Secret Gamer Girl / SecretGamerGrrl / Googleshng / "Violet Hargrave" / Jacob Lawrence (Jake) Alley / Violet Cassandra Ocean - Delusional Zoe Quinn Stalker, Libelous Tweeter, Thirsty Gnome, Faux-Tranny Neckbeard Incel, Micropenis, "Known Troubled Person", Creator of "Massive vs the Masses", Self-Described "Noise Making Thing"; Lives in Niantic, CT

[Jaimas]

Did he actually do freelance work for Paizo or is he just being delusional?

I've got it on good authority that he's done homebrew stuff for Pathfinder that he later pitched to Paizo as an example of what he can do. The problem, of course, is that Jakey has fulfilled none of the other requirements and is a fucking obvious male, ergo hedging him out of the position by default. There are better soyboys out there that can do what Jakey can and will actually bathe as part of the bargain.

 

[repentance]

Did he actually do freelance work for Paizo or is he just being delusional?

He has some 2017 copyright credits with Paizo, but it seems to be for minimal stuff.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

He has some 2017 copyright credits with Paizo, but it seems to be for minimal stuff.

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Can someone even explain what that stuff is in layman’s terms? Does it take 7 authors to come up with new character powers/traits and do they really have to credit each new move/scenario (idk the terms) with the 7 authors? Or is that just supplemental PDFs and the seven authors all contributed?

 

[Slick Bridges]

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So, Jake literally helped write the book on "Deceitful Incompetence"? Amazing.

 

[Feline Darkmage]

Can someone even explain what that stuff is in layman’s terms? Does it take 7 authors to come up with new character powers/traits and do they really have to credit each new move/scenario (idk the terms) with the 7 authors? Or is that just supplemental PDFs and the seven authors all contributed?

I'm no expert on any of this but I'm sure it's a lot like other collaborative efforts that have to do with writing (movies, videogames, and music albums come to mind as possible examples). Screenwriters in film are all credited no matter how much (or little) they contributed to the final thing and rock bands tend to credit each of their member(s) created the lyrics and sheet music for what they record.

 

[Directing]

Since the old images seem to be deleted, i uploaded them again, Jakes contributions to the free official Paizo fan magazine (#16).
A description of a (in world) boardgame and a creature description. Not something that would make me select him for a writing job.

 

[AnOminous]

Nora Reed is like Jake.

Nora Reed actually has her own Rat King. It's the most pathetic Rat King for the ones kicked out of all the other Rat Kings, but she still has it.

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Since the old images seem to be deleted, i uploaded them again, Jakes contibutions to the free official Paizo fan magazine (#16).
A description of a (in world) boardgame and a creature description. Not something that would make me select him for a writing job.

It's a worm morph. Obviously a self-insert.

 

[flipper]

Nora Reed actually has her own Rat King. It's the most pathetic Rat King for the ones kicked out of all the other Rat Kings, but she still has it.

Nora is in so many ways less pathetic than Jake. For starters, even though Nora has never held down a job, she has at least had genuine mental health issues she has been diagnosed with and takes medication for. Now despite being a jobless shut-in, she actually does produce content in the form of her Twitter bots that she has actually gotten recognition for, so her Patreon sponsors *actually* get something tangible for their money.

While they both share fake trans identities and both have delusions that their talents are greater than they actually are and both get wrapped up in pointless Twitter drama, Nora comes out way, way ahead.

 

[Diana Moon Glampers]

Heh. In a few months' time, Canada will be roiled with #MeToo accusations against their hottie PM. No one's gonna have time for these fringiest-of-fringe issues when the entire country is having a public meltdown, so you'd better get used to the country you have.

 

[Von Wolf Demon]

While they both share fake trans identities and both have delusions that their talents are greater than they actually are and both get wrapped up in pointless Twitter drama, Nora comes out way, way ahead.

I don't know much about Nora, but I don't think she wears velcro shoes? To me, that is the thing that pushes Jake over the top vs. nearly any lolcow... (not counting those like Kylie or the Hooligans who have no way to tie shoes). Nothing about Jake makes me laugh as hard as the velcro shoes. I've known kids with Downs who were capable of tying shoes. And some of them were bullies in their circles and would probably laugh at Jake if they saw him in public with Mommy. A non-exceptional individual wearing velcro shoes would be exactly their type of humor.

