MY NEW WEIGHT LOSS PLAN - aww shit here we go again, 08/07/2020

[Moronic Spletonic]

If amber actually sticks to this and has succes I will eat thefitgingers meals for a week.

 

[rain and petals eavesdrop]

OH GOD! Here we go again. This is hilarious. It is funny how whenever she finds something new it is the best thing ever and what is right for her but then within two days it is not what works for her. She will never succeed at weight loss. She should just give it up and just eat whatever she wants. This is getting so old.

 

[a dinosaur]

Operation Optavia 2.0.

Yeah, pretty much.

 

[pr3nt177]

She hits 572.4lbs and has a lightbulb moment...not at 224lbs, not at 336lbs, not even 420lbs but at 572.4lbs. That's how "worried" she was about her weight, constantly ate for 4 and reached 40.885714 stone and suddenly "oh dear, I'm overweight".

Unbelievable.

 

[497]

this almost sounded like a sponsored video. I guess she would have to disclose that though? It's the one thing I'd have to give her credit for is she never took up sponsorships... I hate videos that just turn into a commercial.

 

[HickoryDickory]

The TV ads they have for Noom don't come off well, imo. The people they use are still chubby/fat without addressing how they were before Noom.

I guess that's another reason for Amber to try it if it lets her be fat, just less fat.

 

[DefCon Dumb]

Oh boy... here we go again. She starts by whining about how viewers holding her accountable for not succeeding over the past 6+ years is "not fair". Fair, schmair - when you say you're going to do something, (repeatedly), & not only fail but make things far worse, expect a lot of shit to be flung your way. 4,000 calorie binges put weight on her? No shit.

Yes, she needs structure. Imo, she needs 24/7 supervision by a qualified adult until she learns some adult behaviours. Plenty of programs she's talked about, (not going to dignify her yammering with the word 'tried'), offer plenty of structure. She lacks the ability to stick with anything. Point. Blank. Period.

I'm certainly not prepared to 'downgrade' this program - all I know about it is what I've seen on their spam level ads on TV & online. However, I don't believe they're really set up to do more than "normal" weight loss; say... 10-50 lbs. But I don't know that for a fact.

Of course she loves the idea of her own coach & a support group - if it's offering, (seemingly), plenty of personal attention aimed at HER - she's all for that.

She's already hedging; that comes across clearly when she talks about how often she should be eating the various colors of food - she won't come out & say red foods shouldn't be eaten save for rarely & sparingly - she softens the language.

Since when has she ever made real progress, especially when weighing in daily?

I thought counting calories was triggering for her? Yet she's happy to report they've giving her a 2,400 calorie a day limit. A higher limit "never felt right" or some such bullshit.

She waxes lyrical about the advice the site offers. She's always had access to plenty of reasonable, sound eating advice. She simply ignores it.

If you calculate her TDEE & generously allow her a 'light activity' level, if she sticks to 2,400 calories a day, she's on track to, (allowing for downwards adjustment in calories & upwards in activity), lose 85 lbs. in 8 months. But she'll have to really want it & work bloody hard.... yes, that's the sound of crickets.

She's definitely trying to rope in new viewers & subs. The excitement of a shiny new diet toy is there & she can barely clamp down on her usual overly-effusive enthusiasm for something new.

By this time next week, she'll have found a half dozen reasons why "this isn't gonna work for me, Boo-Boo."

 

[DelicateMageflower]

But did she do hours and hours and hours and HOURS of research, like she did for the smashing success that was Optavia?

 

[behavioral swamp thang]

After the hysto, she was getting her color back. I imagine a few days of crumbs did her wonders. Her cells taking relief from their Sisyphusian task of converting olive soup into fat and creating new blood vessels to reach far flung folds. She's going grey again and looking worse by the day now that the peanut butter cup train is back on duty.

 

[Taco Bell Chihuahua]

So she said she would binge 4K calories at night, let’s do some calorie comparisons just for funsies since she doesn’t say what she would eat. (And I have a hard time imagining what 4K calories looks like)

4k calories could be:
7 BigMac hamburgers from McDonalds. (563 cal. each)
7 Crunchwrap Supremes from Taco Bell. (530 cal. each)
4 Pints of Ben and Jerry’s (1,000 cal. each)
7 King Sized Snicker Bars (540 cal. each)
1 Entire Jar of Peanut Butter and some change (avg. 3,000 cal per jar, brand dependent)
33 Large Bananas (121 cal. each)

What she is actually eating during binging we may never know. But what I have concluded is that’s a lot of food.

 

[repentance]

Noom advertises a lot here.

I suspect that it's only really different for people who've never considered the idea that there's an emotional component to their eating habits.

None of the commercial weight loss plans are really designed for deathfats.

 

[ADHD]

this almost sounded like a sponsored video. I guess she would have to disclose that though? It's the one thing I'd have to give her credit for is she never took up sponsorships... I hate videos that just turn into a commercial.

She made a point of saying that this was not a sponsored video.

 

[8008135]

So, what's gonna be the excuse this time?

1) It let didn't let me eat enough calories
2) It let me eat too many calories
3) I didn't like how it made me feel (i.e., hungry)
4) It was too difficult to stick to because my life is soooooooo busy, guise
5) I binged once, so fuck it, forget it

Place your bets!

 

[Darth_Texan]

No need to remember when, ‘cuz everything old is new again

 

[marjoram]

Smells an awful lot like Optavia around here. This new one's different though 'cause it gives her busy work to do so she feels she's accomplishing something. And Big Al's too stupid to understand the psychology behind anything, otherwise she would have listened to the hundreds of people in her comments telling her to get some therapy.
Another fail for the Queen of Faileration.

 

[Orion Balls]

Meet the new weight loss plan; same as the old weight loss plan: do nothing.

So, what's gonna be the excuse this time?

1) It let didn't let me eat enough calories
2) It let me eat too many calories
3) I didn't like how it made me feel (i.e., hungry)
4) It was too difficult to stick to because my life is soooooooo busy, guise
5) I binged once, so fuck it, forget it

Place your bets!

I've got a gentleman on 5.
E- Shit, she's on noom? Can I change my bet to 3? She's not going to enjoy this entire psychic change to lose weight, thing. Same gentleman, now on 3.

 

[pr3nt177]

So, what's gonna be the excuse this time?

1) It let didn't let me eat enough calories
2) It let me eat too many calories
3) I didn't like how it made me feel (i.e., hungry)
4) It was too difficult to stick to because my life is soooooooo busy, guise
5) I binged once, so fuck it, forget it

Place your bets!

6. I'm just plain greedy,
7. Post-op PTSD.
8. Can't count calories as I can't count / I'm colour-blind.
9. It's raining.
10. I'm borderline anorexic as it is.

 

[Fupacabra]

If I was the owner of the company that makes this app, I would be terrified that this toxic cunt is damaging my app's reputation just by talking about it. Everything she touches with her beetus paws turns to shit.

 

[Fapcop]

I don’t think the word “journey” means what Amberlynn thinks it means.

Pro tip: If you’ve spent the better part of your life on a “weight loss journey”, then it stops being a journey and is basically your daily life.

Also: I can’t help but be impressed with how they built a whole fucking industry on losing weight, and basically repackaging and selling all this shit that people already know!

They’re all basically shilling the same shit:

1: Dont gorge yourself, eat less than X amount of calories.

2: Eat this rarely, eat this sometimes, eat this a lot.

Anything else? Nope, that’s pretty much it. And folks still pay money for what is basically gradeschool-tier concepts.

 

[Pope Negro Joe the XIIIth]

Imagine being excited that you're still lying to people about weighing almost 500 pounds because you certainly weigh more.