The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch / @TenaciousRanch / Steampunk Penny / Penellope Logue / Phillip Matthew Logue - Don't cry because it ended, laugh because it's still getting worse.

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Who are the top three strongest characters in the Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe (KGIU) canon?

  • Gash Coyote

    Głosy: 103 4,5%
  • Rioley

    Głosy: 279 12,1%
  • Penis

    Głosy: 417 18,1%
  • Loathsome Dung Eater Jen

    Głosy: 300 13,0%
  • Boner

    Głosy: 300 13,0%
  • Kevin Gibes

    Głosy: 685 29,7%
  • The Elusive Earl

    Głosy: 717 31,1%
  • Landon Hiscock

    Głosy: 267 11,6%
  • The Korps LARP Brigade

    Głosy: 206 8,9%
  • Kiwifarms Militia

    Głosy: 1 152 49,9%
  • Kindness

    Głosy: 669 29,0%
  • Trans Cucumber The Child Abandoner

    Głosy: 314 13,6%

  • Łączna liczba głosujących
    2 309
I don’t think Penny and his boyfriends killed the remaining alpaca. I could definitely be wrong, but here’s my thinking:

At their peak the tranch had something like 200 alpaca. Assume for a moment that Bonnie’s claim that he helped bury a max of 60 alpacas is correct, and assume that as many as another 40 died and went to the wolf sanctuary over time. You’re still left with 100 alpacas, and Penny only took 10 with him to his parents. So you’ve got at least 90 missing alpacas. I think it’s likely much higher, but let’s say 90.

Adult alpaca are 120-200 pounds. That’s a lot of animal to maneuver, particularly if dead weight. Killing, moving and burying that many animals would be a really major undertaking these dudes are too lazy to do. I do believe they would just walk away and abandon them, but I think even Penny would sense the danger of bad PR at that point.

It makes the most sense to me that Penny took a handful of animals and bailed to his family’s place, and left the remaining alpaca, dogs, and chickens and ducks under the dubious care of another troon (Skye? Does he still live there?) who’s supposed to take care of them until Bonnie returns.

I don’t know what Bonnie thinks he can do with them. These animals have very little value except as pets, and what are the odds dozens of locals want a couple alpaca each? You’re likely looking at thousands of dollars in livestock trailer rentals and fuel to relocate these animals to new homes out of the immediate area, assuming you can even find homes for them. So I’m guessing that the tranchers are all assuming that someone else will step in and take care of the rehoming, like some alpaca rescue will handle it and pay for it. It’s always someone else’s problem, if you’re a troon.

One thing that makes me actually MATI about troons and leftist utopian extremists in general is how little respect they have for labor and competence. They do all of this complaining about “capitalism”, the system that enables their lifestyles, and seek mostly to live by grift, but they always seem to think that everything is going to be really easy for them whenever they do take action. Remember early in the saga when they got fawning press and one of them would always be like “we’re going to be totally self sufficient and grow all our own food”. Retard, you live in a place with a 64 day growing season that gets 14 inches of rain a year, you ain’t growing shit. An extremely skilled and experienced grower with the capital to set up a passive solar greenhouse could basically provide some fresh vegetables year round. With a 35 acre property in a cold, arid place like that, maybe they could keep a very small flock of sheep if they managed their rotations very carefully.

It has always made me mati how they pretended to be self sufficient when they imported thousands of pounds of hay. They’re basically an alpaca feedlot.

I’m irrationally annoyed that MSM did all these puff pieces on the tranch and never asked “but how will you make money though” and course there will never be any follow ups.

Finally, Penny if you’re reading this, for the love of God, buy or make a hay feeder!!! You have to be feeding the better part of a square bale per day, the feeder will quickly pay for itself. And if you’re feeding grain or pellets, stop feeding it in that tote lid, get yourself to tractor supply and buy a couple of round rubber livestock feeders, they’re cheap (under 20 bucks). Buy several so you can feed the goats and the alpaca in separate areas of the pen.
 
