Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

You know....ALLLLLLLLLL Disney had to do, was make a new version of the original trilogy where the torch gets passed to a new set of heroes, and they'd be richer than God's Banker right now. They could been lazy ; they could have copied all of the OT beat for beat, thrown in some fanservice, tossed in some great villains performed by some famous character actors, - easy peasy stuff. There was no way they were going to please ALL of the obsessive fans, but still, all they had to do make a simple hero's journey/save the world fantasy, leave out the George Lucas bad dialogue/political shit, make it all LOOK like the Original Trilogy and Boom! Money... We'd all be sitting here now talking about how the new movies weren't quite as good as the OT, but we'd admire how workmanlike they were, how well they managed to please most of the audience, and we might even be looking forward to the next installment.

I am astonished that a company so obsessed with making money, a company notorious for its rapaciousness, and its jealous hoarding of its intellectual property - that such a company would be willing to trade away the printing-money potential of one of the most profitable franchises of all time, for the chance to virtue signal. I know we've talked about this over and over again - Disney wants to buy Goodwill and thinks the way to do that in The Current Year is to push Girl-Power and Man-hating ; a bunch of crazy, empty suits got control over everything and decided to shit up the franchise by passing off their 8th grade fanfiction as an actual movie trilogy, etc, etc...

But really, you almost have to stand back and marvel over how Social Justice hollows out and destroys everything it touches. How it warps reality and makes otherwise competent people see the world in an upside down way. How a company could think ass-pats from Dangerhairs and Woke Twitter Influencers could in any way make up for the billions of dollars of losses in movie and toy sales. We've entered a strange world where the adults no longer know what they're doing. Where even natural instincts like greed can't keep the machine of industry running.

Get woke, go broke. Why is that lesson such a hard one to learn?
 
You know....ALLLLLLLLLL Disney had to do, was make a new version of the original trilogy where the torch gets passed to a new set of heroes, and they'd be richer than God's Banker right now. They could been lazy ; they could have copied all of the OT beat for beat, thrown in some fanservice, tossed in some great villains performed by some famous character actors, - easy peasy stuff. There was no way they were going to please ALL of the obsessive fans, but still, all they had to do make a simple hero's journey/save the world fantasy, leave out the George Lucas bad dialogue/political shit, make it all LOOK like the Original Trilogy and Boom! Money... We'd all be sitting here now talking about how the new movies weren't quite as good as the OT, but we'd admire how workmanlike they were, how well they managed to please most of the audience, and we might even be looking forward to the next installment.
That's basically TFA though. Even TLJ is basically just a retelling of ESB at its core with Rian Johnson's galaxy-brained ideas shitting it up even further. I've no doubt Kathleen Kennedy views Nu-Wars as more of a vehicle for her own ego secondary to maximizing profit but all the woke bullshit sprinkled on top isn't what ruins the sequels, it just compounds the existing shittiness.
 
got no 'AKTUALLY's to give on this one. Only instance I can recall of an apprentice training with a dozen combat remote droids around him was an illustration of young Anakin in an old jedi guide from around 2008ish.
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But yeah, maybe it'd look better if the pictures had more space, but I guess we'll never know how it would've looked like on screen.
I've thought more about those two concept pics. Several training droids would be fine, it's just 1: the overblown number that gets me and 2: I'm basing it off of the two garbage films we got and not George's concept. I wouldn't be as jaded if girl was trained for 1-2 movies and this was close to mastery, but I'm basing it on current girl having everything handed to her with no effort.

I'd still mod it a little, but I think the samurai-ish concept could work. I think what's shown with the coloring and closeup angle doesn't work, yet If it was taken from 10ft back / different angle i think it could blend into a scene pretty well.

Blame Jake Lunt Davies for that loss.
Fuck that dude!
 
