💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Głosy: 6 0,4%

  • April-May 2024

    Głosy: 6 0,4%

  • June-July 2024

    Głosy: 17 1,1%

  • August-September 2024

    Głosy: 34 2,1%

  • October-November 2024

    Głosy: 37 2,3%

  • December 2024

    Głosy: 44 2,8%

  • Sometime in 2025

    Głosy: 256 16,1%

  • Sometime in 2026

    Głosy: 261 16,4%

  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Głosy: 930 58,5%
  • Łączna liczba głosujących
    1 591
Wyróżnienie
Skwisgaar Skwigelf powiedział(a):
https://youtube.com/watch?v=AqoI-Xn4lzUWyświetl załącznik 5676565Wyświetl załącznik 5676568Wyświetl załącznik 5676597Wyświetl załącznik 5676598

Well, He's done it!

Jack is now 100% back to normal. He feels great while he's struggling to stand and breathe!
Kliknij, aby rozwinąć...
LOL, I fucking called it. He gave up posting his weight on FB and youtube after last week and just claims in the video that he's fateaued at 267. Fucker has probably actually gained weight.
1/29/24 WEIGHT BP 147/76 SUGAR 136
Kliknij, aby rozwinąć...
His BP is still horrific, his SHUGUR is still high because he's a liar. Never change Fatty, never change. Waling better, confidence better, sleep better... lol. Going to do another month, of course he is. He's just going to keep lying about his diet, while gorging on meat/cheese/grease. Says his brother claims he shouln't worry about the weight/bp/sugar? Those 3 are his major issues, lol. "still loving the food, not tired of meat" no shit. Meanwhile this fuck can barely breathe. He apparently wants to buy an alligator now? Guess he's tired of PULPORK and chuck"steak" so we're going to get PULGATOR.
 
God damn he's creepy with his partial paralysis and lazy eye, is he in character for the next resident evil villain..

''EETCHYY, GIB MEET, SCRATCHY''
 
curbside2 powiedział(a):
If he plateaued his weight then he's not following his diet. You can't plateau with an extreme diet.
Kliknij, aby rozwinąć...
His diet is "eat as much as you want" and he's interpreting that as a personal challenge. Calories are apparently imaginary to him.

There might be foods that you can literally eat to the point you physically cannot eat any more, and not consume enough calories that you'd actually gain weight, but that applies to foods that Jack wouldn't want to eat anyway. Like celery. Meat and cheese definitely aren't.
 
Kosher Salt powiedział(a):
There might be foods that you can literally eat to the point you physically cannot eat any more, and not consume enough calories that you'd actually gain weight, but that applies to foods that Jack wouldn't want to eat anyway. Like celery. Meat and cheese definitely aren't.
Kliknij, aby rozwinąć...
Some light soups are good for this, even just a broth has outsized effects for what its actually made of. Miso's become a breakfast favorite of mine just because its bizarrely filling for being so low calorie. Of course Jack would immediately refuse it on the grounds of being Soy.
 
Kosher Salt powiedział(a):
His diet is "eat as much as you want" and he's interpreting that as a personal challenge. Calories are apparently imaginary to him.

There might be foods that you can literally eat to the point you physically cannot eat any more, and not consume enough calories that you'd actually gain weight, but that applies to foods that Jack wouldn't want to eat anyway. Like celery. Meat and cheese definitely aren't.
Kliknij, aby rozwinąć...
I think this fat fucker can’t let go of the sugar filled rubs and sauces.
 
Kosher Salt powiedział(a):
His diet is "eat as much as you want" and he's interpreting that as a personal challenge. Calories are apparently imaginary to him.

There might be foods that you can literally eat to the point you physically cannot eat any more, and not consume enough calories that you'd actually gain weight, but that applies to foods that Jack wouldn't want to eat anyway. Like celery. Meat and cheese definitely aren't.
Kliknij, aby rozwinąć...
Pretty much any leafy green, low calorie vegetable you could eat as much as you want of and you wouldn't gain weight. Things like celery, broccoli, spinach, etc... Plus if you ate that much, you'd get diarrhea real bad from all of the insoluable fiber. Broccoli has something like 80 calories per pound, so even if you eat 20 lb of broccoli in a day (good luck with that), it'd be only 1600 calories. I think spinach and celery are even less.

But Jack is a gluttonous idiot so he eats as much cheese and beef as he can and expects to lose weight
 
Skwisgaar Skwigelf powiedział(a):
https://youtube.com/watch?v=AqoI-Xn4lzUWyświetl załącznik 5676565Wyświetl załącznik 5676568Wyświetl załącznik 5676597Wyświetl załącznik 5676598

Well, He's done it!

Jack is now 100% back to normal. He feels great while he's struggling to stand and breathe!
Kliknij, aby rozwinąć...
Not even a month into his 'diet' (that he regularly cheated on when going out to eat with Hammy) and fatty is already throwing in the towel on tracking his weight/BP. Apparently Jack has found the miracle cure for all his ailments so there's no point in tracking his dangerously high blood pressure anymore, even though this 'diet' of his hasn't caused him to lose any non-water weight after four weeks. Who could have ever predicted that eating slabs of uncooked beef and blocks of cheese for lunch would put you in a caloric surplus?

His sugar being in the 130s and unchanged from his results from the first week of his 'Carnivore' diet is so hilariously on-brand for Jack. You just know fatty's been slathering his meats with his shitty corn syrup BBQ sauce because he's such an undisciplined lazy piece of shit

As a sidenote, his strokeface is so unsettling to look at that I can't even watch Jack's videos to make fun of him anymore. There's just something about his his one bug-eye and the other one half-shut combined with that gurgling voice that creeps me out
 
topshrek powiedział(a):
As a sidenote, his strokeface is so unsettling to look at that I can't even watch Jack's videos to make fun of him anymore. There's just something about his his one bug-eye and the other one half-shut combined with that gurgling voice that creeps me out
Kliknij, aby rozwinąć...
They're windows into his brain which is half dead tissue. It's just lesions and fluid. There's barely a human behind those eyes and what's left is dying.
 
AnOminous powiedział(a):
They're windows into his brain which is half dead tissue. It's just lesions and fluid. There's barely a human behind those eyes and what's left is dying.
Kliknij, aby rozwinąć...
I said it before and I'll say it again: it is a mighty level of karma that instead of being given a quick release of death from his health problems, Jack instead loses functions one by one and has to live as a prisoner inside his own body.
 
LordofCringe7206 Vol. 2 powiedział(a):
I said it before and I'll say it again: it is a mighty level of karma that instead of being given a quick release of death from his health problems, Jack instead loses functions one by one and has to live as a prisoner inside his own body.
Kliknij, aby rozwinąć...
There are certainly people who deserve such a horrifying, undignified, slow death more than Jack, but not many who voluntarily inflict it on themselves out of pure pigheaded stupidity.
 
Wyróżnienie
Musisz się zalogować lub zarejestrować, aby odpowiedzieć.
Wstecz
Top Na dole