💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Falcon Sebben]

Even cheese straight out of the fridge will melt properly if you place them on the patties while in the pan, i do it often so that it doesn't get too soft as i manipulate it. Take out of the fridge, place on top of the patties, drop one or two drops of water on the skillet and cover it for a few seconds, then immediately assemble it

Thing is, those patties were cold, room temp. Either the retard took forever to assemble that monstrosity or there were almost no heat during cooking, which is probable because he overcrowded the pan and there's no color to those burgers

I say confidently that those are the worst burgers i've ever seen

He was just retarded because he didn't understand the basics of cooking.

Yes the idea behind a very lean meat like bison is you cook it medium rare at most. This means one of two things. Either high heat and maybe 1-2 minutes on each side or a medium heat and maybe up to 4 minutes per side. The idea is to cook the outside and get the middle warm enough but not keep it raw. His burger had to be cold in the middle meaning it was cooked blue at best.

The cold cheese is fine... if you stick it on the patty and let the heat melt it a bit. But no it was cold from the fridge and put on a cold burger so it doesn't melt.

And the fact he said it was "perfectly done" as he always says, shows the man literally has no clue in his head.

I do genuinely wonder if him and Kay have a small audience of people who actually follow their recipes, I fucking hope not but one wonders.....

Yes Fatty has fans. But based on the pictures of them they're all retards like him and some look like they're missing several chromosomes. In other words not the best examples of humanity.

As for Kay she knows she's a shit cook and while I would never eat any of her attempts at cooking there's something almost charming about her because there's no pretense. It was like Simply Sara. She was this enormously fat woman who had cooking videos and while some of them were disgusting, she had some legit decent recipes if you toned down the sugar and the mayo in them.

And he's gay.

I love how everything about Fatty comes back to his love of sucking on a big dick. It's one of those constants in life.

 

[AnOminous]

Yes the idea behind a very lean meat like bison is you cook it medium rare at most. This means one of two things. Either high heat and maybe 1-2 minutes on each side or a medium heat and maybe up to 4 minutes per side.

This is where sous vide comes in (yeah I know). There's the guaranteed "safe temperature" the FDA gives, but that's just if it gets to that temperature it's guaranteed safe. However, you can get lower temperatures safe by doing it the right length of time.

Even at 125 for quite rare, a couple hours will guarantee it's safe. The FDA temperature is not a mandate, just a safety precaution. You can kill all the harmful bacteria by doing it at a lower temperature longer. Then you can do the high temperature sear on screaming cast iron for a minute or so on each side, and end up with hot pink inside and still safe, with the crust you want.

Everything else he did was so shit that even with an actual burger that wasn't mooing (or whatever noise bison make) it would still have sucked. Pouring his toxic sludge-like bogus teriyaki on it in enormous quantities fucked it up by itself.

Also sous vide keeps an already inclined to dryness meat fairly moist, even if you get dumb and decide to do it well.

 

[Vect]

For some reason his 3 ingredient Lazy Man's Mac and Cheese showed up on my feed, I guess because I watch a channel called Off The Hook where they made his food.

I notice the instructions are literally on the back of his pack of pasta so it's not really his recipe.



I'll be perfectly honest, considering it's a carb filled guilty pleasure anyway, it's probably the most appetising thing I've seem him make in a while. Using the pasta starch and evaporated milk in place of a roux is kind of clever. He talks about blue cheese and hot sauce as potential secret ingredients, but he could have just added the classic spice blend of black pepper, nutmeg, cayenne and onion powder and it would probably taste pretty good. I'm actually going to try it alongside a tomato salad to cut through the richness.

 

[densedance]

And the fact he said it was "perfectly done" as he always says, shows the man literally has no clue in his head.

And the closing shot when he took a bit, moved his head up & down as if he has approval from the yodoob crowd with that smirk?
He's a malignant cunt.

 

[Shartavius]

I laugh sadistically every time Stroked-the-Fuck-Out Jack v5.0 covers his mouth like a Japanese school girl to giggle about the obviously horrible slop he just taste-tested; because I know he's going to follow it up by pointing down toward his diaper and gurgling "THAT's a home run!" as though some homeless guy's load is causing his mouth to go numb.

It's insane to me how Jack convinced himself that lying in this manner somehow dignifies the rest of the video.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

This is where sous vide comes in (yeah I know).

I'm well aware of how sous vide can work especially for things like this.

And so long as you do it long enough, like a couple hours, there's no way bacteria could survive it.

 

[p1138]

I notice the instructions are literally on the back of his pack of pasta so it's not really his recipe.

Of course it's not his recipe, it's never his recipe. Sometimes he acknowledges he got a recipe from elsewhere, sometimes he just steals recipes and pretends he came up with shit on his own.