I have to admit, I did like TFA. Initially. I knew they had to rip off the OT and that there was no way they were going to do something daring. Then they burned everything to the ground with TLJ, then doubled down, then tripled down, then quadrupled down. And then the theme park came out and it was obvious that their plan from the beginning was to burn the OT into the ground. Now people actually want George Lucas back. That's how bad its gotten.
I enjoyed TFA, too. I felt it was a letdown, since it copied ANH way too blatantly, but it wasn't unservicable and it was fun. Most weakspots of TFA (such as invalidating the entire plot of the old movies in many way) weren't that apparent to me until TLJ created even more such issues. Part of the problem was also that I wanted to see what they have in store for the new trilogy and how the things set up in TFA would pan out. Turns out: They don't.
Ruin just took every little hook and threw it in the garbage, replacing them with nothing.

If TLJ had been a decent movie that gives us a satisfying story, Luke not being the worst human being ever, and did its own thing, I guess I would have even forgiven them for how TFA invalidated the end of the old movies. If TLJ had been a good movie that went it's own way. If.

Its a myth that JJ didn't know where he was going. He absolutely did. The thing was Johnson ignored and actively destroyed every hook JJ put up while at the same time using TLJ to basically obliterate the OT.
There's something I've read in this thread a couple of times, namely that JJ set up mystery boxes that he never had any clue on what to do with them or how to resolve them.
The thing is, even if this is true, they would have acted as a convenient hook to do something with them, but Ruin just unceremoniously got rid of them. It's kind of what I don't get about nuFans: Ruin actively punished people for caring about the setups made in TFA.

Even if there was no plan or intention for these mystery boxes, they were still there and could be taken advantage of. And frankly, I doubt that JJ had no clue what to do about them. I just think that they would have been a bit too obvious, such as Rey being a lost Skywalker/Solo, Snoke being Plagueis and so on.

Now in full on panic mode, they don't know what to do. Not having RJ continue is basically admitting he completely fucked up, everyone knows he fucked up. Disney releases rumors of an RJ trilogy to save his pride, but that's never going to fucking happen. JJ was basically done with Star Wars until they paind him so much,
What I would have loved to see is Johnson returning for IX, just to see where he would go from there. As Jay Baumann said, TLJ feels like the end of a trilogy, there isn't really anything left to do or a place to go with this movie.

Being forced to deal with the mess he created would have given me much pleasure.

...and now he has signed a $500 million deal with Warner. Who knows what he's going to reboot. Babylon 5?
 
There's that interview with a TFA writer who states Luke was cut because he is the more interesting character and as soon as he is introduced nobody gives a shit about bland boring Rey. I'd expect the same thing happening here, Talon would instantly be the more liked, interesting character and overshadow the approved Disney corporate waifubait princess.

Any competent production team could easily solve that problem by:
1) Not making Luke a big suspenseful mystery - maybe making him the Master of the new Jedi Academy (which everyone wanted anyway) is the solution, as it precludes the surprise factor and transfers a lot of energy to his apprentice/student (the protagonist).

2) Writing the protagonist to be a relatable and compelling character, at least on par with Luke so people will connect with and have a reason to pursue their story.

3) Hiring somebody that can act, so they don't look like a clown every time Mark Hamill manages to wring good performances out of a bad script while they gawp like a Downs baby.
 
Disney 100% wants their 'vision' to replace the OT. Which is never going to happen. You know that EA Star Wars game that had no human dismemberment from a fucking laser sword? Yeah, that came from them. They want their bland as fuck, garbage characters to replace everything.
 
And finally, it looks like IX is even more messier and rushed than I realized.
Well fuck a duck, I called it. They’re so fucking clueless that they’re even rushing it.

I’m also surprised they hadn’t announced reshoots yet for TROS, given its rushed production and the way they literally edit the film on set.
 
Ostatnio edytowane przez moderatora:
Well fuck a duck, I called it. They’re so fucking clueless that they’re even rushing it.
One of the reasons I dislike the "big new thing a year" approach when it comes to a film or a game. Sure, when you put adversity and limitations on the director, crew, and actors, you tend to getbetter work from a team if they have a good relationship and talent since those restrictions forcibly squeeze out creativity and can restrain a more wild person in the chair. But time crunches tend to be an exception to this, since it forces uglier compromises, can sometimes cut very good moments from the film that's needed, and it forces rushing, which can affect the final product.

