Iran Crisis & the 2026 War between Iran and the United States, Gulf States, and Israel - Please focus on news and coverage, not argumentation.

[Onepumpplumpchump]

Those fools have no idea they just unleashed Iran's ultra-secret-super-duper-hyper missiles.
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What is this the 5th time they said theyre declaring total war. Is this true promise 6?

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

Have they raised the flag of Total War yet though?

 

[Burnt Fish]

What is this the 5th time they said theyre declaring total war. Is this true promise 6?

they have to re-declare war every time Trump says we've won

 

[ConsentAccidentVictimNo98]

The UK has two aircraft carriers (and thanks to Labour), no amphibious landing craft (aka those "totally not aircraft carriers," please ignore the VTOL aircraft). And those two aircraft carriers couldn't allow the British to project power. They literally cannot protect Cyprus and Deago Garcia at the same time without US support. It's quite sad. Please don't look into the V-bombers if you don't want your day ruined.

The Amphibious Warfare ships (Albion Class) did not carry fighters, and did not have a flight deck. It only had helicopter capabilities for up to a Chinock. But, Britain did have a Helicopter Carrier, which probably could have been refitted into being used for F-35s. It was sold to Brazil after 20 years (a lot of British ships get sold there). And despite it being at the "end of its life" in Bri'ish terms, Brazil still uses it.

 

[Foltest]

Have they raised the flag of Total War yet though?

it get destroyed because the lint filter were broken.

 

[IAmNotAlpharius]

The Iranian brass must be so paranoid right now. Imagine having to eyeball all your remaining comrades, as each assassination increases the chances of them being a Mossad agent.
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I vaguely remember playing a game as a child where you have to root out the mafia/werewolf as they slowly pick you off.

It’s a real life game of Werewolf.

Yup that’s what it’s called.

>tfw I'm not paid with a Big Milkers Khazar GF for being a Jewish Propaganda agent
>They won't give me a Persian Princess GF either
Why live ?

They’re really getting cheap these days. But at least they’re not promising you 72 xeno or daemon scum in the afterlife.

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Here’s an edit

The founder of their regime has some choice quotes about how old a girl should be when she's married off.

But that’s his culture which is heckin valid and wholesome because they respect trains rights.

 

[3-2-1836]

The Iranian brass must be so paranoid right now. Imagine having to eyeball all your remaining comrades, as each assassination increases the chances of them being a Mossad agent.
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How's Esmail Qaani doing these days?

 

[Quindoll]

https://www.timesofisrael.com/liveblog_entry/iran-says-it-will-attack-energy-sites-in-gulf-after-israeli-strike-on-gas-field/

Archive is letting me down



Finally some real anti-oil activism:

 

[RetardMaxxer]

https://www.timesofisrael.com/liveblog_entry/iran-says-it-will-attack-energy-sites-in-gulf-after-israeli-strike-on-gas-field/

Archive is letting me down

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Finally some real anti-oil activism:
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Why are they bothering to warn about this shit? Just fucking sperg out and hit every viable energy platform and hope things get better after the super great depression part 2 electric boogaloo.

 

[SneedOnTheBeach]

So the NYT are reporting that the 'laundry fire' on Gerald Ford took over 30 hours to put out, and 600 faggots are now without a bunk.
I'm 100% sure that this started because a washing machine broke down, and totally not anything to do with Iran. The Pentagon would never lie to us. Ever. Nope.

ths Bismark being hit with a deadly laundry room fire circa 1941
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"Help me step torpedo my head is stuck in the lint filter"

Pretty shameful that a multi billion dollar piece of hardware was knocked out of the Red Sea theater by a pair of underwear starting a laundry fire.

A defeat of this scale, at this critical time might have sealed the US Navy's fate.

 

[CaliforniaRaisin]

Have they raised the flag of Total War yet though?

I've never played Total War. But everyone knows it from those ridiculous, screaming men on the cover.

