💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[stets]

 

[ZipDisk]

Surely they will hide him away

If Jack died in a hot van, would that be a Jack on the Go?

tubes of ground beef

I actually see less of these out shopping lately, the pink slime saga really fucked the market up, so now they use squares. Except walmart, because walmart doesn't give a fuck. Funny enough, meat tubes are called "chubs".

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Is this supposed to be a KETOOOOOOOOOOOOOO thing still? If Jack is still doing this "keto" shit, I'm going to be genuinely shocked. I honestly thought he'd at least try a different meme diet. It'd be one thing if he said "fuck it I'm just going to eat like shit till I die", but if he seriously keeps the same larp going as if nothing happened, I'm going to be at a loss for words.

Of course he's going KETOOOOO. Remember sugar is the only enemy in Jagoff's life... other than liberals.

All he's doing is increasing his chance of a 5th stroke. At this point he should just pack it in because he's done as a person. I don't see him living to see 2024. The Wendigo that's operating his body? That thing will be around for a while and be animating his corpse. The question is will anybody notice?

Funny enough, meat tubes are called "chubs".

So is Jagoff.

 

[Cask of Amontillado]

I just noticed this from a YouTuber I follow. He’s an Italian gentleman now living in Australia who has worked as a chef and a cooking instructor. I’ve learned some great recipes from him- his cooking videos are a pretty informative resource.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=XIpuC8fdPhI
He’s an insistent purist, so I knew it’d be a deservedly good takedown of an infamously horrid recipe. He goes after Jack pretty hard, hitting him on everything- the quality/pronunciation/proportion of his ingredients, his ring, the recipe and cooking method itself, his plating presentation, the pretentiousness of his cooking utensils, the way he eats, and his stroke-rambling. He calls out Jack’s Audible.com sponsor, saying that they should be ashamed.

He assertively declares Jack/CWJ “the worst cooking show [I’ve ever seen].” I can’t disagree.

BUT…he also pegs Jack as “such a nice guy” (12:56), and gives him the benefit of the doubt that he can “do better,” while reinforcing his perceived niceness (16:17). Now, he’s obviously misled, but I can’t fault him for not being caught up on Jack lore. I’m also excited because he said he’s “going to react to more of these videos to learn more about him.” Hoooo boy, this guy is headed down quite a rabbit hole. Hopefully it results in more Jack reaction content. Godspeed, Vincenzo.

First a duck named August, then Uncle Roger, then Chef Brian Tsao, and now Chef Vincenzo. Go figure.

 

[I am Jack's dead arm]

If Jack died in a hot van, would that be a Jack on the Go?

I actually see less of these out shopping lately, the pink slime saga really fucked the market up, so now they use squares. Except walmart, because walmart doesn't give a fuck. Funny enough, meat tubes are called "chubs".

He shops at Walmart/Sam's Club and I'm sure he has a bunch of them in his freezers anyway. He probably gets the huge 3 pound ones. 1) because he's a glutton and 2) they remind him of giant penises.

 

[AnOminous]

It should be illegal to cover mass shootings because naked people running on a baseball field never gets coverage.

Wyświetl załącznik 5024817
Wyświetl załącznik 5024820

ETA FOODJACKS REJOICE:
Wyświetl załącznik 5025171

It looks like he ate about 10 of his hospital meals and then just vomited them up into a pan.

As a side note, do you think Jack claims his vision is blurry is because he actually is blind or is it that he's stupid enough to not update his prescription for glasses

The vision problems are from his stroke. He has literal brain damage in his visual cortex, so his eyes, as weird and bugged-out as they are, aren't the problem. It's that his visual cortex has mostly been replaced with fat and cerebrospinal fluid. He literally no longer has the part of his brain that sees things.

First a duck named August, then Uncle Roger, then Chef Brian Tsao, and now Chef Vincenzo. Go figure.

I'm pretty sure every YouTube chef in existence is constantly bombarded with demands to do a Jack video.

 

[ZipDisk]

Vincenzo didn't ramp up the shock the way the youtube whores do. I honestly wouldn't mind if a cooking host took the time to teach how to unfuck Jack's recipes. (where possible)
I honestly hate how some of these idiots loudly gawk at Jack's videos, when they've seen it all before. They're not going in fresh, they're just pretending to be shocked.
Fuck that, and fuck them.

