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How the heck is he supposed to remember an event that didn't happen in a different way? Secondly, he's effectively saying that the event didn't...

I would have preferred different wording, but witnesses are supposed to write their own affidavits, not have them obviously written by counsel...

Explain how "If Monica was distressed after leaving Victor Mignogna's room, I am certain that I would remember it." is functionally different...

Monica claimed he noticed and asked her about it. Stan says he did not notice, as had he noticed he would have behaved differently. Therefore her...