Ask men why they do things the way they do and maybe you'll get an honest answer

[BeckhoffAX5702]

I don't think so. Honestly mad respect for the brave men and women that have the massive balls to ask people out, because this sucks.

You could always make an enterance to the group. I mean, if you have something in common, i.e. the same class going by your prior comment, then there are possibilities.
Examples: You could go in with questions regarding the topics of the lecture/material, or going with a bit of humor if the lecturer has a funny accent or misspoke some term.

That's how I usually approach groups at any social gathering whom I don't know. During conversations I actively scan the vibe whether we all "click", sometimes the vibe doesn't click and that's perfectly ok.

 

[Kofi Drinka]

I don't want to shit up the thread more so I'll post one last time, since I already got my answers and some good advice, but I don't think I'm this amazing prize ya know... I am just a decently pretty girl, and I've never had anyone tell me or imply the opposite. I don't want you guys to think I'm this 9/10 bombshell, if I were I wouldn't be here asking for dating advice lol.

People don't generally tell women they're ugly. It's quite the social taboo to tell people they're hideous.

And you're right I don't know him. I want to talk to him so I can know what he's like, and see if he's actually a cool person or if this was just a silly crush.

This is why men hate women.. You're drooling over a chad and refusing to engage. Then rejecting every man who approaches because he's not the chad you don't even know.

 

[Wigger Rights Advocate]

This is why men hate women.. You're drooling over a chad and refusing to engage. Then rejecting every man who approaches because he's not the chad you don't even know.

What... he's not a chad, he's just a nerdy looking guy that seems smart. And yes I'm going to reject men that are either not my type, or that send me weird DMs, why would I lead a man on if I'm not into him?

Seriously why do so many men think women only like chads, that's not the case...

 

[Kofi Drinka]

What... he's not a chad, he's just a nerdy looking guy that seems smart. And yes I'm going to reject men that are either not my type, or that send me weird DMs, why would I lead a man on if I'm not into him?

Seriously why do so many men think women only like chads, that's not the case...

You're drooling over a guy you literally know nothing about. To the point where you're on the farms asking for tips on talking to him. There is some reason for it and it's not just you like his glasses.

It's really fucking weird the way women work and don't understand why it annoys men.

 

[Waffle Iron]

I'm just upset that I attract men that I want nothing to do with, and not the men that I like But I do think I'm cute. And I do need to work on the RBF.

Well, I didn't know that. From the outside it is a tonal whiplash to read "Im too bitchy and autistic to approach" and "do you think guys can be intimidated by a woman that's too pretty". (apparently there are guys that approach you so you are approachable enough, even if they're not the type of you guy youre interested in).

because this sucks.

It does. And I don't think he will randomly decide that he wants to get to know you better. I never thought I would type this, but maybe instagram is your best bet. Just think of anything you could reasonably put in a message, it doesn't really matter, that you send him a message out of the blue is the real message.

edit:
now I think about it, I think the real question you're trying to ask is "why does this guy I like not approach me, while other men do". I don't think working on your facial expression will work, you'll have to bite the bullet and DM him.

 

[Twix Eatr]

In person I don't get approached a lot. I do put on a mean mug because I don't want people approaching me (safety 101 when you're out in the city of crackheads). I've had family/friends tell me that people stare a lot at me, but I don't notice. I mostly get hit on by coworkers or online.
Recently I removed my profile pictures, removed a bunch of men from my followers, blocked, etc because it was making me so anxious. I barely post anything anymore because there's always some weirdo that doesn't take polite rejection, and I don't even post anything inappropriate...

I've also been on several 'dates', where I didn't know it was an actual date until years later. I feel like autistic girls will understand what I'm talking about.

Edit: I just realized while typing this that, in a desperate attempt to avoid creepy men, I may also be pushing away nice men that I like. I will reflect on this. Thank you kiwis for your input.

Can you fit in a rowboat?

It bothers me that you're not answering the question. Would an average size rowboat support you without capsizing?

 

[Wigger Rights Advocate]

It bothers me that you're not answering the question. Would an average size rowboat support you without capsizing?

I'm 110 lbs. I've never been on any kind of boat. That's not why this man doesn't pay attention to me though or maybe he's a boat guy and I don't know that yet

 

[Harvey Danger]

Spoken like someone who got to choose their struggles.

I never thought it was a choice. 90% of the ways you can be likable to one sex don't repel the other sex. If they did, basic society wouldn't work. (People who maximize the other 10% of ways are the ones we consider obnoxious or creepy.)

The question was an extreme hypothetical to force a choice. I was taking the question as "which gender's social benefits are you willing to give up", but I work with and am friends with too many men to trade them away just to get more female attention. If you ask an incel, maybe he'll give you a different answer, and the difference between us is his desperation. Or maybe he's also been rejected by men because he's 10%-maxxing.

 

[Kofi Drinka]

The question was an extreme hypothetical to force a choice. I was taking the question as "which gender's social benefits are you willing to give up", but I work with and am friends with too many men to trade them away just to get more female attention. If you ask an incel, maybe he'll give you a different answer, and the difference between us is his desperation. Or maybe he's also been rejected by men because he's 10%-maxxing.