It also leads to viewer/consumer fatigue usually, and you never want that shit to happen.
Why does the film HAVE to be out by December?

Can’t they push it back to May or some shit?
Because they're retards who want to desperately keep their blockbusters in Winter, which you can thanks James Cameron to a degree for and the fact that kids and a lot of people are off work or school for the hols. Honestly, I'd go for "Fuck you" January instead, since that month has garbo traditionally and so if you have a good product it'll usually smash. It'd give a bit more time to ensure the film's not shit too.
 
One of the reasons I dislike the "big new thing a year" approach when it comes to a film or a game. Sure, when you put adversity and limitations on the director, crew, and actors, you tend to getbetter work from a team if they have a good relationship and talent since those restrictions forcibly squeeze out creativity and can restrain a more wild person in the chair. But time crunches tend to be an exception to this, since it forces uglier compromises, can sometimes cut very good moments from the film that's needed, and it forces rushing, which can affect the final product.

It also leads to viewer/consumer fatigue usually, and you never want that shit to happen.

Because they're exceptional individuals who want to desperately keep their blockbusters in Winter, which you can thanks James Cameron to a degree for and the fact that kids and a lot of people are off work or school for the hols. Honestly, I'd go for "Fuck you" January instead, since that month has garbo traditionally and so if you have a good product it'll usually smash. It'd give a bit more time to ensure the film's not shit too.
Nah, see if it's released in January, people will have forgotten it for newer, shinier things by the time Oscar nominations are coming out. Cram it into December and you can still be talked about. See that movie about Cheney that was squeezed in on what, the 28th? Just so it could be in 2018 noms. I mean I doubt they're aiming for best actor/actress or screenwriter, but some nominations for effects or something so Disney can wave around an Oscar nominated/winner Star Wars.

Honestly I figure no matter how bad it is, I mean even if it makes us wish for the glory days of TLJ levels of suck, I can see Disney bribing an Oscar win for it just so they can brag about they made an Oscar winning trilogy.
 
Why does the film HAVE to be out by December?

Can’t they push it back to May or some shit?
My brother theorizes that they push it out in December so it has a better chance of winning at the Oscars or some shit since it's fresh in audiences and voters' minds.

edit: kind of ninja'd, god damn it.
 
Pokemonquistador powiedział(a):
You know....ALLLLLLLLLL Disney had to do, was make a new version of the original trilogy where the torch gets passed to a new set of heroes, and they'd be richer than God's Banker right now. They could been lazy ; they could have copied all of the OT beat for beat, thrown in some fanservice, tossed in some great villains performed by some famous character actors, - easy peasy stuff. There was no way they were going to please ALL of the obsessive fans, but still, all they had to do make a simple hero's journey/save the world fantasy, leave out the George Lucas bad dialogue/political shit, make it all LOOK like the Original Trilogy and Boom! Money... We'd all be sitting here now talking about how the new movies weren't quite as good as the OT, but we'd admire how workmanlike they were, how well they managed to please most of the audience, and we might even be looking forward to the next installment.

I am astonished that a company so obsessed with making money, a company notorious for its rapaciousness, and its jealous hoarding of its intellectual property - that such a company would be willing to trade away the printing-money potential of one of the most profitable franchises of all time, for the chance to virtue signal. I know we've talked about this over and over again - Disney wants to buy Goodwill and thinks the way to do that in The Current Year is to push Girl-Power and Man-hating ; a bunch of crazy, empty suits got control over everything and decided to shit up the franchise by passing off their 8th grade fanfiction as an actual movie trilogy, etc, etc...

But really, you almost have to stand back and marvel over how Social Justice hollows out and destroys everything it touches. How it warps reality and makes otherwise competent people see the world in an upside down way. How a company could think ass-pats from Dangerhairs and Woke Twitter Influencers could in any way make up for the billions of dollars of losses in movie and toy sales. We've entered a strange world where the adults no longer know what they're doing. Where even natural instincts like greed can't keep the machine of industry running.

