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Both give me vibes that if I survive the encounter they will stalk me for 6 years after, minimum. Also, "I won't get past this alone so it's up...

Top looks like a good Jewish husband, maybe a 'quirky' accountant who flies model airplanes in his spare time and still calls his grandma Bubbie...

That motherfucker had to complete the Tom Green cosplay by removing a nut, didn't he?

Because he was able to grow a thick beard, it disguised the fact he looks like a malformed alpaca. If the beard was a bit more groomed/shaped...

Martin Starr? Also it would be a shame if someone posted under his begging tweet asking if any of that money was going to the kids he abandoned.

Neither. But at least he looked better several years ago. The beard actually helps frame his face better and hide his freakishly long neck. If he...

Neither for zero dollars. Top has a neckbeard and a "fundementalist" look about him, as well as an offputting crazy vibe. Bottom is the same man...

This guy doesn't even pretend like he's trying to make online friends or offer any type of content—even if it's just dumb hot takes on shit like...

This creature triggers my fight or flight response big time, he is extremely unsettling.