📚 Megathread The Pooner Zoo - A thread for collecting wild Pooners and posting OC Pooners, and anything Pooner related

[The Husband of yer Dreams]

Is that the "Pissed Off Lawyer" pooner? Or the one which had that *chef's kiss* magnificent courtroom meltdown?

It was Door #2, Rob Hopkins, that formidable amphibian, client ripper-offer and civil rights activist who delighted the internet this year. And delighted me, I was really sad to lose her. This was why the internet was invented.

 

[Uzumaki]

Pooner gets treated the way any man would and is still mad example #4894404849430
PjoP-dED0jvFUy8H.mp4

“It was pride month and nobody filmed it? On a bright sunny morning in Seattle?”

 

[Aunt Carol]

Diesel? Zeus?

Milo. Oliver. Elliott.

I've never seen a FtM name herself Diesel. That would at least get points for trying super hard.

 

[Frunkiss]

If she really got beaten up the day before, how come there's no bruising or swelling?

Because. It.Never.Happened.

Her tooth probably fell out due to the T.

 

[Owner of a Lonely Hole]

If she really got beaten up the day before, how come there's no bruising or swelling?

I thought the same thing. She got hit hard enough to break a tooth but her lip isn’t even swollen?

 

[Iron Jaguar]

Pooner gets treated the way any man would and is still mad example #4894404849430
PjoP-dED0jvFUy8H.mp4

"I thought I could be aggressive and confrontational to men. My Female Privilege meant that I've never experienced consequences for this until now."

 

[DYLAN ‘DIELAWN’ VOLK]

I don't believe that there were zero people waiting for the bus recording that totally real beatdown. It's Seattle, it's public transportation, it's morning so people are going to their shitty jobs, and there wasn't a single black person there that started recording it for social media? Honestly I don't even know if I believe this bitch has ever ridden a bus. She's open to being interviewed though! Conveniently no recordings exist, which is a detail that someone getting their face pummeled would probably not be able to verify during an assault on their fucking face. Where their eyes are.

They lie so much, and so terribly.

 

[⋖ cørdion ⋗]

Also I wouldn't call her a barber, she remains a "hairstylist", for women, butch women, and hons. Doods and their girlishness, I tell ya.

Nigga, try shaving! Skin care! Grooming! White folk grow out their boring brown hair and think that's all it takes to be a chick.

 

[Uncle Roger]

Diesel? Zeus?

King. It’s King. I had a pooner coworker with this name and I had to stop myself from laughing out loud at how on the nose it was.

 

[Big White Bwana]

Pooner gets treated the way any man would and is still mad example #4894404849430
PjoP-dED0jvFUy8H.mp4

@2.10-ish:
"...and they didn't even fucking FILM it?!?"
The vanity... Oh, the bare, naked vanity...
Must suck to know that the general public would sooner side with a mad and violent schizophrenic nigger, instead of a pooner.

 

[GenderCop]

If she really got beaten up the day before, how come there's no bruising or swelling?

I thought the same thing. She got hit hard enough to break a tooth but her lip isn’t even swollen?

Count me in, don't see any evidence of a beatdown or even being mildly roughed-up.

Maybe this is the pooner (lady) definition of getting beat up?

 

[Julie Newmar]

Count me in, don't see any evidence of a beatdown or even being mildly roughed-up.

Maybe this is the pooner (lady) definition of getting beat up?

Well, y’see, words are violence and all so it was the equivalent of three beat downs to call her a woman. Her doodsoul is broken, her gender has a compound fracture, and her tdick is bruised.

 

[The Great Ducktator]

StellerBoy is a prime specimen of a pooner with zero masculine interests. Which revolve around the usual girl hobbies of aggressive men, cute animals, pretty colours and styling herself. Her profile starts of strong with the [current agreeable opinion] and immediately goes crazy.

"Support Palestine or Fuck Off Forever.
Feel free to DM me your bad opinions so I can block you and share a screenshot of your shitty take with everyone.

Hi! I’m not a girl.
If you’re a straight man and you’re into me? You’re either not actually into me or you’re not straight.
Decide before reaching out.