Get woke, go broke. Why is that lesson such a hard one to learn?
It could work but there's a questionable and lazy precedent being set that would require all future films to be OT knockoffs, which is basically what Disney, KK and JJ did but with a salty side serving of woke salad that was so bad that it made the rose-tinted glasses fall off your face when you puked. And all the while also removing any sense of familiarity and replacing everything with their own versions of donut steals, like not-Vader, not-Tatooine, not-Hoth, not-Nar Shadaa, not-Death Star, not-Yoda, etc. Even Rian's shitfest was just a shitty ESB knockoff at its core. The best way you can do something like that again is by having it take place a few hundred years after the original, otherwise it'll be like the same exact shit happens every other damn week, like saying the exact same catchphrases, compacter jokes and bigger versions of planet destroyers. At least putting a 100 or so year gap between such events seems more creative and lends itself to the notion that history repeats itself. And while the prequels are very flawed in not just writing, editing and world building, it is incredibly unique-looking and original, and some jap editors have even managed to salvage it into a great movie through a lot of hard work and that's not even counting the games, comics and animated shows based on them that greatly improved their image. The reason the OT was so influential is that while it was a scifi version of a japanese movie, the movie itself was original and unique enough to offer the ultimate form of escapism, to take you into a world the likes of which had never been seen or tried before on such a huge level with a mixture of fantasy, magic and science fiction. In a universe of infinite possibilities as presented in SW there's room for all sorts of amazing film ideas which sadly go unexplored due to fear of creativity, with Disney preferring the safe and lazy formula of repeating the same (as seen with all their remakes), instead of making something new that draws heavily from the original and it reminds you that its the same world but in a different and more exciting age with a new adventure where the torch has been passed to the next generation. Something that could've been continued for generations to come, but instead we just get OT repeats with no heart, lots of woke and no imagination. Honestly, Disney could've also just made a full blown remake and it might've been better received than a sequel without raising expectations too high. Even at its "peak" the best TFA offered was traitor memes and a lot of cringy Snoke theories and Kylo Ren fanfaggotry that even puts Twilight fans to shame. Even among TLJ haters I keep seeing fangirls moan and cry about how their precious Ben needs to be loved and saved from Rian. But in the end, while I'm saddened that this is how things turned out for SW under Disney, its at least exposed the douchery behind the scenes committed by Kennedy, JJ and Rian to people like Mark, Boyega and Tim Rose among others.
Well fuck a duck, I called it. They’re so fucking clueless that they’re even rushing it.
Yep. It'll be fun to see just how rushed this shit is. And it'll be funnier if the rumors are true that the producers, marketers and execs were mostly running things and it turns out that the first quarter of the film is a 30 minute advertisement for Galaxy's Edge.

And speaking of... I still owe you all the info regarding the final disappointments in the park, but before that I have received info regarding some the shows that will air on Disney+ to accompany nu-Clone Wars, The Mandalorian and Marvel's stuff. The ones listed so far are Chip and Dale shorts, a Monsters Inc series called Monsters at Work and a cartoon series about the Three Caballeros.
I’m also surprised they hadn’t announced reshoots yet for TROS, given it’s rushed production and the way they literally edit the film on set.
I haven't heard anything, but I remember reading on article from that site I posted that mentioned that JJ was still editing the movie. I doubt they'll have time for reshoots since according to the article, Disney execs want this movie ready by December with no delays or exceptions, so even if Jar Jar Abrams or anyone else wants to do reshoots, they won't be able to do a damn thing since the execs are hellbent on a Christmas holiday release.

Why does the film HAVE to be out by December?

Can’t they push it back to May or some shit?
Because Oscars and also every other Disney Wars movie has been released around the same time, and so they fear that releasing it later than that would upset investors and business partners as it would make Disney/Lucasfilm look like they're having trouble.

Anyway on to Galaxy's Edge.

First up, Docking Bay 7. Its the second largest and the "formal" restaurant of the park set inside of a docking bay. The only way to tell where it is without map is by the small ship placed on top of it which has the numbers 77 and 83 on it.