I feel like a lot of Jack's recipes could be perfectly normal dinners if you scaled back the gluttony. Granted, that's because they WERE perfectly normal dinner recipes before jack stole them and added a pound of shreddy cheese.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

First a duck named August, then Uncle Roger, then Chef Brian Tsao, and now Chef Vincenzo. Go figure.

If it directs more people towards seeing the culinary abominations that Scalfatty makes I'm all for it. The more people looking and laughing the better.

The vision problems are from his stroke. He has literal brain damage in his visual cortex, so his eyes, as weird and bugged-out as they are, aren't the problem. It's that his visual cortex has mostly been replaced with fat and cerebrospinal fluid. He literally no longer has the part of his brain that sees things.

Yeah he's legally blind now or at least in one eye. Which goes to show that he's really using speech to text when it comes to making his social media posts.

I feel like a lot of Jack's recipes could be perfectly normal dinners if you scaled back the gluttony. Granted, that's because they WERE perfectly normal dinner recipes before jack stole them and added a pound of shreddy cheese.

Most of what he's done could be a decent recipe if somebody with a little care or understanding followed them.

But Jagoff is all about speed and quantity. He wants maximum food in as short a time as possible. As such he cuts corners, makes stupid mistakes and blindly follows recipes without thinking what he's doing.

 

[breadandcircuses]

I wished I paid more attention to this thread so I could regale you with my own specialty red sauce.

Oh, what the heck, I'll post when I get home from work.

 

[Rubber Plant]

2) they remind him of giant penises.

Me too.

 

[desudesu]

Some posts from the fat man today. Back to strokeposting on boomerbook as usual. Also I can guarantee HOPE is still having the eternal harness on underneath that blanket:

 

[The Southwest Strangla]

Some posts from the fat man today. Back to strokeposting on boomerbook as usual. Also I can guarantee HOPE is still having the eternal harness on underneath that blanket:

Wyświetl załącznik 5029914
Wyświetl załącznik 5029917
Wyświetl załącznik 5029920

lol what happen to him hating " tiktok? now he loves it? god, he has BPD or something lol

 

[MS Paint Gigachad]

Wyświetl załącznik 5029920

"you are what you eat"

Remember that your next meal, Jagoff...

 

[DontEatThat_2.0]

I would bet money if a body builder wanted to sell him donuts he would not only be 1st in line, hed also giggle like a school girl being around him like the faggot he is. We all remember how he was around Keto Bear and his other guests.

Jack eats a lot of shit and by this logic Jack is shit.

 

[biggacracka]

lol what happen to him hating " tiktok? now he loves it? god, he has BPD or something lol

the stroke mushed his brain even more so he only remembers he has a strong opinion about tiktok but doesn't remember what it was so he goes with how he feels that day

 

[LaughJoke2.0]

Some posts from the fat man today. Back to strokeposting on boomerbook as usual. Also I can guarantee HOPE is still having the eternal harness on underneath that blanket:

Wyświetl załącznik 5029914
Wyświetl załącznik 5029917
Wyświetl załącznik 5029920

Aw Hope is such a good girl she looks at him with pure contempt.

 

[Reotardo da Vinci]

Just a thought, how down low do you have to be in order to literally boil chicken in molten cheese and put it on a sandwich? Is that just a Jack thing?

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

Do you count Jack On The Go as content? Because boy oh boy we are going to be getting a lot of those still I guarantee you.

Good

Personally, I prefer to see Jack act like an asshole, eat like an asshole, and treat people like an asshole than I do seeing him cook like an asshole.

 

[I am Jack's dead arm]

He posted a picture of Hope when got back from the nursing home. She's still in the harness.

Some posts from the fat man today. Back to strokeposting on boomerbook as usual. Also I can guarantee HOPE is still having the eternal harness on underneath that blanket:

Wyświetl załącznik 5029914
Wyświetl załącznik 5029917
Wyświetl załącznik 5029920

 

[AnOminous]

I honestly hate how some of these idiots loudly gawk at Jack's videos, when they've seen it all before. They're not going in fresh, they're just pretending to be shocked.

What I hate more is when they pretend to know more than they do and mock Jack for doing something that was actually right. That duckfucker is the most obvious example.

Jack eats a lot of shit and by this logic Jack is shit.

You are what you eat, and Jack eats SHIT. Giant loads of SHIT.

He shops at Walmart/Sam's Club and I'm sure he has a bunch of them in his freezers anyway. He probably gets the huge 3 pound ones. 1) because he's a glutton and 2) they remind him of giant penises.

These meat tubes are fucking vile. I always wondered who the hell even eats these things. Apparently Jackhole.