Interested in queers, some women, and extremely few men.

If you message me and your profile picture is just a close up of your genitals I expect an explanation of why you made that choice in your message otherwise it’s just going in the trash. Tbh it’s likely to end up there either way.

I’m pretty touch-captivated. Flirty brushes, snuggles, bites biting bited, being held, grabbed or restrained harshly, long hugs, being given marks to enjoy later, touch touch touch
If you want to see me instantly melt play with my hair/give me scritches."

Lovecraft couldn't have written a better character from Providence.

Spoiler: Profile

Spoiler: Pictures

Her kinks revolve around getting play-raped and creampied in. But not by men attracted to women.

Spoiler: See

Spoiler: She wants grindr, but for non-straights

Spoiler: Probably autistic

 

[satanic ritual victim]

I saw this video and was amazed to find that this is a recent video and not from 2020/2021. I often find myself genuinely confused as to how people act like this and post themselves on the internet. I'm not even talking about the fat genderblob stuff either, she wears one of those gross leather dog masks

https://www.tiktok.com/@dhamienscho2.0

 

[Chandelier]

Thought piece pooner:

Wyświetl załącznik 9099692

“ "On the day I heard that my penis would be huge, I sobbed.

In the car outside the doctor’s office afterward, I bent my torso in half and bawled, my face against the dashboard, my boyfriend petting my back to console me but confused. Isn’t it good news that they can do it? — like: At all? And obviously, yes. It was. Growing up without one, I’d thought or maybe convinced myself that mine would grow in later — to the extent that when I see a woman in tight pants, I still often instinctively think, Where is her penis? — but my period at 12 aptly, agonizingly bled to death that increasingly implausible dream of reconciling with life, with God, that he wouldn’t make me like this and leave me like this forever. So the news, 28 years later, that the agony was going to be over — abundantly over — was a bit much to take in.

I fixated instead on the information that a pert little average-flaccid package was not an option for me. (If I even wanted that.) (And did I?) When I’d asked the surgeon how big my impending penis was going to be, he could only guess, pointing to the reusable water bottle in my hand, a metal cylinder nine inches in circumference: “Smaller than that.”

I was so different from everybody else already.

I was already always so different."

https://nymag.com/intelligencer/article/gabriel-mac-essay.html

I guess this is quite old but was reposted on Reddit

This pooner is infamous for saying she - when she still identified as a woman - was gangraped in Haiti during the 2010 earthquake. Turns out, she was not raped at all, and later 'came out' with a photo of her arm skinned down to make that Frankendong.

 

[Snack Cracker]

This pooner is infamous for saying she - when she still identified as a woman - was gangraped in Haiti during the 2010 earthquake. Turns out, she was not raped at all, and later 'came out' with a photo of her arm skinned down to make that Frankendong.

I thought she just witnessed a gang rape in Haiti while she was a reporter, not that she was gang raped herself.

She had a whole thing on “secondary PTSD”.

 

[Frunkiss]

Count me in, don't see any evidence of a beatdown or even being mildly roughed-up.

Maybe this is the pooner (lady) definition of getting beat up?

She not doing a good job of cosplaying as she's forgetting most men in that situation don't post it to bitchtok or where ever and cry about it like a girl.

If it did happen, surely there would have been some kind person who would asked if was was ok etc? Lil' doodt has convinced herself that it happened the way she has framed it. I'm surprised she didn't add 'and then everyone clapped' (about the nigger who pushed her).

 

[Drip Torch]

That would at least get points for trying super hard.

If Diesel can tear down and rebuild a carburetor, I might just give them a man pass.

 

[Aunt Carol]

Lovecraft couldn't have written a better character from Providence.

Of course he couldn't have; Lovecraft didn't write female main characters.

 

[Frunkiss]

She not doing a good job of cosplaying as she's forgetting most men in that situation don't post it to bitchtok or where ever and cry about it like a girl.

If it did happen, surely there would have been some kind person who would asked if was was ok etc? Lil' doodt has convinced herself that it happened the way she has framed it. I'm surprised she didn't add 'and then everyone clapped' (about the nigger who pushed her).

Sorry for my tardspeak.