The worst part about Kai wanting to move out isn't because she wants a stable life or wants real independence to feel good about herself and adulthood: she wants to live on her own because she doesn't like her parents telling her what to do and suddenly not spoiling her. She and Maltt have to be corralled and separated and directed by the parents like a couple of teenagers because the whole family realized having a baby does not make the problems in your life perfect - what a shock. Kai and Maltt themselves don't even bother seeing this and are making their families' hair turn grey. They don't have an ounce of responsibility in their bones and Kai doesn't like knowing people want her to stop being delusional and just put some effort into raising and noticing her own daughter.
If Kai really wanted to turn her life around, knock off her beauty bullshit, give Matt and ultimatum or at least not treat his disorders like the equivalent of him leaving the toilet seat up, and focused on Gracie, I would be applauding her. But then Kai wouldn't be a topic on this forum if she had realized things like this before and tried making a better and respectable life for herself.
Her hugbox with her parents taking care of everything seems to be quickly crumbling, and while I'm glad she seems to finally be realizing it, MW is even more in the wrong. She let Kai become this way and never once taught her "you are at the age where you need to do this for yourself." Mama Wilcher also seems appallingly toxic with what she told Kai, but then again I never trust much of what Kai says so her mom could have been just blowing up out of pure tension and Kai wanted to exaggerate it - but we've also heard how MW acts with the phone calls and her quirks about how to raise Gracie, so I could easily believe she really is saying those awful things to Kai, with Kai using it for pity points instead of thinking "me and my daughter don't need this."