The problem is the question you're asking is really simple.

"Do you want to have a family and kids" vs "Do you want to have lots of male friends". Well obviously most men would pick the former. Or they would pick fucking everything that moves with tits. It's not a contest between good male friends and your choice of any woman you want to marry and have kids with. It took me no time at all to decide because a family is so much more than your friends are, no matter how good those friends are.

 

[DavidS877]

It's always funny that women don't seem to understand why men won't approach them. Whereas on the men's side it's been beaten into us to never approach women in a place they can't get away, so nothing at work, school, church, the grocery store, etc basically never any place where she's forced to interact with you or will have to see you again the next day/class/whatever.

 

[souschef]

the woman-hate thread is cringe and my only post there was put there non-consensually by a mod.

Funny, for some reason i have a post there talking about bolognese and i don't remember making it

 

[56 others]

I've never been on any kind of boat.

Honestly horrifying. Just nut up and ask if he wants to get coffee or something next time you catch him on campus.

 

[Kofi Drinka]

Funny, for some reason i have a post there talking about bolognese and i don't remember making it

The women hate thread is funny. If we ever need a virgin sacrifice we know where we can find some very angry virgins.

 

[souschef]

The women hate thread is funny. If we ever need a virgin sacrifice we know where we can find some very angry virgins.

I stay clear off both genderhate-threads, they exude a sexual frustration energy that i don't really like



At least my post is a beacon of hope in that cesspit, for whatever fucking reason i posted this there

 

[Harvey Danger]

"Do you want to have a family and kids" vs "Do you want to have lots of male friends". Well obviously most men would pick the former.

Sure, which is why I didn't take the question that way. We'd have to exclude your wife/fiance/girlfriend from the question, because otherwise you're basically asking "would you like to get divorced?" If you don't have a wife yet, and we can't exclude your future wife from the hater pool, then it's basically asking "how desperate are you right now?" Neither question is very useful.

If we're excluding partners or family, and I'm facing that choice right now, then having men hate me likely gets me fired from my job, kicked out of my church, and loses me half of my neighbors and friends. It also kills a lot of my future projects and plans. Having women hate me just loses me the other half of my neighbors and friends instead. I don't think gaining their "adoration" compensates for the other problems I'd have from men hating me.

I suppose there's a wild 3rd way to take the question, some pact with the devil where you sacrifice your family (current or future) in exchange for worldly success and popularity. I don't think "respected and admired" by men guarantees that, so I didn't treat it that way; we'd have to rephrase the question to be clearer. But then we aren't really talking about men and women any more, rather which sphere you personally value more, or what your morality measures. (I wouldn't take that deal.)

 

[Nick Wilde]

I'm just upset that I attract men that I want nothing to do with, and not the men that I like

Yeah you and everyone else on the planet, sweetheart. Why can't I attract anything but goth girls with huge tits and cluster B personality disorders when all I want is a cute curvy nerd with glasses? Well, because. You just have to deal it.

 

[Twix Eatr]

I'm 110 lbs. I've never been on any kind of boat. That's not why this man doesn't pay attention to me though or maybe he's a boat guy and I don't know that yet

Ok, you're at least a 6 then. You should take @BeckhoffAX5702 advice and insult your foreign teacher for speaking the language wrong. "So what's up with Professor Ching Chong talking about 'suppry and demand', am I right? And speaking of fresh off the boat, I've never even been on a boat. Any of you nerds want to take me on one? I put out."

 

[Kofi Drinka]

Sure, which is why I didn't take the question that way. We'd have to exclude your wife/fiance/girlfriend from the question, because otherwise you're basically asking "would you like to get divorced?" If you don't have a wife yet, and we can't exclude your future wife from the hater pool, then it's basically asking "how desperate are you right now?" Neither question is very useful.

If we're excluding partners or family, and I'm facing that choice right now, then having men hate me likely gets me fired from my job, kicked out of my church, and loses me half of my neighbors and friends. It also kills a lot of my future projects and plans. Having women hate me just loses me the other half of my neighbors and friends instead. I don't think gaining their "adoration" compensates for the other problems I'd have from men hating me.

I suppose there's a wild 3rd way to take the question, some pact with the devil where you sacrifice your family (current or future) in exchange for worldly success and popularity. I don't think "respected and admired" by men guarantees that, so I didn't treat it that way; we'd have to rephrase the question to be clearer. But then we aren't really talking about men and women any more, rather which sphere you personally value more, or what your morality measures. (I wouldn't take that deal.)

If you're excluding all that stuff then it's not a real contest again either. If you have a wife and kids you don't care about other women desiring you unless you're looking to cheat. So then you pick your wife + men since men make better friends than women do.

I think your question doesn't really work.

 

[Shakira Flabbergasted]

It's almost always the opposite of the joke, btw. Ask people who clean.

Sorry for being late and gay, but I was in a women's room at the mall once and there was pee on the WALL. How does it even get there????? To this day it haunts me.

 

[Arbiter]

How do you guys fall asleep so quickly?