This isn't in the thread OP so I'm guessing many new onlookers haven't seen it yet. Samantha Bee's thankfully canceled Daily Show ripoff gave the Tranch a whole propaganda piece.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=wkAPSij4AhUWhen it all goes up in flames MSM will go silent of course.

Edit: It makes me laugh so much at the 1:35 mark when one of the troons says this is the perfect place to start your transition. The delusion was so damn sky high with these bastards. They had no damn idea how hard it is to be a farmer and care for livestock.
God, this almost seems like some kind of parody. I legit can not distinguish between troon propaganda and troon parody anymore.
 
Sadly I can't see them being responsible enough nor wealthy enough to shoot them. I'm not even sure wolves could get to them given the state of the land. Odds are they got left where they dropped .
The wolves they were referring to, I think was the wolf rescue or whatever nearby. They've given them dead animals before.
 
An Amhole™ Production
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Forgive the indulgence but I was wondering about the Fate of the Alpaca and did a little Twitter search.

Wyświetl załącznik 4479876
Wow, a satisfied customer! Let’s take a look and see what they’re about.

Wyświetl załącznik 4479869
Wyświetl załącznik 4479867

Wyświetl załącznik 4479893
It’s a standard Kevin.

Brace yourselves, this is horrifying but it’s not what you think.

Ooh, a bunch of new profile pics for me, thanks!
 
God, this almost seems like some kind of parody. I legit can not distinguish between troon propaganda and troon parody anymore.
At the end one of them jokes that you shouldn't try to ride an Alpaca. Makes me wonder if one tried and crushed the poor animal.

He tells it like a joke but I wouldn't put it past them.
 
Don’t worry kiwis me and earl raided the Tranch a few days ago and brought them to a safe house. They are quite chill and just passing the time til we get them to a true safe pasture in the Russian Republic. Here is a pic showing them passing the time, please contribute to our go fund me

Unknown.jpeg
 
Forgive the indulgence but I was wondering about the Fate of the Alpaca and did a little Twitter search.

Wyświetl załącznik 4479876
Wow, a satisfied customer! Let’s take a look and see what they’re about.

Wyświetl załącznik 4479869
Wyświetl załącznik 4479867

Wyświetl załącznik 4479893
It’s a standard Kevin.

Brace yourselves, this is horrifying but it’s not what you think.

If he isn't a real woman than why are they eating like they are pregnant? Checkmate chuds.
 
I don't really have it in me to feel bad. They don't have to let this aging troon into their house, it's a choice. A bad choice.

Just say NO to troon relatives and save enough to put their real name on their gravestone.
There's a certain age when people lose their critical faculties and believe anything an authority figure tells them, maybe it's a regression to childhood or something. I suspect the grandparents have no idea what they're in for, and their impression of what troons are like mainly comes from the mainstream media.
 
There's a certain age when people lose their critical faculties and believe anything an authority figure tells them, maybe it's a regression to childhood or something. I suspect the grandparents have no idea what they're in for, and their impression of what troons are like mainly comes from the mainstream media.
I wouldn't blame them if they both had alzheimers, as far as we know it's bad enough that the old lady still thinks (and all she remembers) she has a functioning son. But I don't remember reading anything about the grandfather being mentally deficient. Most people I've known that start acting like what you describe are in their mid to late 80s and can't really remember anything anyways. The sort of people who fall for scam calls and mail because they fall for anything at all because they seemingly forget that people can lie.

I haven't seen anything that says the elderly father falls into that category yet, so I was mostly just assuming he was in the sad, sad category of thinking he still had a son and trying lend him a helping hand. Still a massive mistake, but not an unknowing one. Most sane people bow out when it comes to hosting their grown kid AND his mutilated catamites.
 
It's for goats to play on. Goats like jumping on things, especially as kids, and trampolines are bouncy.
Thanks for sharing this very cute fun fact.

Palate cleanser I found on YouTube for anyone else who could use one in these extremely grim times:
 
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