Jake doesn't even look that fat? It's not like he's Slaton-size or something.

 

[Ruin]

I don't know much about Nora, but I don't think she wears velcro shoes? To me, that is the thing that pushes Jake over the top vs. nearly any lolcow... (not counting those like Kylie or the Hooligans who have no way to tie shoes). Nothing about Jake makes me laugh as hard as the velcro shoes. I've known kids with Downs who were capable of tying shoes. And some of them were bullies in their circles and would probably laugh at Jake if they saw him in public with Mommy. A non-exceptional individual wearing velcro shoes would be exactly their type of humor.

Jake doesn't even look that fat? It's not like he's Slaton-size or something.

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It's a package thing for me. If you saw someone with one of Jake's individual traits you'd go "yea this guy is a little off" but when you combine

Fat
Bald
Gnome Beard
sped shoes
sweatpants
creepy leer

It's like a tardsplosion.

 

[Diana Moon Glampers]

The only person I knew without a cognitive impairment who wore Velcro sneakers as an adult was someone who was moderately to severely physically disabled (cerebral palsy) and used Velcro shoes to maintain a level of independence that wouldn't have been possible if she'd had to have someone else tie her shoes. Maybe the sped shoes are just Jake's mommy's way of not having to show him the bunny ear going through the loop every morning.

 

[AnOminous]

It's a package thing for me. If you saw someone with one of Jake's individual traits you'd go "yea this guy is a little off" but when you combine

Fat
Bald
Gnome Beard
sped shoes
sweatpants
creepy leer

It's like a tardsplosion.

Throw in all that but claiming to be a woman and to be persecuted by a global conspiracy of "Nazis."

 

[Hiragana]

Throw in all that but claiming to be a woman and to be persecuted by a global conspiracy of "Nazis."

And Communists, also known as Gamergate 2.0 to the Gnome. Everybody and their mother, especially his own mother, has it out for him. Only suicide prevention cat can be trusted.

 

[Chan the Wizard]

Jake and Nora are both at the same level for me. I just personally dislike Nora because until she was deplatflormed, she harassed people endlessly under the guise she was the good person.
Jake tries, but he never had the reach or power she did.
They’re both pathetic failures and it’s only because her parents can’t stand her that Nora doesn’t live at home.

 

[Maggots on a Train]

I don't know much about Nora, but I don't think she wears velcro shoes? To me, that is the thing that pushes Jake over the top vs. nearly any lolcow... (not counting those like Kylie or the Hooligans who have no way to tie shoes). Nothing about Jake makes me laugh as hard as the velcro shoes. I've known kids with Downs who were capable of tying shoes. And some of them were bullies in their circles and would probably laugh at Jake if they saw him in public with Mommy. A non-exceptional individual wearing velcro shoes would be exactly their type of humor.

Jake doesn't even look that fat? It's not like he's Slaton-size or something.

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[Tragi-Chan]

Throw in all that but claiming to be a woman and to be persecuted by a global conspiracy of "Nazis."

Yeah, this is it for me. Without the trans thing, he’d be your classic basement dwelling stereotype. But it's the fact that it's so at odds with the image he tries to project as this cool, intelligent trans woman who's hated and feared by hordes of violent Nazis that really elevates him for me.

 

[Apteryx Owenii]

The only person I knew without a cognitive impairment who wore Velcro sneakers as an adult was someone who was moderately to severely physically disabled (cerebral palsy) and used Velcro shoes to maintain a level of independence that wouldn't have been possible if she'd had to have someone else tie her shoes. Maybe the sped shoes are just Jake's mommy's way of not having to show him the bunny ear going through the loop every morning.

I know numerous older people who wear them due to arthritis making it difficult to tie laces.

In this case we all know it's a combination of being difficult for Jake to bend over and fat fingers.

 

[muh_moobs]

Throw in all that but claiming to be a woman and to be persecuted by a global conspiracy of "Nazis."

And afraid that someday a cishet man will murder you for refusing him sex.

 

[An Ghost]

And afraid that someday a cishet man will murder you for refusing him sex.

And that he only leaves the house twice a year because lesbians try to corrective rape him on sight.
Everybody is out to get Jake.