I mean, Divorcecoin is as strong as it ever was. Marriage was a sham from minute 1. It really seems like Khet just kicked the door down to tell him he was being too loud. No bed shuffling noises. Realistically, and it's been said a lot, it is what it is. She's a professional beard, they sleep in separate rooms, they have separate finances for the most part, and in exchange Phil gets to say he has a soulmaid. Ah, and she's totally hot, blonde, loves giving sloppy toppys, cooking and cleaning, contributes to the finances... You wouldn't know her or ever see her though, she's from Canada.
Alright then. I mean, I see no reason to not take proven to be trustworthy Philip "Darksy" Burnell at his word. He said it's true, so. Khet back to swimsuit mahdel levels.
Anyway, I'm just saying this divorcecoin stuff because I KNOW Phil will narc semantics us into oblivion if left unchecked. OH THEY ARE RETARDS, THEY SAY THE KHET IS GONE. No dude, we say the marriage is fake, you pucker kissed on your wedding, you probably didn't even consummate it, she's a rebound from PandaRee, she obviously doesn't give a fuck about you and is fleecing you for room and board, you're in the closet, and having a soulmaid does not really count as a real relationship. I know he reads us and has for many years and I strongly suspect he knows from tidbits that most of us are also married by now, some of us even have kids, and that's why he's gotta bust out the military grade copium with the "THEY ARE ALL LOVELESS BASEMENT DWELLERS."
Hell yeah man. We're so jealous you sugar daddy for a BPD demon-slaying 3/10 fat potato lady from Michigan, go Phil, enjoy your W. Like most things about your life, you're making your win condition so piss easy and pathetic it's entirely meaningless. Maid stuck around due to free food and housing, while potentially getting vigorously blacked in a yellow thong, caw caw? Shit, chalk up another big W for the kingsnake.
Jenna is slinging pussy at 20 bucks a pop. Can't imagine that doesn't factor into older, fatter, uglier, about as autistic Kat's decision making.
Moving on, Ozempic pretty much confirmed at this point? Bitchtits and less cravings, cutting down on DSP Tries It and he even gambles less. "Khet is slim now" alright, sure, she got it from one of those "Doctor's appointments" and the "Darkest time in my life" was she was at risk of the beetus because she was a blimp, even though he sold it to PPP like she might have cancer. So she gets prescribed Ozempic and he breaks into her stash.
As everyone knows every healthy marriage involves the man sneaking off to have late night drunk phonecalls with his gay sidepiece and the wife having to get on his case because it's sleeping hours and he's making a ruckus. Not because he has a gay sidepiece, that part is bespoke and understood.
Overall, this phone call was a big dub for Phil and I hope we get more to get shown how happy he is (He told us) and how sussesful he is. (He also told us.)
