

[Linako 2.0]

If Tupac is in fact a rap mummy now, he might not be in shape to make another album even if Eli rescues him.

Wyświetl załącznik 7898

 

[dalegribbler]

I had someone look at the photos and tell me that he is here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Qumran

This makes more sense.

 

[Kosher Dill]

I had someone look at the photos and tell me that he is here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Qumran

OK Fagggz I Found Sum Jew Scrolls In A Jar In Da Peeramid & I Used Them 2 Roll A Huge Joint Haaaa

 

[DeagleDad420]

Also unless they rig up expensive lights and stuff they're not going to grow a ton of weed in the cabin and I just can't imagine these guys actually managing to grow weed, even with really hearty mexican ditchweed that grows anywhere you drop it, indoors the sprouts will grow to the light source and topple over and die.

Are you saying that Jace, Tyce and Colby as a team are incapable of buying or rigging lights?

I mean, I don't really know what to say to that. They do dress themselves in the morning, you know. Lolcows do not automatically and catastrophically fail at every single thing they ever attempt.

Kyle might be helping them but why does jace act like getting a place of his own is so hard? All he has to do is offer to pay a ton in advance and it's common for landlords to call it good even if you're an idiot with no income.

• Have you been following the saga in the last month? Jace has repeatedly talked about his problems of how no landlords will rent to him ever because he's a schizo manchild. He's offered to pay drug money before and it hasn't helped.
  
• I take it you haven't rented before. Landlords literally do not function like that. They scrutinize the tenant, they don't just look at the money; you have to understand that tenants are a liability. The hypothetical landlord you are describing literally doesn't care about what damage is done to his building, whether or not the cops are called, whether or not he has to replace a door when a DEA team busts it in, whether or not these fuckers make enough noise to keep up all the other tenants, whether or not... well, the list goes on. Basically, that landlord does not exist and will never exist.

Why doesn't jace just live in the cabin?

Because the entire thing (it's a small cabin, btw) is filled every single sq ft with grow lights and weed and infested with mice which they believe are carrying Ebola. Would you want to live in a place like that? Could you, even?

I just have a hard time believing they can produce that much. The only thing that makes any sense to me is that kyle has a major hand in helping them out. Maybe even setting the whole thing up and then telling them what to do.

Like I said, I don't really know what you want me or anyone else to say, or why you would post that in the first place. "I don't believe" is not something that any of us can really help with or comment on in any meaningful way past the point of people trying to help explain the saga to you. Continuing to post doesn't really advance the discussion. I don't mean to sound mean or condescending or whatever, but please put some more thought into it before you post in a thread.

 

[Mauvman Shuffleboard]

Lolcows do not automatically and catastrophically fail at every single thing they ever attempt.

This here is what makes following lolcows so strange, it seems that very few people realize that not everything a lolcow does is stupid/funny. Jace and the gang are generally pretty dumb, but people seem to think that because they're dumb they have to be wrong about literally everything and can't do anything right. Lolcows are looked at so negatively that even when they're right or good at something everyone goes out of their way to justify the opposite. They used to call Chris retarded for not selling Sonichu merchandise because it would make him money, then they called him retarded for selling it because it's making him money. When you try to fit all the content to conform to the most retarded conclusion you miss out on what's actually interesting.

It's why I didn't like it when people thought voting for Jace to play complex games he was unfamiliar with would be funny, it never was. Nobody is innately familiar with the mechanics and objectives of Dwarf Fortress or Crusader Kings II, he wasn't failing at them because he was retarded, it's because learning takes time and what kind of loser would read all the instructions when trying to make an entertaining stream? He might be dumb too, but it's kind of like laughing at a 4th grader for not being able to integrate trigonometric functions, there's no way of telling if they'd be able to get it one day and it's not particularly surprising that they didn't understand what to do.

I guess what I'm trying to say here is Jace and his friends are dumb stoners, but that doesn't mean everything that they ever do must be pants-shittingly retarded A broken clock is still right twice a day and all.