Here's a pic of its entrance and its rear with the ship on top:
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Despite the name, the restaurant isn't actually in a docking bay with ships and shit, its interior is just a really small warehouse designed to look like a cafeteria with three small "private tables" made to look like shipping crates. The seats are all fuel barrels.
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Here's a picture of the back where you make your order:
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My associate claims that it is loosely based on the cafeteria you see in Attack of the Clones (the one in the cargo ship Padme and Anakin were on). As some of you may remember, I mentioned in the past that Disney claimed this restaurant was run by the ugly, greasy mutant chef from TFA, but as expected, that was a lie on their part, as his name is written throughout the restaurant and the clerks will mention his name, he does not physically exist anywhere in the restaurant, like most non-existent aliens in the park.

The restaurant also has the smallest amount of SW references, with the only notable thing being the mention of the alien chef from TFA who was only seen for like a second in yellow Yoda's castle in the movie and doesn't actually appear at all in the park. Other than that, there's a few plastic "frozen" fishes and a few broken droids.

The food ranges from average to shit, with the "best" ones just being food you can get in other parts of the park like the plaza, the 50s diner, the Hungry Bear and the Lamplight Lounge but its arranged differently and served on "alien" tableware, mainly consisting of a black plate and a spork shaped like a foot.
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However these "alien" foot sporks were no longer given out after the first day and had been replaced with regular plastic forks. The plates are also starting to come back and forth. The foot sporks however are no longer given out. Criticism arose so they replaced the plastic forks with regular metal forks rather than the foot sporks, which hasn't stopped the complaints.
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Apparently the foot sporks were all stolen and now are all being sold on ebay for 70 dollars a piece.

I've listed the foods you can get here before, but I will be posting the complete printed menu which includes prices:
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If you want specific details and pics on any of these items, I've posted their pics and info before many pages back around page 450. Reviews are as I've said, mixed to negative, but the ones that are more well received are the desserts and the fried tip-yip which is just fried chicken with mashed potatoes which is the same thing they served at the Disney plaza restaurant, the main difference being that they add more butter. That's pretty much the same for the rest of the food, which is shit you can get elsewhere but with less or more added seasonings.

One item not listed on the menu is the breakfast.
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This one's a small dish called the Bright Suns Morning which costs 11 dollars. It consists of a three cheese omelette, two pork sausages, a potato and a mustafar bread roll. The roll you can get at the Cantina too.

Again, if you want any specific details on a certain food I'll be happy to oblige.

All that's really left to discuss is the cantina, the pet store and the toy store. Which one should I cover next? I'm considering covering the pet store and the toy store next since both shits are the same thing.

Christ almighty, I'm turning into Mauler with these walls of shitty text...
 
Ostatnio edytowane:
Despite the name, the restaurant isn't actually in a docking bay with ships and shit, its interior is just a really small warehouse designed to look like a cafeteria with three small "private tables" made to look like shipping crates. The seats are all fuel barrels.
It doesn't really feel "Star Wars", it looks more like something that could be built on one of the hangars of the Galactica.
It's also weird that there's no imagery, nothing on the walls, no posters, stickers, flags, First Order/Resistance propaganda or whatever, that would give the impression that it's a place where a lot of people come and go.

Why does the film HAVE to be out by December?
Can’t they push it back to May or some shit?
I could be wrong but I think they've pushed it back once or twice already (when KK fired Trevorrow and when she re-hired JJ).
 
Why does the film HAVE to be out by December?

Can’t they push it back to May or some shit?
It was supposed to come out last month had Trevorrow not been fired by Kennedy. Despite the lack of reshoots against what’s honestly a rushed production, the film is most likely ready to be dumped into theaters and the marketing is about to roll out soon.

Worse things to come if they delay it til May because it’ll die down interest from a rapidly declining fanbase. Personally, I think they should given that 2020 isn’t going to be a financially successful year for Disney as it was for the past four years.
 
Because Oscars and also every other Disney Wars movie has been released around the same time, and so they fear that releasing it later than that would upset investors and business partners as it would make Disney/Lucasfilm look like they're having trouble.
Maybe they also got the idea that not releasing in December was part of what sank Solo?
Wouldn't put it past these morons to draw such an asinine conclusion.

