🐷 Ethan Oliver Ralph / TheRalphRetort / Rad Roberts / Jcaesar187 / Rage Pig / "Killstream" / "Tequila Sunrise" - 5'1'' fat alcoholic, owner of a gunt, convicted felon, alleged rapist and revenge pornographer. Exiled in Mexico carlesss on a diet of slop. Has triple titties. Wanted to fuck Keffals' moobs.

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Wazzupnerds powiedział(a):
As one of the first post from the downage, I just want to call Ethan fat.
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Saying he's fat is almost a compliment, he's crossed the line to morbidly obese:
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He can't even do two burpees in a row, and he doesn't even do it right:
 
Last night I had a nightmare that I was stuck in a hotel room with Gunt and Warski, and that I was naked in the single twin bed spooning naked Ralph while begging Warski to get me some form of clothing or a bath towel or anything so I wouldn't have my genitals smashed flat directly against Ralph's buttcrack and backgunt. Warski just sat by the bed ignoring my pleas, doing coke and trying to get me into a conversation about Ninjaghinis.
 
RalphsFailingKidneys powiedział(a):
Anyway, every parent I've met who had the same attitude as Ralph of "It's gonna be a boy", ends up with a girl. Always.
Either way, whatever he gets, it will grow up to hate him and to make his life miserable like he's done to others.
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Lmao the sped probably thinks his alcohol-pickled tard jizz is so alpha that it guarantees him a male.
 
RalphsFailingKidneys powiedział(a):
Saying he's fat is almost a compliment, he's crossed the line to morbidly obese:
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He can't even do two burpees in a row, and he doesn't even do it right:
fat_drunk_gunt.webm
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Holy shit just a comparison from the video (which is Knoxville or Miami idk?) and the picture from the Jacob Wohl interview shows how much weight he's put on in just a year or two.

He's got a BMI anywhere between 47 and 60 - either way he's so severely obese it's dangerous.
 
Berb powiedział(a):
Holy shit just a comparison from the video (which is Knoxville or Miami idk?) and the picture from the Jacob Wohl interview shows how much weight he's put on in just a year or two.

He's got a BMI anywhere between 47 and 60 - either way he's so severely obese it's dangerous.
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So does this mean we could be lucky enough for a heart attack stream?
 
The thing about Ralph's weight is that if he just stopped drinking he's lose a ton of it. He's not overeating as much as his size might make it appear. If he was eating a ton of trashburgers every day and whatever else AS WELL AS his drinking, he'd already be dead or Boogie levels of obese.

I bet if he stopped drinking he'd lose like 20 pounds in just a couple weeks.
 
Berb powiedział(a):
Holy shit just a comparison from the video (which is Knoxville or Miami idk?) and the picture from the Jacob Wohl interview shows how much weight he's put on in just a year or two.

He's got a BMI anywhere between 47 and 60 - either way he's so severely obese it's dangerous.
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They go from most recent to oldest (although the white t-shirt pic and video are from the same trip to DC i believe), all of them after Knoxville.
He's definitely in a downward spiral, if you look at Knoxville pictures he had the gigantic gunt but he didn't look like a clump of dough with stumpy arms/legs and a giant egg for a head, and that was less than two years ago, what the hell is he going to look like when the baby is born? If he even makes it that long.
 
The white t-shirt pic was from the trip to Miami, I believe. That's what he was wearing when he ate the trash burger.
 
MeltyTW powiedział(a):
lol a paypiggie just blew out ralphs ego by pointing out only 1 kid is still below replacement and that 2 only evens out the loss of the parents. credit where due to the gunt guard i hadnt considered that, his own fucking paypiggy slaves are unintentionally btfoing him and giving us new material!
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dont encourage him to have more kids damn it.
 
Jiz Oleman powiedział(a):
Remember when Ammon Bundy's group of exceptional representatives of the Hoowyte race invaded and occupied that bird reserve in Bumfuck, Oregon a few years ago? I remember being so shitter-shattered at how unfunny it was when they asked for people to send supplies like food, toiletries, etc., and instead were bombarded with delivery after delivery of big huge dildos. The phone videos of them hurling the dildos down on the mess hall table, and screaming at people to stop it, made me feel horrible for them.

I would feel even worse if this happened to Ethan. The man's got a kid on the way, and I would imagine his on-air performance would be impacted negatively by mid-day rubber phallus deliveries interrupting his sleep. And really, there's no place for any dildos in the Ralph household.

I know I've only known you guys for like a few weeks but I highly implore you folks not to disappoint me with this kind of unfunny display, at risk of getting out of pocket. Thank you for considering my feelings in this matter, Kiwi Farms.

EDIT: And please, PLEASE, don't send this model.
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Poop Senders - The ULTIMATE Gag Gift - SWEET Revenge at its FINEST

Anonymously send a package of poop to your friends or enemies. The ultimate gag gift. Sweet revenge at its finest.
www.poopsenders.com
 
Jiz Oleman powiedział(a):
Remember when Ammon Bundy's group of exceptional representatives of the Hoowyte race invaded and occupied that bird reserve in Bumfuck, Oregon a few years ago? I remember being so shitter-shattered at how unfunny it was when they asked for people to send supplies like food, toiletries, etc., and instead were bombarded with delivery after delivery of big huge dildos. The phone videos of them hurling the dildos down on the mess hall table, and screaming at people to stop it, made me feel horrible for them.

I would feel even worse if this happened to Ethan. The man's got a kid on the way, and I would imagine his on-air performance would be impacted negatively by mid-day rubber phallus deliveries interrupting his sleep. And really, there's no place for any dildos in the Ralph household.

I know I've only known you guys for like a few weeks but I highly implore you folks not to disappoint me with this kind of unfunny display, at risk of getting out of pocket. Thank you for considering my feelings in this matter, Kiwi Farms.
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Unironically don't do it though cuz Ralph could potentially dox you if he were to investigate where the packages came from / who paid for them. Doing shit like that is funny until 30 people do it and the police decide to look into it and the shipping companies hand over your info to them.
 
Mundane Ralph powiedział(a):

Poop Senders - The ULTIMATE Gag Gift - SWEET Revenge at its FINEST

Anonymously send a package of poop to your friends or enemies. The ultimate gag gift. Sweet revenge at its finest.
www.poopsenders.com
Kliknij, aby rozwinąć...
disavow
FakeNewsAnchor powiedział(a):
Unironically don't do it though cuz Ralph could potentially dox you if he were to investigate where the packages came from / who paid for them. Doing shit like that is funny until 30 people do it and the police decide to look into it and the shipping companies hand over your info to them.
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No one registered here would spend the money.
 
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