💪 Tough Guys Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[Helvetia]

He has to say that because anything else would be to admit he’s getting worked up as shit over this stuff.

He’s still a retard, I just think he lost the card.

it got lost in one of his many, many, fat rolls. because he's fat.

 

[Sexual Chocolate]

If he's not sleeping through the night it wouldn't be crazy as an overweight older guy who drinks on top of it.

Here's my speculative lore, as a qualified Internet Doctor (Mario ). He's been on blood pressure medication since before he was 30, imma guess because he has been an alcoholic all his technically adult life. Young Rick (which should get a Netflix series) would have been particularly attracted to alcohol because of what a socially retarded dork he is plus his child's like, surface level understanding of masculinity. Because, despite being one of the most productive lolcows, Patrick has successfully tricked at least two women into having sex with him. Of course drinking was involved. He was banned from Hoolies - it's pretty much impossible for a sober customer to get banned from a bar.

This is a guy who brags about being an angry drunk, I believe him. Rick truly believes his tough guy persona, because he's hammered every night oinking into the internet. That's probably why his first wife left him. But all those booze calories are why he's inevitably gonna get fatter and fatter, until he needs a bra. Then he'll be a fat drunk man in a bra, compulsively typing out "this is why your life is already over", while his big sweaty man titties jiggle angrily in his bra. Child.

 

[Fake News Anchor]

Rick's heterosexuality is pretty tenuous and Niki looks like the embodiment of clinical depression.

They're into things, it's just that those things aren't each other.

 

[TerminalTryHard]

This raises a good question, when do you think Rick started drinking? I could see him starting very early due to how socially retarded he is, he is the exact type to try to use alcohol to make himself more sociable. That said I don't know if would be smart enough to get any alcohol underage.

His parents are Cleary shit so I could see him dipping into their supply without them noticing, hell mama Raven might've even been the type to let him drink cause "at least he's doing where I can watch him and stop him from doing something dangerous".

 

[Irene and 22 others]

This raises a good question, when do you think Rick started drinking? I could see him starting very early due to how socially retarded he is, he is the exact type to try to use alcohol to make himself more sociable. That said I don't know if would be smart enough to get any alcohol underage.

Given his abysmal grades and 1.2 GPA, probably during or even before high school. For all we know Technically Tomlinson started drinking in the womb. It would certainly explain a lot.

 

[Maude Snew]

A lot of times snoring would be one sign of that and his wife would notice, but I wonder if they even sleep in the same bed at this point

There hasn't been a bed made that could hold Fat Rick Thomas since the dawn of man, ever since the maker of fabled furniture such as the chair of Ralph left the world of mortals behind, so now Rick just sleeps on a hoard of pepperoni in his basement. Even if there was still such a mythical bed, Niki wouldn't be able to hear one pig softly childing and suffocating in his sleep over the sound of braps, the constant ooking, and sound of extra crispy chicken being consumed.

 

[Sexual Chocolate]

Mr President, another Mustang has struck the half hovel.
Wyświetl załącznik 6872871

One of the reasons why Pat is an S-tier cow is how interactions with him turn even normie liberals and wine aunts into hardcore Patposters.

 

[AnOminous]

Same moron that thinks people jumping into a lake when it's -6c outside are crazy while he has to wear a heavy cheap wool coat. Currently it's +9 in his city. Even up here it's not too bad, though it's going to be freezing out West.

What an absolute asshole, an utterly obese piece of shit, trashing people for having some fun in cold water. It's because he'd never engage in any physical activity other than gorging himself like a tick, battening himself with lard, and feasting on the flesh of children.

Jesus Christ guys are we bullying a card carrying retard?

Kind of, yeah. But I feel fine.

 

[Maude Snew]

What an absolute asshole, an utterly obese piece of shit, trashing people for having some fun in cold water. It's because he'd never engage in any physical activity other than gorging himself like a tick, battening himself with lard, and feasting on the flesh of children.

Kind of, yeah. But I feel fine.

Show some compassion, his phone was murdered by water.

 

[dj0449674]

Why is fatrick concerned ICE might search his property for brown people?
Wyświetl załącznik 6873202

I mean 2 and 3 are solid advice regardless.

 

[rusty shackleford 1]

Also does anyone else suspect his relatively new stock oink about Jen and "her own life" is some small dicked and fat way of trying to get the stalkerchilds to go after her? Would not be exactly out of character given his treatment of women

Oh my god I never considered that but now I have my own retarded fanfic hear me out: He’s seething because he’s reached out to the real Jen probably more than once and she’s probably either not responded (because the guy rambling in your inbox years after high school about cyber stalkers and white nationalists is usually bad news lol) or she’s been nonchalant and uninterested in talking about the Patrick show. He’s seething because he looks stupid. So he tells the pests to go and find her only to validate his schizo dms that she probably blew off.