 

[Dojima's Dragon]

Muhammad had a boyfriend he would claim was visiting him, using the cover that he was receiving visions from the angel Gabriel. he claimed dogs made it so angels would not enter his home, and had his wife's dog killed, and the dogs surrounding their home, which would bark loudly when 'Gabriel' would visit him.

This has EXTREMELY hilarious (and horrifying implications) when you consider that dogs in zoroastrianism ward off evil spirits. Which means that Gabriel was probably a servant of the devil.

No but they are aryan.

May ahura bless you with an autistic persian former lesbian gf mein fellow aryan. Always remember our lords name when you're at a bonfire. For he gives his children peace and protection from evil(gaynigger muslims).

Why are the origins of islam a fucking comedy show?

...a comedy show that 2 billion people follow

Habibispeak like this is almost... mashed together.

God im so glad cursive didn't take off. Shit was borderline unreadable.

UAE might as well just declare themselves Jewish at this point with how many missiles Iran keeps autistically launching at them.

I mean given all the memes about them being turbo jewish and being widely hated for their positive relationship with the jews by muslims. Yeah, it's much more nuanced than that.
Oh and ig having a synagogue in abu dhabi
@Catch The Rainbow hey, about we have a kosher wine party in here! are goys allowed in synagogues?

 

[Necrosan]

Why are they bothering to warn about this shit? Just fucking sperg out and hit every viable energy platform and hope things get better after the super great depression part 2 electric boogaloo.

Because they are totally going to do it, they just have performance anxiety.

 

[ThisIsGonnaBeGood]

https://www.timesofisrael.com/liveblog_entry/iran-says-it-will-attack-energy-sites-in-gulf-after-israeli-strike-on-gas-field/

Archive is letting me down

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Finally some real anti-oil activism:
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Literally the first thing they did after the war started was target Gulf oil infrastructure. What the fuck are they talking about? Just because they suck at hitting anything doesn't mean they haven't been trying.

 

[ChooChooChooseMe]

Idk If I believe it was a laundry fire. I feel like the lint issue was solved in wwii. We might be telling a fib for morale -- we might find out in a year or two

Has anyone already noticed the ridiculousness of the Gerald Ford essentially tripping over themselves. It's like they cursed themselves by naming it after a President with a stigma for being clumsy

 

[The Great Ducktator]

What is this the 5th time they said theyre declaring total war. Is this true promise 6?

Everytime Trump declares victory, they need to redeclare war.

 

[XYZpdq Jr.]

Archive is letting me down

megalo don't blow

https://megalodon.jp/2026-0318-2311-41/https://www.timesofisrael.com:443/liveblog_entry/iran-says-it-will-attack-energy-sites-in-gulf-after-israeli-strike-on-gas-field/

 

[CaptainAutism69]

Why is everything to you a conspiracy?
The US Gerald Ford basically came with sewage issues since it launch.
When you have a crew of 5000 people the washing machine catching on fire is just another tuesday on the vessel.

We know that Iran fired at Gerald. We know that it would be a colossal embarrassment if it got out that Iran managed to damage the pride and joy of the American Navy. We know that the ship is supposed to have fire suppressant systems that should be able to deal with a small localised fire in a laundry room.
Anyway, it looks like Old Gerald is leaving the area for repairs in Crete, so I'm sure some shipwatcher will be taking photos as it enters dock and any damage signs will be clear to see (or covered up)

 

[RetardMaxxer]

I've never played Total War. But everyone knows it from those ridiculous, screaming men on the cover.
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You should play total war. Especially shogun 2, Rome 2, warhammer 1-3, medieval 2 and maybe Pharoah. Amazing series.

 

[Onepumpplumpchump]

Why are they bothering to warn about this shit? Just fucking sperg out and hit every viable energy platform and hope things get better after the super great depression part 2 electric boogaloo.

The IRGC like other sandnigger kind have the need to declare when theyre going to strike because of constant inbreeding and goat fucking. The question is now will they actually do anything. Probably not because theyre too busy dressing like women and hiding in bank vaults.