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

Of course it's not his recipe, it's never his recipe. Sometimes he acknowledges he got a recipe from elsewhere, sometimes he just steals recipes and pretends he came up with shit on his own.

If the recipe include Jack Daniel’s or cheddar jack cheese, it is HIS recipe in Jack’s toddler brain.

 

[Major]

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Jesus fucking Christ he's fat. Really faaaaaat. FAAAAAT

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

If the recipe include Jack Daniel’s or cheddar jack cheese, it is HIS recipe in Jack’s toddler brain.

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Fatty and Hammy need to read Matthew 6:5-6
“And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you."
That would mean don't stage a photo of your fat ass praying for social media

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

Fatty and Hammy need to read Matthew 6:5-6
“And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you."
That would mean don't stage a photo of your fat ass praying for social media

To be fair he didn’t take that pic. Thats a screengrab from their church’s “pray before you pray” thing where all of the early birds go and get some extra church in.

 

[Shartavius]

Fatty and Hammy need to read Matthew 6:5-6
“And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you."
That would mean don't stage a photo of your fat ass praying for social media

*Jack does his best Tails Gets Trolled face of indignation*: "U dognt kneed to dell mgme wahts inth a BYE-BULL. OH GAY? I'VE REDDIT ATE THYMEZ. ATE. I GNO WAZZIZEZZ. NEGGS QUEZ-CHIN." *wet cough into fist*

 

[AltisticRight]

4 or so strokes will do that

Not enough. More in 2026 please.

cayenne and onion powder and it would probably taste pretty good.

I like adding pancetta bits and breadcrumbs to my mac and cheese. Well, I use conchiglie (shells) for mine because they soak up all the unhealthy sauce. It's hard to fuck this up.

 

[Tiresome]

Not enough. More in 2026 please.

I like adding pancetta bits and breadcrumbs to my mac and cheese. Well, I use conchiglie (shells) for mine because they soak up all the unhealthy sauce. It's hard to fuck this up.

Sautee some onions and sweet peppers to throw in, you'll add lots of flavor while arguably making it even a bit healthier, ounce for ounce. Not to mention jalapenos, pickled or fresh, are fantastic in mac and cheese.

 

[p1138]

Sautee some onions and sweet peppers to throw in, you'll add lots of flavor while arguably making it even a bit healthier, ounce for ounce. Not to mention jalapenos, pickled or fresh, are fantastic in mac and cheese.

Pancetta or guanciale with sun dried tomatoes in the mac and cheese with a pile of fresh basil on top is great.

 

[Tiresome]

Pancetta or guanciale with sun dried tomatoes in the mac and cheese with a pile of fresh basil on top is great.

Basically mac and cheese is like eggs, it's a blank, savory palette that goes with almost anything.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Of course it's not his recipe, it's never his recipe. Sometimes he acknowledges he got a recipe from elsewhere, sometimes he just steals recipes and pretends he came up with shit on his own.

My favorite is when he says, "the recipe is below" and it never is.

If the recipe include Jack Daniel’s or cheddar jack cheese, it is HIS recipe in Jack’s toddler brain.

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Where's the Scooty puff? There's no way Fatty made his way all the way to the front without it.

Jesus fucking Christ he's fat. Really faaaaaat. FAAAAAT

Obviously carnivore hasn't helped him. I wonder why?

Not enough. More in 2026 please.

I like adding pancetta bits and breadcrumbs to my mac and cheese. Well, I use conchiglie (shells) for mine because they soak up all the unhealthy sauce. It's hard to fuck this up.

Bacon, pancetta, guanciale or some other smoked and cured type things go well. Jalapenos, tomatoes, scallions and a whole host of other things including crab and lobster meat can belong in mac & cheese. It's a canvas that can include so many things.

You like nachos? You can make your mac & cheese with nacho fixings.
You like cheeseburgers? You can make your mac & cheese with cheeseburger toppings including ground beef.

And sure, it's a sometimes food because lets face it, it's not the healthiest thing out there but sometimes you just say "fuck it" and make it anyway.

 

[Enig]

If the recipe include Jack Daniel’s or cheddar jack cheese, it is HIS recipe in Jack’s toddler brain.

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This is proof Jack is a living god, he has managed to master the perfect inversion of the average Baki character physique, he has proven that the Dr. Eggman body type is possible in reality, no mere scootypuff can contain his gravitational power because he has become the Sun, the sol incarnate.

 

[semitooth]

more chatgpt generated titles

 

[Spasticus Autisticus]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=HSrjt7savt4more chatgpt generated titles

The giant menu is a red flag. I'd never eat sushi at a place like this. But it's already well established that Jack is a rube who gets suckered in by quantity.

He just had to leave in the shot of him fishing a shrimp tail out of his maw and drooling on his shirt.