 

[OffTopic]

After SpaceEdge called every Domino's in Milwaukee and eventually found the one who had blacklisted Rick's address, the Pests have been sending pizza orders in Rick's name to Hoolie's instead.











Someone claims to be sending pizzas in Rick's name to the MPD now, which I'm sure they'll appreciate.

 

[FinnSven]

Someone claims to be sending pizzas in Rick's name to the MPD now, which I'm sure they'll appreciate.

Wouldn’t that help his case?

Obviously it’s too late to submit it as evidence in discovery, but surely the responsible lawyers and officers involved with the case will hear about it and accept that someone is trying to fuck with the fat wanker?

At the very least it demonstrates that he isn’t a total paranoid delusional fool.

 

[OffTopic]

Wouldn’t that help his case?

How? His case is that the MPD violated his rights, not whether or not someone is fucking with him.

Obviously it’s too late to submit it as evidence in discovery, but surely the responsible lawyers and officers involved with the case will hear about it and accept that someone is trying to fuck with the fat wanker?

So? That's not what he's suing for.

At the very least it demonstrates that he isn’t a total paranoid delusional fool.

We're gonna have to agree to disagree on that.

 

[AprilRains]

How? His case is that the MPD violated his rights, not whether or not someone is fucking with him.

I think it's more complicated than that. I don't think his response to some random pizza orders is reasonable, but he may argue that this form of harassment turned up his temperature to the point where he presented the police with an apparent threat. It's no excuse, but he might offer it as an explanation.

 

[OffTopic]

I think it's more complicated than that. I don't think his response to some random pizza orders is reasonable, but he may argue that this form of harassment turned up his temperature to the point where he presented the police with an apparent threat. It's no excuse, but he might offer it as an explanation.

Pizza orders have nothing to do with the MPD response to swattings. The pizzas have nothing to do with his current lawsuit. I'm sure he'll want it brought up, but it does not have anything to do with whether or not the MPD violated his rights.

Rick will want to litigate issues that aren't on the table because he does it every time he's in court, and every time his lawyer has to shush him like a baby and spread his cheeks for the decision. Rick doesn't win in court. It's kind of his thing.

 

[Buck Broken Chimp]

Jim has just said that his next stream after inauguration will be about Rick.

 

[FinnSven]

Pizza orders have nothing to do with the MPD response to swattings. The pizzas have nothing to do with his current lawsuit. I'm sure he'll want it brought up, but it does not have anything to do with whether or not the MPD violated his rights.

Rick will want to litigate issues that aren't on the table because he does it every time he's in court, and every time his lawyer has to shush him like a baby and spread his cheeks for the decision. Rick doesn't win in court. It's kind of his thing.

By help his case it would indicate that someone is trying to make trouble for him via the internet.

I am sure even the MPD would accept that he isn’t so totally dense as to arrange to have cash on delivery pizzas sent to them using his real name.

It won’t have any bearing on the case and what is being decided by the court, but it could motivate the MPD to at least see if it can be settled without going through with the hearing.
Fatrick probably won’t have it, as he will want his day in court.

My point really is that fucking with hooligans using pizza orders in Patrick’s name is one thing, but fucking with the police in the same way is not going to make life worse for Patrick.

Ordering pizzas to a bar which serves food is going to annoy the staff and managers because real customers will see the pizza guy show up and some will assume it’s ok to order pizza and eat it there, so will start doing it themselves.
Also when no one claims the pizza the delivery guy is going to be hassling the staff about payment and shit.
It’s more likely that the owners will jump to conclusions that Patrick is the one trying to fuck with them.
They probably won’t phone the police or anything but word will get around and then Patrick will be obligated to correct the record.
So sure, some milk may emerge with Patrick showing up at hooligans to protest his innocence, but get into arguments with owners/managers.

The police don’t have the same concerns however, it’s more likely that some copper/station staff will just pay for the pizza and eat it.
Plus as I say, Patrick’s name will get mentioned and the police are more likely to understand this is the work of internet trolls fucking with him.

 

[Bill Evans 45]

Then he'll be a fat drunk man in a bra

Already there.

Wouldn’t that help his case?

It certainly won't hurt him and will get him some more sympathy and his beloved media exposure. Cue round 2 of 'why us?'
'See, we told you so! Now they're going after my bar and the MPD! Clinically obsessed stalkers! Abusing already marginalized gig workers! Maybe if the police had taken us seriously this wouldn't have happened! Reeeeeeee!'

but fucking with the police in the same way is not going to make life worse for Patrick.

This is why we here have a rule about not tipping the cow, law of unintended consequences etc.

The OnA lads are the wild west of PatWorld.

 

[Maude Snew]

Jim has just said that his next stream after inauguration will be about Rick.

Uh oh, those words trigger a cosmic hold my beer moment to take focus and prevent it so better watch out for the next bombshell to drop. What will happen? Will Nick Rekieta feed cocaine to an entire orphanage, will Boogie invade Iraq, will Acerthorn take some hostages?