Yep. It'll be fun to see just how rushed this shit is. And it'll be funnier if the rumors are true that the producers, marketers and execs were mostly running things and it turns out that the first quarter of the film is a 30 minute advertisement for Galaxy's Edge.
I just hope it'll be Eight Crazy Nights levels of shilling for the places there, with some character being introduced to all the awesome places of the Baatu Spaceport for several minutes.
 
Do the pet store/toy store next! Sounds like they can be combined.
Aight.

First up, both the pet store and toy store are neighboring each other as both are just small stalls in the Merchant's Row area I've talked about before, and (despite the name) the pet store is just a toy store with the employees regularly breaking character as they keep forgetting to describe the toys as pets despite Disney's weird roleplay rules. Also the toy store looks nothing like its promo material implied while the pet store only loosely resembles its initial preview.

The pet store has no strange or alien name, its simply called the Creature Stall. Much like several other parts of the park, the pet store is run by an alien that doesn't actually exist. Her name is Bina and the employees may mention her as the owner of the store if asked but that's about it. Bina is a twi'lek name in pre-Disney lore so she may have been that for all we know, and if that is indeed the case then she's the only twi'lek related thing at the park aside from one tiny figurine sold at the Resistance shop.

The creature stall is a simple one room stall in the alley filled with cages and shelves.
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The merch isn't what attracts people to the store. The real attraction is a single animatronic loth-cat (I'll get to what that is in a moment) in a cage at the center of the store that's always asleep. The animatronic is designed to look like its breathing while sleeping and swing its tail a bit whilst it snores.
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It looks a bit cartoony to be frank.

There's not anything else to say about this underwhelming store aside from the merch which I will list now in order of best to worst based on reviews and popularity.

First up is the Kowakian Monkey Lizard. For you plebs who don't know, that's the name of the species of Jabba's court jester/pet Salacious B. Crumb. The Monkey lizard toy is a small puppet that functions like the banshee toy at Disney's Pandora.
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The toy comes in two variants, the first is obviously Crumb, the second is based on Hondo's (the pirate guy from Filoni Wars and Rebels) which is designed to have a parrot aesthetic. You place it on your shoulder and can control it via a small black controller on a long cable connected to its ass, the controller also has a button that when pushed makes it laugh. The parrot one looks gaudy as fuck, but the Crumb one looks pretty cute, but in the end these things costs over 70 fucking dollars.

Next up is the Worrt. For those who don't know, worrts are big fat frogs from Tatooine. Some are seen in and around Jabba's palace in ROTJ and are a recurring species in pre-Disney media that takes place on Tatooine.
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The Worrt looks miserable but its pretty detailed. Pushing a button on its back causes it to stick out its tongue. Note that the Worrt uses its pre-Disney design rather than its post-Disney design where it looks ugly as shit. I guess they realized nobody would want their nu-worrts. It costs 30 dollars.

Next is the Bantha. Its a small plush toy with detailed horns.
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This is the only Bantha you'll see at the park. Interestingly enough, promo material of the park displaying an early map indicated that the park would have Bantha farms where the Resistance warehouse is but they were cut out. It looks cute from the top and people seem to love them but they look kinda freaky when viewed from any other angle that's not the top. This little plushy costs 40 fucking dollars.

Next is the Dewback.
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They seem mostly well received although one guy was talking about the quality of the plastic. I can try and look into that again. They cost 30 dollars. Edit: Apparently the seams are poorly concealed and the plastic isn't very durable, with far higher quality dewback toys available online.

Here is the mynock toy courtesy of the Batuu merchant... Susan. According to Disney, the employees can make up fake alien names for themselves but all of them except the guy who runs the lightsaber store just use their real names, but whatever, back to the Mynock. The model is of a vacuum-dwelling mynock (with terrestrial ones having legs). Its tag is unique in that its homeworld is listed as Ord Mynock. Ord Mynock is a planet from the pre-Disney canon first mentioned in an old West End gamebook from the 90s. It was a planet filled with monstrous animals that could do the impossible, for example flying plants that survive on eating landspeeders and the Mynocks who can survive in outer space and eat electricity.
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If you press its tail it flaps its wings. Its mouth is a suction cup so you can put it on your car windshield. It costs 25 dollars.

