🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Cringestorian X]

no way that he spends a vacation in a beach alone, could it be possible that he also bring the torta guy with him ?

 

[Hypervitaminosis]

Dreaming about the things you did in Cancun sounds like absolute nightmare material.

A non-exhaustive list of things you can't even dream of doing in Mexico because you aren't the Ralphamale:

• sit in an avocado colored bunker
• trip over open piss bottles in said bunker
• yell at your wife
• yell at your baby
• manhandle probably both
• lose both due to being Ethan Ralph
• get fed ice cream like an obese paraplegic child
• talk to phantom Tate on a Xanax induced trip
• get sued, alongside the occasional restraining order
• lose your truck
• watch 7h+ of news footage for other peoples entertainment
• be boring
• be sad
• be fat

Truly an inconceivable state of bliss and fulfilment, that mere KiwiCucks can not even dream of.
But at least he buys himself a nice dinner on occasion, and takes lonely strolls on the beach.
I really hope Da Gunt uses one of his photoshoots for the next cover.

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

He's actually trying to flex with his cringe boy band style fucking beach photos!

Do you reckon he was really nervous doing the kneeling poses in case he had to bolt after somebody trying to swipe the tripod?

 

[Elmo]

The faggot did a full photo shoot, lmao. Imagine being a tourist watching this retard posing like an effeminate, mentally ill homo in front of his smartphone. Dreaming about the things you did in Cancun sounds like absolute nightmare material.

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Lol, so Ralph is backpedaling on Metokur Fembot now? What the fuck is this? "I was linked a tweet by Gator" so you automatically believed it? What sort of retarded mental gymnas—you know what, forget it. I won't even bother. Ralph is a moron. Onwards and upwards with the ALL BY MYSELF inspirational photos, Ralph! You're totally not using your hands to hold your shirt in place to cover your meat apron.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Dreaming about the things you did in Cancun sounds like absolute nightmare material.

Desperately simping for an ugly pedophile cunt like Meigh, complete with lonely beach fauxto-shoots and pretending to have a dinner companion, is definitely something normal people can’t imagine doing in Cancun. Ya got us there, Piggy!

 

[Kerr Avon]

Somebody updated his IMDB with a bunch of vidya shit

Archived link

 

[AbyssStarer]

Is Ralph so boring people are resorting to wiki-vandalism? Wow, how funny and random. ROFLCOPTER

 

[Nod Flenders]

Somebody updated his IMDB with a bunch of vidya shit

Archived link


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I got a good laugh out of this. I never knew The Gunt appeared in all of these games.

 

[UCantCCPMe]

I got a good laugh out of this. I never knew The Gunt appeared in all of these games.

They forgot about his appearance in 1993's SNES classic Battletoads in Battlemaniacs.

 

[AncientPhosphur]

How can the swine kang live in a tropical region and visit the beach but still remain so pale?

 

[Wine em Dine em 69 em]

That’ll do, pig. F-.

 

[Obscura539]

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T | A

Now go for a swim, Ralph. I bet you won't get that shirt wet.

If you look at his left arm you can see how saggy the skin is. Man, he has the body of an deflated balloon. The horror these prostitutes must endure.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

The horror these prostitutes must endure.

Between his looks and his rotten tampon breath, he’s definitely not able to afford quality escorts even in impoverished Mexico. He really should just move to Thailand already.

 

[Rage Pig]

He can't stop sperging at Gaytor

Which makes this tweet posted a few minutes later even more funny

 

[Elmo]

He can't stop sperging at Gaytor
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Which makes this tweet posted a few minutes later even more funny
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If I had to guess, Gator, it was probably YOU who spent money on hookers!

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

Why is he even denying hookers, he has talked at length about hiring them, even showed them off on twitter on occasion. (in what we know now was an attempt to shame and make pantsu jealous for not fucking him).

Ralph, you do have to hire hookers for companionship, they're the only women in your life that haven't filed a restraining order or died.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

He can't stop sperging at Gaytor

Ralph has been acting womanly for years and it’s only getting more egregious. Just troon out already, fatso.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Ralph, you do have to hire hookers for companionship, they're the only women in your life that haven't filed a restraining order or died.

I could honestly see hookers filing restraining orders as an upcoming evolutionary step for the Gunt.

 

[Kerr Avon]

Ralph seems custom made for Morton Downey / Jerry / Donahue, which is ironic when you consider what his father , Juju, is famous for

 

[AltisticRight]

Somebody updated his IMDB with a bunch of vidya shit

Archived link


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>Bokoblin
Link in BoTW/ToTK is about 5'4'' so it checks out.