Here are the fucking porgs.
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Unlike the other toys, Porgs get three variants, one as a puppet, one as a plushy and one as a "shoulder pet". This stupid plushy costs 45 dollars, the big puppet is almost at 70 and the littlest shit costs 20 dollars. Casual park goers love 'em. Ironically there's no roast porg available in any of the parks. According to official lore courtesy of the employees, "Porgs are friends, not food".

Next up is the fucking loth-cat. A loth-cat is a small wolf-raccoon-cat that shows up regularly in Filoni's Rebels cartoon and shows up like every other episode, with the only animal that comes close to its number of appearances being wolves. The Loth Cat is actually a remade nu-version of the Tookas from Filoni Wars which are themselves a remade version of the Adoris Feline from an old EU RPG guide, with the name change happening because Filoni's pet cat Tuuk passed away. Loth-Cats are an example of the lack of creativity in Rebels, as every animal in the show was basically Loth-[Insert real animal name here] due to the show mostly revolving around Lothal due to Disney not giving them a bigger budget.
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As seen here, the doll looks almost nothing like the one from Rebels, instead being designed to be cuter with more realistic non-beady eyes unlike the original. So honestly this is actually an improvement over Filoni's design. When pushed down the doll makes purring sounds. Also Loth Cats eat loth-rats, loth-mice and loth-goldfish according to one of the clerks... gee whodda thunk? This little shit costs 45 dollars.

This is the Krykna Spider toy, better known as a "Crawler" from Filoni's Rebels.
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Like most of Filoni's "original" ideas, these are taken from unused concept art, however unbeknownst to him, these creatures were already named in official ESB sources and used in a lot of pre-Disney lore media which he didn't know about until someone told him on twitter. In actuality Krykna Spiders were Knobby White Spiders from a deleted concept in ESB where after arriving on Dagobah, Luke was to witness or be attacked by one of these tree-like spiders which would then turn into a tree. This is because upon reaching maturity Knobby White Spiders degenerate into the many gnarltrees on Dagobah in a very interesting life cycle process, however in Filoni's Rebels, they're just regular spiders who are called crawlers with the name krykna only being used on occasion and also they're immune to blaster fire from starships for some reason. Here's a picture of the concept art of the Knobby White Spider that these creatures were based on.
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The quality of their paint job is a matter of debate. Some think its shoddy while others think it makes it look more wooden even though they're no longer tree spiders.
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They make sounds when pressed and cost 20 dollars. Apparently not very popular among casual park goers who all suffer from pussy arachnophobia.

These are puffer pigs, some mutant dino pigs with sickly dick mouths from Filoni's Rebels cartoon. In the show they are the Dobsons of the galaxy. When angry, scared, upset, or anything, they scream and inexplicably inflate to infinite proportions that just won't stop unless calmed down. Oddly enough, their tag lists their homeworld as being Kyryll's World, an old pre-Disney planet that was home to the Pui-ui. Not sure who they're trying to pander to with these EU references since Disney fans don't like pre-Disney lore, they alienated most old lore fans and casual park goers won't understand the extra effort put into this nerd lore.
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These little toy fuckers don't inflate though. They are squeaky toys that when squeezed make a sort of pig sound. They cost 17 dollars.

Here is the Rathar doll. Its the not-Dianoga from TFA. It vibrates.
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It costs 30 dollars.

This is a small Neebray figurine from Filoni Wars.
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Its more cartoony than the rest and costs 20 dollars.

This is the Tauntaun doll.
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Its been criticized as being ugly and derpy looking. It costs 40 dollars.

Finally here's the pièce de résistance. The Wampa doll, or as I like to call it, the "JUST FUCK MY SHIT UP" doll.
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It costs 40 dollars.

The pet store borrows a lot of elements from the pet store in Disney's Pandora park, but the difference is the experience is way less immersive since the employees really don't try to pretend these toys are animals and there's no "adoption" gimmick.

I was gonna do the toy store along with this one but time is just not on my side, so I'll have to write that one out in my next post.
 
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